Many things you say/assume are not true 1) "If he dropped visitation time as you wouldn't let him have weekends and probably wouldn't allow other times.". He had visitation M/W/F after school until bedtime and all day Saturday. He dropped visitation, without consulting me. He did so just prior to his marriage, telling the kids he and his STBW had to use the day he dropped for them to do something to prepare for the wedding, and then after the wedding he never picked visitation back up. 2) "You didn't want him involved and were not at all flexible and he probably got blamed for it." - I absolutely was flexible and bent over backward to accommodate him - to my personal and financial detriment. I only stopped when the kids themselves said they preferred a regular schedule and even then his scheduled 50% was sacrosanct unless he himself cancelled, which was often. 3) "He shouldn't have to pay extra in child support if you have full custody and he only has a few days of visitation." His child support was calculated on the basis that he would reliably take the kids for a certain days/times per week. He often cancelled in order to travel for weeks at a time at short notice. I would often have to either hire childcare to fill in his time that he abandoned or I would have to cancel my own work and use my own social capital to cover for his abandoned parenting time. Child support was never adjusted to compensate for that. Parents typically pay for half of necessary childcare. He never paid for his half - preferring just to take it out of me personally. 4) "You choose to have him stop being a parent." - I chose to have him stop being my husband. He made his own choices about whether to continue being a parent. Unbelievable the lengths to which some people will go to make up lies to protect men! |
He can hire a nanny and it sounds as though you are objecting just to be nasty and controlling. If you had to travel for your job, you wouldn't think twice about leaving child with a nanny. |
This was really true in my case - offered DH 50/50 but he didn't take it. |