Accidentally ate undercooked burger :(. Terrified.

Anonymous
OP, please take ALL the previous advice about getting your stress under control. Not just for your pregnancy but for your future child - if you are this freaked about miniscule risks now, how on earth will you get in a car with an infant? Or introduce solids? Or let him/her learn to walk/run/ride a bike/swim/go on the monkey bars?

Life is full of risk. You have been on the down side of that, I get it, so have I. And I'm highly neurotic. But that doesn't always (ever?) help protect them; I was such a freak with my first child that I refused to give him Yobaby or any God forbid processed food with, horrors, sugar. Turns out he got E.coli at 12m from the blueberries that I was pureeing in his yogurt. He's a ridiculously healthy 10yo today. And yes, he eats pink burgers and runs all kinds of other risks, mostly happily.
Anonymous
I have two healthy kids. I ate sushi, RARE steaks, steak tartare, wine and lots of other yummy forbidden things.
Anonymous
It's fine.

OP, as an anxious person, I can tell you you will not survive parenthood with this mentality. It isn't healthy for you or your child. You CAN be on medication - I was and have two healthy boys - and it is WAY better for your kids than being surrounded (in or out of utero) by this kind of anxiety. I'm serious.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Most of these responses are very insensitive. Did you read that she does see a therapist? That she has told her doctor? Anxiety is not always easily treatable.


It is with medication, which is better for baby than this level of anxiety. I hope her therapist knows that.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Most of these responses are very insensitive. Did you read that she does see a therapist? That she has told her doctor? Anxiety is not always easily treatable.


It is with medication, which is better for baby than this level of anxiety. I hope her therapist knows that.


It might be treatable with medication (which she should try) but it is not always and not everyone can tolerate the side effects.
Anonymous
Oh my God. Some people should not have children. Really, I feel awful for this poor baby. And for OP, too. Your life sounds like a living hell, and who wants to live that way?
Anonymous
That sounded worse than I meant it. I mean, take the medication and get your anxiety under control. Show your posting to your OB.
Anonymous
I really hope this is a troll.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Oh my God. Some people should not have children. Really, I feel awful for this poor baby. And for OP, too. Your life sounds like a living hell, and who wants to live that way?


I said this earlier and OP tattled to Jeff and it got deleted. Truth hurts, I guess.
Anonymous
We went to Italy in my second trimester and I ate a big, delicious bistecca Fiorentina, cooked rare, because that is the only way to eat a good steak in my world. Holy crap, it was yummy.

My kid is fine. Healthy at birth, nothing worse than the usual baby and toddler bugs.

And OP needs to find a better therapist if hers isn't taking her anxiety seriously. I've seen kids of overly anxious mothers, and it's not pretty. It is really bad for your child to live with this level of fear.
Anonymous
I've been on this site for almost two years and have seen a lot of abuse, but its amazing how mean people are being to OP. I'd love to see some science behind "this level of stress is more likely to cause a miscarriage than listeria" because that sounds like more bullshit fear mongering than catching listeria from a medium hamburger. Is anxiety healthy? no, but neither is being yelled at for it by internet strangers.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you for your comments. They really did make me feel better. I have done a lot of research, and it is true that listeria contaminates raw ground beef. I'm not saying that to belittle any of the comments above. I just want others to know that before they dig into a hamburger that hasn't been cooked to well done. Ground meat should be cooked to 165 degrees F. Medium rare steak is a different story - the bacteria lives on the outside, and when the edges are seared, the bacteria is killed. Healthy bodies are able to fight off the bug with no issues. The problem is with compromised immune systems, such as in pregnancy. And unborn babies have practically zero immune system, so they are extremely susceptible. I realize that it very rare to get it, even then. It just depends on what happens when it enters the body. I really just wanted to hear - "I ate it, and we turned out okay."

Yes, I have anxiety. I do see a therapist regularly. I have been unable to take medication (4+ years TTC, remember?). That will totally change once our family is complete. I have a hormone deficiency that contributes to both my anxiety and fertility issues. I appear to be like any other normal functioning person. I hold down a decent job. When I've told my doctor about my anxiety in the past, she just sort of pat me on the shoulder and said it can't possibly be as bad as I project. It's disappointing, really. I paid for therapy out of pocket until my insurance decided to cover it. I feel bad for people who don't have that option. My DH is fabulous. He has known me for all of my adult life, and he's very sensitive to my fears. He grew up vegetarian, so he's used to it, and we have dabbled in vegetarianism before. And, just to make another thing clear - the last two mcs were chromosome related. We don't know the cause of the first one, but I can tell you I was over-the-moon excited and not nearly as anxious.

I am not a troll. Just a real-life woman who has a wanted to be a mother for as long as she can remember.


OP ignore the wretched trolls on this thread.

I have anxiety disorder that I treat with CBT. My anxiety was much worse in pregnancy because of the hormones involved, so I understand why you are having a hard time.

I really would take the advice that you can't control everything in pregnancy, so worrying and stressing won't help. Sometimes we all accidentally or intentionally take risks -- it's part of life, and it happens no matter what. You can't be hermetically sealed for the duration of your pregnancy, and even if you were, bad things can still happen (not that they will, but you can see that the illusion of control is just that -- an illusion -- and you can let go a little).

I indeed have eaten rare burgers during both of my two pregnancies, and everything worked out fine. I've even eaten sushi or other "off limits" things here and there. Listeria contamination really isn't as common as you'd think in foods -- it's a possibility but not a certainty. All is fine with my kids: one DC is 3 and so very healthy (we're talking, doesn't even catch colds levels of healthy). One is 1 and is so smart and energetic.

You really have almost nothing to worry about. And even if you did worry, what good would that do? The anxiety would just tank your immune system more! Just try to remember that worrying after the fact won't change any outcomes except to introduce more stress and interfere with your life and your happiness.

If your therapist doesn't do CBT, find someone to talk to who does. It's perfect for anxiety disorders when you can't medicate.

Congratulations on the baby, and I am sure you are both going to be just fine.

Anonymous
As someone who has had more than 1 miscarriage and am still struggling to conceive, "I get it". I did the same thing while I was pregnant and second guessed everything I ate, did, smelled, and I'm NOT someone with a history of anxiety - so I can only imagine. I would not worry about the hamburger, plenty of woman have eaten far worse and have had totally normal healthy pregnancies. You are so lucky to have a supportive DH. You are in my thoughts OP, I know you will get through this.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I have two healthy kids. I ate sushi, RARE steaks, steak tartare, wine and lots of other yummy forbidden things.


+1

I have 2 healthy teens. I did all of this--but then, I'm not American.
Anonymous
I only eat meat that is pink inside. Never used a meat thermometer ever. I have 3 healthy kids. OP, if your therapist dismisses your concerns, you need a new one. If you miscarry, it won't be due to pink meat. Did you say that you don't eat out? If you only eat at home due to your anxiety about food, that's pretty bad. Get a new therapist STAT.
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