Nastiness of the boards

[Anonymous]

OP here, ooops I didnt know you had to register to vote, there goes that idea.

To clarify, pp, its not that my sensibilites are offended, it just that its such an incredible waste of time to scroll through 8-10 useless vitrolic post to find that kernal of information.

My point on being forced to register under an anonymous screen name, is that there becomes a minimum level of accountability, no one will eve truly know who you are, but they will know if you are the same person posting over and over again. Also, the sheer act of forcing someone to take the time to sign up, register and confirm will actually make them rethink whether or not the comment they are about to make is worth the effort. In that way you dont have these ridiculous flaming posts that people just bomb the site with.

[maynie]

Anonymous wrote:

maynie wrote:There is no way it will ever happen. This website has such heavy traffic because of the anonymity. Jeff did try a board where you had to be logged in to post and had to delete it because no one used it.

I don't agree, and I don't think that Jeff's prior set up of a sub-board for registered users only was a valid test. Why would anyone have wanted to use a user name on a sub-board when posting anonymously to the original board was still an option? Of course it got no traffic.

Well, you make a good point. I still don't think the board will ever change. There's a lot of nastiness, but also a lot of helpful, considerate posting, as well. It all makes for a good board, in general.

[jsteele]

The idea of requiring registration comes up every couple of months. The bottom line is that it's not something we will do at this point. It is far more likely that I will be driven to implement registration by the out of control spambots than I will be by nasty posts, but even that is not on the horizon at the moment.

DCUM can't be compared to Mothering.com. DCUM is basically a hobby with no professional staff. I have no interest in moderating the hundreds of messages posted here daily. Nor am I interested in managing a staff of volunteers to do it. I do not wish to be the arbiter of good taste and I can assure you that you also don't want me in that role. The work load for handling registration problems (I forgot my username, I forgot my password, I tried to register but it didn't work, etc.) is immense. I don't have the time for it.

DCUM is what it is. There are those who like it and those who don't. To the extent that there are nasty posters who are ruining things for others, I do put a lot of effort into getting them to change their ways. Most trolls and sock puppets are easily identified and generally are brought to my attention by other users. If you feel a thread is being undermined by such a user, let me know about it.

Also, about the poll. Anonymous users should be able to vote but there appears to be bug in the code that is preventing it. It's not important enough for me to fix at the moment, however.

And finally, for those in favor of registration, the best way to deal with this issue is to lead by example. I'd bet that 99 percent of the threads that support requiring registration are started by anonymous posters. I'm sorry, but it's really hard to take you guys seriously. Walk the walk a while and see if it's really such a good thing.

[Anonymous]

I used to post on a Weight Watchers website where support is supposed to be key to success. We all had to log in with registration names (no payment required though) and it was also very snarky. Perhaps not as bad, but I stuck with a very limited forum and there, supposedly people all had the same goals.

Who cares if people are negative here? Dont read those threads, dont respond to those posters. The reason they get out of hand is usually bc someone responds to a ridiculously obnoxious post. Ignore it and it will go away.

[Anonymous]

I agree PP. I am a big girl, and while sometimes I read a post that makes my eyebrows go up, I know that I can dismiss it and read what I want to read. Snarky posters only have power if you give them the power. I do not need yet another thing in my life monitored...

[Anonymous]

I would like it if everyone had to register, but I don't want to stand out myself as one of the very few who do right now.

And I definitely disagree with holding up mothering.com as a shining example of a better system -- I used to post there but I avoid it now because I find the user agreement so upsetting and basically fascist. I mean, it explicitly says you are not allowed to post anything that disagrees with ANY of the party lines on sleep, discipline, diapering, being anti-vax, etc etc etc -- AND that you are not allowed to discuss or complain about the user agreement itself! They go so far as to forbid talking about it on OTHER websites, so if they knew I was here and what my mothering.com account name is, they could give me demerit points (seriously!!) towards being deleted. Hello, George Orwell. It's a privately-run website and their right to run it like that, but I won't be a party to it. Creepy.

[Anonymous]

I am fully against full scale moderation and monitoring of these boards. I think the nastiness here is no more than on any other forums, and it does no good to give someone the power to decide what constitutes nastiness and what doesn't. I have seen places (other mom boards) where that kind of monitoring power has turned into complete power tripping and basically anyone who disagreed with the moderator on anything was automatically banned and deleted.

I have found some posters here very rude and stupid, ignorant, racist, mean and negative.... But I have also found lots of advice, support and helpfulness. I wouldn't be surprised if these things come from the same people at different times.

Basically, I stand with Jeff Steele. If you find this place too offensive, go elsewhere. There are tons of other groups in this area that may better suit you. Or maybe they will just post niceties in public and speak ill about you behind your back. We are all human. We judge, we voice opinions. We're nice sometimes, we're mean others. You will get all of that here and in the "real world."