Is it true the Lacrosse player from Lightridge HS was Bullied or not?

[Anonymous]

Maybe this player could play for the Indy boys team? they could use the help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There were no reports at LR.

She didn’t start or play much last year. After starting previously. The parents got upset. Blamed the coach. There was no bullying. Thats why no action was taken because none was warranted.

If she was still starting at LR none of this happens.

The family assumed she could transfer to the new school, play for the club coach and would be starting again.

Indy didn’t try and recruit her. The club coach didn’t try and recruit her. The parents threw a tantrum and then blamed everyone around them.

Mentioning by name the kid from LR as lead bully goes to prove they actually don’t care about mental health of teenagers or you wouldn’t falsely accuse a teenager publicly.

[/quote

Wow - you clearly know us, so if you want to talk, feel free to reach out. Lauren

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While the player’s parents, rightfully so, are catching a lot of heat over this transfer situation it would be foolish to believe Indy and it’s coach did not discuss and encourage actions taken by the player. The Indy coaches know full well what the LCPS transfer policy is and it appears they either turned a blind eye to the rules hoping they could circumvent them the system or they grossly misguided the player.

Your statement presumes manipulation. How about they were helping a troubled kid. How dare they. Btw - who cares. It is girls public school lacrosse. Should have granted the waiver and just moved along. If it had been, bball and a poc, no problem.

The parents bear full responsibility for people concluding there was manipulation here due to their manipulative PR pressure campaign where they ommitted key details in an attempt to whip up sympathy for the girl. You don't go give a dozen "woe is me" media interviews and then have it come out in court that in reality you wanted to play with your friends and former club coach at your new HS, which just happened to have been states runners up last year.

I have no doubt LCPS took one look at those details last summer, when the transfer was initiated, and concluded they couldn't grant the waiver the family wanted. And rightfully so. Going on a 6-month media tour to try to force a reversal wasn't a good look.

Thanks so much. Last July we told the County exactly what it was about Indy that made Lily choose it - a trusted group of friends and adults from club lacrosse.

Well there you go then. It’s no wonder the waiver was denied. That isn’t a valid reason to transfer.

Also please get off your high horse about mental illness. It’s truly offensive to those of us who have actually dealt with kids experiencing it.

[Anonymous]

Why do you care if she transfers? If she isn’t a starter and didn’t play, it will change nothing except the kid will be happy.

I mean isn’t she at the new school? Sounds like she was committed to leaving and left. Let her play!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care if she transfers? If she isn’t a starter and didn’t play, it will change nothing except the kid will be happy.

I mean isn’t she at the new school? Sounds like she was committed to leaving and left. Let her play!

There are rules. Why does one person get a pass? Season started time to move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care if she transfers? If she isn’t a starter and didn’t play, it will change nothing except the kid will be happy.

I mean isn’t she at the new school? Sounds like she was committed to leaving and left. Let her play!

This scenario creates two challenges - one for the player and one for VHSL.

Assuming this statement about her being a non-impact player was just made by others as justification to accept the athletic transfer, what happens if the player does start or plays a lot? This places the player in a no win situation. If she starts or plays her true intentions for transferring will be questioned and would seem to validate what many on this board have been saying, the change was really about sports.

If the VHSL allows any player to simply transfer because the student was “committed to leaving and left” how would they ensure fairness of play and competition? This opens the door for players in any sport to leave for whatever school they believe has the best team, coach, academics, most friends, presents the best opportunity to receive college offers, etc. Recruiting at the high school level becomes an even bigger reality in this situation. Their rules are in place to protect all.

Hopefully this situation has brought light to the fact LCPS and VHSL have different transfer rules. LCPS has to grant a transfer student waiver before the VHSL will consider the matter. One does not guarantee the other. Hard lesson learned, but one others should keep in mind for the future.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care if she transfers? If she isn’t a starter and didn’t play, it will change nothing except the kid will be happy.

I mean isn’t she at the new school? Sounds like she was committed to leaving and left. Let her play!

