Would it be too Mommy Dearest...?

[Anonymous]

Okay, I have posted about this before and nothing has changed. DD breaks things of mine on a weekly basis. Well, maybe it is less than that but the point is she has been explicitly told (since it happened so often) that she can not touch ANY of mommy's things. Well, DD strikes again. Broke something I just purchased. In fact, I found it in her room! And she didn't tell me about it. Not happy with that either. In fact, I am FURIOUS. She is six. She knows she shouldn't be doing this but she does. We are not talking an accident. This was clearly her playing with something that did not belong to her.

I have tried all the suggestions given when I posted about it before. Time outs/discussions/making her pay it back through chores/loss of priveledges, etc. It has lessened I suppose but it just needs to stop. I tried to find the thread posted recently on this topic where the son broke a vase but couldn't find it.If anyone can locate that, please post.

In any event, I am at my wits end so this is my new plan.

She breaks something of mine, I "accidentally" break something of hers. I know it sounds crazy but nothing else is working.

[Anonymous]

Not a good plan!

[Anonymous]

I doubt that would ever work. At her age, she has little impulse control and she wouldn't understand the tit-for-tat punishment. Even worse, it teaches her to use the same technique to handle conflicts with others. What kinds of things is she playing with and breaking? If I have something that I treasure, I keep it out of reach.

[Anonymous]

Uh, no.

[Anonymous]

You rules are too strict. She wants to play with you and your stuff. Give her some of your old stuff to play with.

You sound mean.

[Anonymous]

IMO, it would be damaging a relationship that is already damaged. You sound like someone who loves your stuff more than your kid. Put your things away if you don't want her to touch them.

[Anonymous]

No it doesn't sound like it good plan. I don't enemies your other posts so sorry if this has been addressed. Have you had her evaluated? This seems to go beyond normal poor impulse control.

[Anonymous]

Lady, you are off the wall. Seems like you are already "mommy dearest." Kids break stuff- that's their MO. Sounds like she wants to be close to you or wants you to engage with her. Put your nice stuff away, take it out in five years. Anything reachable is fair game even if it is an accident. I don't think this is a discipline issue or I'd give other advice. You're the problem. Poor kid.

[Anonymous]

Breaking something of hers will not fix this problem.

Of course she hid the thing in her bedroom and didn't tell you - she knew you'd be furious and punish her.

I think if I were you, I'd cut down on buying tchotchkes and when I did buy them, I'd keep them in my bedroom and put a lock on the door. But really, I'd stop buying things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Okay, I have posted about this before and nothing has changed. DD breaks things of mine on a weekly basis. Well, maybe it is less than that but the point is she has been explicitly told (since it happened so often) that she can not touch ANY of mommy's things. Well, DD strikes again. Broke something I just purchased. In fact, I found it in her room! And she didn't tell me about it. Not happy with that either. In fact, I am FURIOUS. She is six. She knows she shouldn't be doing this but she does. We are not talking an accident. This was clearly her playing with something that did not belong to her.

I have tried all the suggestions given when I posted about it before. Time outs/discussions/making her pay it back through chores/loss of priveledges, etc. It has lessened I suppose but it just needs to stop. I tried to find the thread posted recently on this topic where the son broke a vase but couldn't find it.If anyone can locate that, please post.

In any event, I am at my wits end so this is my new plan.

She breaks something of mine, I "accidentally" break something of hers. I know it sounds crazy but nothing else is working.

Did she break it on purpose or did she break it accidentally while playing with it? If you "accidentally" break her toy, how will she know that you are enacting revenge for the broken item? Your logic is very flawed and will never work.

[Anonymous]

It's your job to supervise a young child. Teaching her "the rules" is not enough. You don't seem to understand YOUR responsibilities. You don't turn a child loose and expect that things are going to be just fine.

[Anonymous]

I'm looking at my 5 year old and imagining purposefully breaking something of hers. OP must be mentally ill to do that to her child.

[Anonymous]

You know, there are so many flaws in your thinking I don't even know where to begin.

You are angry with your child for breaking things. So what? Kids break things. End of story. Your expectations are way, way off. GROW UP. YOU. You, OP. The adult.

If you were to break her things, what would that fix? You would have a house full of broken things. You are really screwed up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You know, there are so many flaws in your thinking I don't even know where to begin.

You are angry with your child for breaking things. So what? Kids break things. End of story. Your expectations are way, way off. GROW UP. YOU. You, OP. The adult.

If you were to break her things, what would that fix? You would have a house full of broken things. You are really screwed up.

Not angry. She's "furious".

I think a parenting class is needed. Or therapy.

[Anonymous]

OP,

I think you've gotten some constructive advice. Hope you follow through on some of it.