Ok so unless the while school is invited, small gatherings are evil cliques and exclusive and wrong. There is zero chance you live by this rule in your own life. |
I think it’s pretty obvious why they didn’t invite you |
Shut your trap troublemaker |
15 women isn't a small gathering. I doubt OP would have had the same response to 4 or 5 moms from the school having lunch. It sounds like initially it was just a few moms and not awkward but as more and more people started arriving, it became clear it was a very large group and thus more awkward that she had apparently not been told anything about it. I find it weird how many commenters can't seem to accept the idea that in SOME instances, failing to be more inclusive with invites can be viewed as clique-ish or rude. It's not a very out there idea. If you worked in an office and all the other women in the office got together for lunch but never invited you, would you find that cliquish? If a neighbor had a BBQ and invited every family on the block but you, would it hurt your feelings? I mean, come on. |
I have never seen this. I’m sure it could exist. But, I don’t know of one. |
Point made. |
I read through a lot of this thread really trying to understand the perspective of those who think this is somehow mean but I just don't get it. If it was a well defined group (all moms of a class but one, all moms from the PTA but one, all moms on a particular street but one) I would totally understand. But this does not sound like that's the case. I'm really baffled. |
OP doesn’t even know this crowd well, why they were together or who organized it. So why should this have been an inclusive get together of 100 or more? You make no sense. |
They’re weirdly triggered. |
You're putting words in OP's mouth. I feel, based on all the clues given, that there is some ambiguity about the closeness of some of the friendships, like she miscalculated just how tight she was with the subdivision friends. Also still need clarification from OP about the regularity of this day drinking get together. |
No, you are. She said it was only 2 people from her neighborhood. OP was at the winery alone so its not like shes too good for the place. There are no victims in this story. |
How are you going from 15 to 100? You are making a bunch of assumptions about the size of the community in order to justify your position. But OP actually Iives there and says it felt awkward, so I guess it was awkward for her to see them together. That indicates that the group was expansive enough that it felt strange that OP wasn't extended an invite. It's so weird to me that some of you can't take that at face value. The other women were also awkward/embarrassed by it. Even they felt like they were being exclusionary! |
What’s the limit, since apparently nobody can be left out. OP doesn’t even know everyone how can it be a snub when you aren’t even tight? If all randoms have to be invited of course it will be a huge get together. |
She said only 2 were from her subdivision. Out of 15. This wasn’t a block party. |
+1 and there were over 100 kids in the elementary school classes, so no one expects events where everyone is invited, not even kids' birthdays. |