There are rules. Why does one person get a pass? Season started time to move on.

Thank you rule police! You shouldn’t care - it doesn’t affect you.

Like the Bad News Bears, let her play!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care if she transfers? If she isn’t a starter and didn’t play, it will change nothing except the kid will be happy.

I mean isn’t she at the new school? Sounds like she was committed to leaving and left. Let her play!

wait, are you saying she is not a starter? how does a player who is not a starter as a senior in HS get recruited to play on a college varsity?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:While the player’s parents, rightfully so, are catching a lot of heat over this transfer situation it would be foolish to believe Indy and it’s coach did not discuss and encourage actions taken by the player. The Indy coaches know full well what the LCPS transfer policy is and it appears they either turned a blind eye to the rules hoping they could circumvent them the system or they grossly misguided the player.

Your statement presumes manipulation. How about they were helping a troubled kid. How dare they. Btw - who cares. It is girls public school lacrosse. Should have granted the waiver and just moved along. If it had been, bball and a poc, no problem.

The parents bear full responsibility for people concluding there was manipulation here due to their manipulative PR pressure campaign where they ommitted key details in an attempt to whip up sympathy for the girl. You don't go give a dozen "woe is me" media interviews and then have it come out in court that in reality you wanted to play with your friends and former club coach at your new HS, which just happened to have been states runners up last year.

I have no doubt LCPS took one look at those details last summer, when the transfer was initiated, and concluded they couldn't grant the waiver the family wanted. And rightfully so. Going on a 6-month media tour to try to force a reversal wasn't a good look.

Thanks so much. Last July we told the County exactly what it was about Indy that made Lily choose it - a trusted group of friends and adults from club lacrosse.

Well there you go then. It’s no wonder the waiver was denied. That isn’t a valid reason to transfer.

Also please get off your high horse about mental illness. It’s truly offensive to those of us who have actually dealt with kids experiencing it.

Ick…you seem to think you’re the only one with a child experiencing a mental health crisis. Have some empathy. And you do understand cause-effect-solution, right? Child is struggling with mental health and possibly bullied so child needs new environment so child/family choose nearby school where child has a support system…any parent who truly understands that struggle would support this even if they for some reason didn’t support that the child should then be able to play the sport they love and provides what is documented as a healthy outlet. So who are you to question what this kid experienced? As someone who says they understand mental health challenges in a child have some empathy and stop assuming the kid was faking it. As a parent who can also relate I’d never question that. Your sense of superiority in owning mental health challenges with a child is baffling. We have a crisis with our teens so there are plenty kids and their families struggling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care if she transfers? If she isn’t a starter and didn’t play, it will change nothing except the kid will be happy.

I mean isn’t she at the new school? Sounds like she was committed to leaving and left. Let her play!

Exactly-the school waiver system and sports waiver system need to be coordinated. Too late for this player but it seems like it can create an even worse situation without it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care if she transfers? If she isn’t a starter and didn’t play, it will change nothing except the kid will be happy.

I mean isn’t she at the new school? Sounds like she was committed to leaving and left. Let her play!

This scenario creates two challenges - one for the player and one for VHSL.

Assuming this statement about her being a non-impact player was just made by others as justification to accept the athletic transfer, what happens if the player does start or plays a lot? This places the player in a no win situation. If she starts or plays her true intentions for transferring will be questioned and would seem to validate what many on this board have been saying, the change was really about sports.

If the VHSL allows any player to simply transfer because the student was “committed to leaving and left” how would they ensure fairness of play and competition? This opens the door for players in any sport to leave for whatever school they believe has the best team, coach, academics, most friends, presents the best opportunity to receive college offers, etc. Recruiting at the high school level becomes an even bigger reality in this situation. Their rules are in place to protect all.

Hopefully this situation has brought light to the fact LCPS and VHSL have different transfer rules. LCPS has to grant a transfer student waiver before the VHSL will consider the matter. One does not guarantee the other. Hard lesson learned, but one others should keep in mind for the future.

