Best way to handle family member coming out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:we have loved you all these years and knew you were gay,

Maybe change “knew” to thought you might be.

ugh no. don't say that. what is the point? it's rude.

"I love you, let me know if there's anything to do to support you"

[Anonymous]

We have a situation where half of the grandchildren in the family have come out, which tracks with those stats about how half of students in SLACs etc. now label themselves queer. However I have to wonder if ten years from now, half of the next generation of my family will be gay. I wonder about making a big deal about being supportive if it turns out to be a phase for at least some of them. If they change their mind later, what would it feel like to have your relatives all tell you that they always knew you were gay. I also think you might reach out to the parents having a hard time and not villainize them. They may experience grief about the vision that they had for their family and that too is valid and should be recognized.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When my 13 year old told me he was gay I said thanks for letting me know, and I will love him whoever he is, even if he turns out to be a republican. He laughed and said that’s true love.

I was thinking I might say "Oh thank goodness! I was afraid you were going to tell me you are a Republican."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When my 13 year old told me he was gay I said thanks for letting me know, and I will love him whoever he is, even if he turns out to be a republican. He laughed and said that’s true love.

I was thinking I might say "Oh thank goodness! I was afraid you were going to tell me you are a Republican."

Oh my god, that's an amazing line.

[Anonymous]

"Thanka for letting me know. Let me know if you want me to introduce anyone to you. I'm here if you ever have questions touvneed to talk about."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When my 13 year old told me he was gay I said thanks for letting me know, and I will love him whoever he is, even if he turns out to be a republican. He laughed and said that’s true love.

I was thinking I might say "Oh thank goodness! I was afraid you were going to tell me you are a Republican."

Oh my god, that's an amazing line.

Oh my god, what a stupid and ignorant line.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the replies.

I meant is that it is “freeing” in that he can talk about his boyfriends etc just like we talk about ours. There has always been a sadness about him that I hope will change

Understand about not making a big deal and treating him same.

Still wondering if saying “we have loved you all these years and knew you were gay, and nothing changes and we will just continue as is” is off limits?

Any different advice for an elderly grandmother whom he is close to? What would be most supportive? (She has also assumed he was gay for years and could care less).

So it's not a good look to tell someone, especially a teen, that you're imagined them having sex and you think you know what sort of people are a better fit.