Interpret this text please - AITA?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm in my 50s and hate talking on the phone. My DH WFH and I text him to ask a question. I love texting.

But, sending a flower instead of answering is definitely this guy's way of not committing to an answer about tomorrow. To his credit, he didn't not text at all. Plenty of people do that.

OP, you might not be a good fit for this.

You may have misread the OP. Not only did he commit, he actually suggested they hang out tomorrow. OP confirmed.

OP here: No, I suggested we hang out tomorrow. He did not suggest it. And he did not commit - later when we texted he said he couldn't do tomorrow. He committed to next week.

All before the flower?

I said I was free to hang out tomorrow. And next weekend.
Flower.
I said my feelings were hurt.
As part of his response he said tomorrow wouldn't work.

OP - you are troll or very bad at communication. This is not what was said in the OP or first couple pages of responses.

Wow, everyone must be drinking tonight. OP said exactly what she said she said.

Saturday night posts are some of my favorites for people being so self-righteously wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm in my 50s and hate talking on the phone. My DH WFH and I text him to ask a question. I love texting.

But, sending a flower instead of answering is definitely this guy's way of not committing to an answer about tomorrow. To his credit, he didn't not text at all. Plenty of people do that.

OP, you might not be a good fit for this.

You may have misread the OP. Not only did he commit, he actually suggested they hang out tomorrow. OP confirmed.

OP here: No, I suggested we hang out tomorrow. He did not suggest it. And he did not commit - later when we texted he said he couldn't do tomorrow. He committed to next week.

Based on your posts, which have everyone confused, maybe written communication is not the best option going forward. Try calling next time

Wow. I am the PP you misread. I didn't misread (as confirmed by OP.) You clearly continue to misread. So I would say your written comprehension is not the best. So maybe dial it back a bit.

There are multiple people with different interpretations which means OP wasn’t clear.

Saturday evening reading comprehension is frequently not great.

[Anonymous]

You seem 15, not 50.

[Anonymous]

I would drop you in a hurry if you responded so negatively, OP. Yes, unfortuntely, YATA. If you think he needs to work on his communication, then you definitely need to work on your emotions and reactions.

[Anonymous]

If he couldn't meet the next day, then that's what he should have said. He was clearly avoiding a real response by sending a picture of a flower. OP, this is a red flag and you know this. That's why you felt "hurt". I don't think you're TA. Don't stick around for him to keep doing this to you.

[Anonymous]

Just pick up the phone and call.
Texts are fine but only up to a point

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm in my 50s and hate talking on the phone. My DH WFH and I text him to ask a question. I love texting.

But, sending a flower instead of answering is definitely this guy's way of not committing to an answer about tomorrow. To his credit, he didn't not text at all. Plenty of people do that.

OP, you might not be a good fit for this.

You may have misread the OP. Not only did he commit, he actually suggested they hang out tomorrow. OP confirmed.

OP here: No, I suggested we hang out tomorrow. He did not suggest it. And he did not commit - later when we texted he said he couldn't do tomorrow. He committed to next week.

All before the flower?

I said I was free to hang out tomorrow. And next weekend.
Flower.
I said my feelings were hurt.
As part of his response he said tomorrow wouldn't work.

I understood all of this

[Anonymous]

I don’t think text is the best way to communicate hurt feelings. But I also think his initial response (the flower) was kind of dopey and evasive. How are things when the two of you are together?

[Anonymous]

Uhh…he is the a. When someone tells you that they are free to get together tomorrow if you are available, then your next response should be whether or not you are available.

This is true in any context.

[Anonymous]

OP is cognitively off-kilter. Let this thread end.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think text is the best way to communicate hurt feelings. But I also think his initial response (the flower) was kind of dopey and evasive. How are things when the two of you are together?

It’s amazing when we’re together! Really great. Very mutual. But it’s difficult to find the time- it’s complicated.

I have been duly chastened by the reactions on this thread. I know I need to change here.

[Anonymous]

This thread is bizarre.

OP: I’m free to get together tomorrow if your are. Yay!

BF: (flower)

That’s not a normal response.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is bizarre.

OP: I’m free to get together tomorrow if your are. Yay!

BF: (flower)

That’s not a normal response.

+1
I don't think OPs response was great either. OPs response to the flower should have been something like: "nice flower. Are you also free tomorrow?"
If he still avoids the question, then stating your hurt might be appropriate.

[Anonymous]

If you hate texting, CALL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think text is the best way to communicate hurt feelings. But I also think his initial response (the flower) was kind of dopey and evasive. How are things when the two of you are together?

It’s amazing when we’re together! Really great. Very mutual. But it’s difficult to find the time- it’s complicated.

I have been duly chastened by the reactions on this thread. I know I need to change here.

PP here. Actually, I don’t think it’s as simple as you being in the wrong and needing to change. You only see him once a week and that makes communication difficult. You expressed genuine excitement to see him, and it’s understandable that his reaction was disappointing and hurt your feelings. It’s all valid. You’re not “TA.”
His response was lame.

I think in this situation, texting back “pretty flower” and then picking up the phone snd calling him to clarify - is he free tomorrow? - is a reasonable thing to do. Texting about your hurt feelings - in the context of minimal interaction and communication between the two of you - just sets an awkward and unpleasant tone.

I’m probably not explaining it well. I imagine you feel emotionally close enough with him to share these feelings, so maybe I’m just wrong. And your disappointment is valid and shouldn’t be brushed under the rug. Have you been together a long time?