What it does is show that this is not good. If someone decides a school transfer has merit based on mental health or bullying then it should be across the board waiver. Playing sports or being involved in extracurriculars are positive ways to heal so it should be all or nothing and consistent. Hopefully this at least shines a light on that. And for any athlete needing to transfer in Loudoun it’s just sent a message you better have the funds to rent or buy in the desired location or have the funds to go private, and that’s out of touch for many.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care if she transfers? If she isn’t a starter and didn’t play, it will change nothing except the kid will be happy.

I mean isn’t she at the new school? Sounds like she was committed to leaving and left. Let her play!

This scenario creates two challenges - one for the player and one for VHSL.

Assuming this statement about her being a non-impact player was just made by others as justification to accept the athletic transfer, what happens if the player does start or plays a lot? This places the player in a no win situation. If she starts or plays her true intentions for transferring will be questioned and would seem to validate what many on this board have been saying, the change was really about sports.

If the VHSL allows any player to simply transfer because the student was “committed to leaving and left” how would they ensure fairness of play and competition? This opens the door for players in any sport to leave for whatever school they believe has the best team, coach, academics, most friends, presents the best opportunity to receive college offers, etc. Recruiting at the high school level becomes an even bigger reality in this situation. Their rules are in place to protect all.

Hopefully this situation has brought light to the fact LCPS and VHSL have different transfer rules. LCPS has to grant a transfer student waiver before the VHSL will consider the matter. One does not guarantee the other. Hard lesson learned, but one others should keep in mind for the future.

What it does is show that this is not good. If someone decides a school transfer has merit based on mental health or bullying then it should be across the board waiver. Playing sports or being involved in extracurriculars are positive ways to heal so it should be all or nothing and consistent. Hopefully this at least shines a light on that. And for any athlete needing to transfer in Loudoun it’s just sent a message you better have the funds to rent or buy in the desired location or have the funds to go private, and that’s out of touch for many.

This is not the first time a student has been accepted by LCPS and denied by VHSL.

I don’t know the details presented by this student to secure the LCPS waiver, but isn’t the threshold for changing schools low and simply based on capacity in Loudoun County? If the school has room transfers are usually granted assuming the student can get to/from school with their own transportation. The student then applies for a waiver each year. The vetting process for approving a change in schools by the LCPS is not too strict.

The VHSL is completely separate from LCPS. They are responsible for ensuring fair play in sports across the state. Their policy is clear in that transfers accepted by a new school will be required to sit out of sports for a year. The exception being students moving into the new school district.

I’m not saying this is the case with this one student, but with schools setting the transfer bar so low based on capacity the potential for schools to recruit athletes is real. To discourage this behavior and keep sports fair the VHSL enforces the one-year ban on playing sports. I would imagine the bar is very high for the VHSL to allow a transfer. Clearly, in their minds it was not met in this case.

This student’s parents knew the rules, or should have known them. There should not have been any expectation on their part of a waiver approval by the VHSL, especially when others have been denied in the past. And while their intent for seeking a waiver may have been good, they have to understand not everyone’s intentions are and respect the VHSL’s decision to enforce their rules to protect sports. Not maintaining a high bar for sports waivers could lead to recruiting chaos.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care if she transfers? If she isn’t a starter and didn’t play, it will change nothing except the kid will be happy.

I mean isn’t she at the new school? Sounds like she was committed to leaving and left. Let her play!

This scenario creates two challenges - one for the player and one for VHSL.

Assuming this statement about her being a non-impact player was just made by others as justification to accept the athletic transfer, what happens if the player does start or plays a lot? This places the player in a no win situation. If she starts or plays her true intentions for transferring will be questioned and would seem to validate what many on this board have been saying, the change was really about sports.

If the VHSL allows any player to simply transfer because the student was “committed to leaving and left” how would they ensure fairness of play and competition? This opens the door for players in any sport to leave for whatever school they believe has the best team, coach, academics, most friends, presents the best opportunity to receive college offers, etc. Recruiting at the high school level becomes an even bigger reality in this situation. Their rules are in place to protect all.

