Anyone with ASD DC1 and NT DS2 less than 2 years apart?
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Anonymous
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Our toddler son was recently diagnosed ASD, and we have another boy on the way. I’ve read that the odds for ASD increase to 20% for siblings, and I’m terrified. Additional risk factors for us are: pregnancy spacing and both boys; I have no idea how much more all these combined increase the risk for younger DS. In the two families we know that fit these criteria, the youngest also has ASD.
Anyone has children less than 2 years apart with the younger being NT? Please specify the youngest one’s sex. Thank you. |
Anonymous
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So not exactly the situation you are looking for, but our sons are 3 years apart. While DS has speech delay(we are thinking mild apraxia), he is not on the spectrum. We received the ASD diagnosis when I was pregnant so it was an emotional time. I know it is impossible not to worry, especially once it is in your head, but it is just not worth it or healthy for the pregnancy. There is nothing you can do about it now. You will have a wonderful baby boy who will have his own gifts and challenges with a diagnosis or not. We found a lot of comfort in signing up for a sibling study at Kennedy Krieger. That way we knew that the younger one would be seen on a regular basis by professionals looking for the earliest signs of ASD, and other delays. (Because in our experience, the pediatrician just did not cut it. The visits were so short and everything was wait and see which I was terrible advice!) So you are not only giving back to the research community but also know that should any red flags come up, they are caught as early as possible which makes all the difference in the world.
Hugs and best of luck to you and enjoy your growing family! |
Anonymous
| One of the reasons I spaced my kids farther apart. |
Anonymous
OP here, thank you for sharing and for the advice. I also read that developmental delays or learning disabilities are common for siblings of ASD children. We already plan to have the little one in a similar sibling study, so he'll be watched carefully for early signs. FWIW, I had the same experience with our pediatrician, and so did many other moms of children with ASD. They should be the primary supporters of the early diagnosis & intervention movement, and many are gatekeepers instead. |
Anonymous
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Yes. My 3 year old DS is ASD and my one year old DS so far is NT.
It scares me half to death when I call DS2 and he doesn't look right away. We weren't expecting DS2 and DS1 was only 14 months by the time I got pregnant again. I do not recommend this. My one year old is only 16 months so only time will tell. |
Anonymous
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PP here, I also tried to enroll DS2 into a study at the local children's hospital that would monitor him until age 3 with regular brain scans.
We were found ineligible for the study because DS2 was born at 35wks due to preE. |
Anonymous
My kids are spaced pretty far apart both are SN and although not ASD my #2 has social (pragmatic) communication disorder and is more delayed than the older sibling. So spacing may not be a magic bullet. OP, please don't let this stress you out. I know families with the older ASD and younger not as well as with sibs who are both ASD. The good thing is that there are lots of opportunities for intervention whether you have 1 or 2 on the spectrum. |
Anonymous
This is so helpful to the OP. Maybe she can just cross her legs and keep DS #2 in for another 2 years. |
Anonymous
| I respectfully disagree with the previous post that said there is nothing you can do about it. If I had it to do all over again, there are many things I would have done differently. Make sure you take plenty of vitamin D. This will prevent maternal bone loss that occurs during pregnancy and the release of maternal toxins like heavy metals that collect over your life span and can be released from bone storage to the developing fetus through the placenta. Don't get any dental work done while pregnant and wear a night guard if you have mercury amalgam fillings, especially if you grind your teeth or drink a lot of hot liquids. Drink filtered water only. Don't get a flu shot. The flu shot is one vaccine that still contains thimerosol/mercury preservative. Don't eat fish, especially large species. Avoid high fructose corn syrup. Eat adequate cholesterol (eg eggs) since cholesterol is so important for the developing brain. Eat lots of organic leafy greens. Determine your MTHFR gene status. If you have this common mutation you should not take folic acid, but metafolin/folate. |
Anonymous
| I don't think spacing is a magic bullet either. As someone who works in the field I have seen many scenarios of age gaps between siblings that are diagnosed (or are NT). |
Anonymous
Oh, really? Did you also make sure you got the highest educaiton level possible and make the highest income? Those two factors are also very important for the child's ultimate success. If not, I guess you did not avoid every possible risk for your unborn. You negligent mother you. Because it is an increased risk, you total jerk. I am sorry, but you are. Also increased risks: being older. having older husband. Both of these might be outweighed by having close together children, yes? Also, PreE is a risk, and is usally less of a risk when children are close together. The research regarding the link between close spacing and autism is in its infancy, and while a link was found there is no explanation why. It was posited that it may be because parents are more aware of normal development. Also, the conclusions all note that decisions regarding family planning should not be based on the young data. |
Anonymous
I am sorry, and I am all about empoweing women -- but acting like this is all going to avoid possible autism is irresponsible. Women don't have children with special needs because they did not do these things. And countless, the vast majority, of women have normal children and do none of this. The illusion of control you think you have here is dangerous. How on earth do you know any of this would have impacted anything???? No OB, even at the highest risk place, is going to give a pregnant woman this list. |
Anonymous
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OP, I know a family with 3 Boys. Twins are 4 yrs6M and little one is 2Yr5M. Only one Twin is ASD but the remaining two are NT kids.
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Anonymous
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Mine are 3 years apart but the 2nd ds is NT.
I remember taking my older ds for his evaluation when #2 was an infant and the therapist coming over and spending time with ds2 in his infant seat and afterward saying, "He has really good eye contact." I was annoyed at the time because I was like, of course, he's not the one we're here for today. But of course now I realize why. |
Anonymous
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Mine are 17 months apart. We don't have a diagnosis of ASD for our older son, but he has speech/communication delay (and seems very spectrumy to us) and receives special ed services. Our younger child, also a son, is NT.
During my second pregnancy, I had dental work, drank unfiltered water, ate zero eggs and very little cholesterol, could not stomach leafy greens for the full nine months, had a flu shot, and wasn't great about remembering prenatal vitamins. I think that wen though there are genetic and statistical risk factors, the whole thing is still a big crap shoot. You sound like a very concerned mom and I know how hard it is not to worry. However, all kids will have their strengths and weaknesses, and I find it reassuring to remind myself that being NT isn't some guarantee of success or an easy future, and being ASD or special needs doesn't mean everything will be hard. My younger NT son is three, and now that my older son is doing great with his school and therapy, he's the easy one! All the best to you! |