Blended Family; Polar Opposite Kids

[Anonymous]

Wow, some really awful PPs. I think it's great the OP is trying to find ways to help. I don't know the answer, but bio kid shouldn't have to downplay his achievements and not be celebrated. Though I do believe that he should humble about his achievements.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Kindness. They must each show genuine interest and affection to the other. Celebrate their goals and successes, sympathize during their defeats.

If it is framed as a competition it's going to suck. If we think of the situation in the extreme it might be helpful. If one child had down syndrome or was profoundly delayed in some other way, how would things go? In this case the gap is smaller, but kindness is key.

Why must they show anything at all? They didn’t vote for this, adults did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Help them find mutual interests - music? Beyonce? skateboarding? whatever. Then they can talk about that. It's okay if one is academically ahead of the other. They just need to be kind and encouraging to each other.

Wut?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Blended family with two high school aged boys. My bio kid runs circles around his older step brother in terms of maturity, achievement and drive. Blended family or not, I grew up an only child and I'm worried about how this will effect them both.

It's becoming very blatant that they're on two different paths and I'm not sure how to navigate this divide, especially while making sure both of them have the supports they need.

It's not just that my bio kid is significantly ahead, but that older step brother is significantly behind.

Dinner conversations are a little uncomfortable given the divide sometimes and I'm looking for perspective and suggestions on how to minimize this.

You don't sound very kind to your stepson and need to put in equal if not more effort into him. Sounds like this is a parenting issue in your home given you don't treat the kids the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, raising your step son is the job of his parents. Express concerns once and drop it.

Raise your own son to be kind and humble. Not everyone is dealt the same hand.

Yep. It’s not your problem OP.