Hopefully this situation has brought light to the fact LCPS and VHSL have different transfer rules. LCPS has to grant a transfer student waiver before the VHSL will consider the matter. One does not guarantee the other. Hard lesson learned, but one others should keep in mind for the future.

What it does is show that this is not good. If someone decides a school transfer has merit based on mental health or bullying then it should be across the board waiver. Playing sports or being involved in extracurriculars are positive ways to heal so it should be all or nothing and consistent. Hopefully this at least shines a light on that. And for any athlete needing to transfer in Loudoun it’s just sent a message you better have the funds to rent or buy in the desired location or have the funds to go private, and that’s out of touch for many.

This is not the first time a student has been accepted by LCPS and denied by VHSL.

I don’t know the details presented by this student to secure the LCPS waiver, but isn’t the threshold for changing schools low and simply based on capacity in Loudoun County? If the school has room transfers are usually granted assuming the student can get to/from school with their own transportation. The student then applies for a waiver each year. The vetting process for approving a change in schools by the LCPS is not too strict.

The VHSL is completely separate from LCPS. They are responsible for ensuring fair play in sports across the state. Their policy is clear in that transfers accepted by a new school will be required to sit out of sports for a year. The exception being students moving into the new school district.

I’m not saying this is the case with this one student, but with schools setting the transfer bar so low based on capacity the potential for schools to recruit athletes is real. To discourage this behavior and keep sports fair the VHSL enforces the one-year ban on playing sports. I would imagine the bar is very high for the VHSL to allow a transfer. Clearly, in their minds it was not met in this case.

This student’s parents knew the rules, or should have known them. There should not have been any expectation on their part of a waiver approval by the VHSL, especially when others have been denied in the past. And while their intent for seeking a waiver may have been good, they have to understand not everyone’s intentions are and respect the VHSL’s decision to enforce their rules to protect sports. Not maintaining a high bar for sports waivers could lead to recruiting chaos.

I have no clue—I figured there was a formal process to transfer that required documentation of a legitimate reason and that this one was granted based on the child’s situation at the previous school. What is inequitable and probably a lawsuit waiting to happen is the inequity that the sports waiver presents. Only athletes are potentially penalized if they have a documented need to transfer. So let’s say an actor whose drama teacher doesn’t see them as a star wants to be the lead in plays or wants to be at the new school with the fancy theater or art studio or isn’t the first chair in their instrument at their school so wants to change or wants to be at a school with a higher academic reputation to win on the math competition they can just switch schools if there’s room with no penalty? I get the need to keep sports equitable but these other things are competitive too plus they are huge advantages in college admissions, so it seems like only athletes can be penalized for making a move—whether it’s just for sports or there is a personal issue at a school.

[Anonymous]

If the parents and community truly cared about mental health and bullying (two very serious topics) why was a formal complaint not made against the previous program? The remedy would have been to replace the coach and educate the current players on what is acceptable and what is not. In other words, fix the situation. This way the player can stay in the home school. No move would be needed. If the old program was what they say it was, why subject future players to that environment?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the parents and community truly cared about mental health and bullying (two very serious topics) why was a formal complaint not made against the previous program? The remedy would have been to replace the coach and educate the current players on what is acceptable and what is not. In other words, fix the situation. This way the player can stay in the home school. No move would be needed. If the old program was what they say it was, why subject future players to that environment?

There is no perfect or universal solution to bullying and/or mental health challenges. Many kids aren’t strong enough in that moment to take the big stand and just want out—it’s understandably all they can handle at the time and they worry if they raise a complaint against certain students or a teacher or a coach things can get worse. This situation sounds sticky so it’s not hard to see why the girl and her family thought it might be easiest and the most positive solution to just move to a school with friends already there. Victim shaming is always wrong and we wonder why more kids (and adults!) don’t speak up about bullying, abuse, assault.