Emotional relationship / affair - Where is the line

[Anonymous]

Yep, that's was my DH's lead up to his actual affair also.
You're deluding yourself if you think otherwise.

[Anonymous]

When you hook up you will blame the alcohol at the company party.

[Anonymous]

OP are you a man? Asking because I've never heard a man use the term "hubby" to describe another woman's husband before.

[Anonymous]

I think texting into the night about non-work things, and holding hands etc is crossing the line.

You seem to know something is wrong. You need to be a better husband. Fill your wifes cup, not your employees.

[Anonymous]

If you have to ask....

TOO late.

[Anonymous]

Holding hands? You've crossed the line. You need to change jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The holding hands…that crossed a line. And texting into the night, too.

+1
And you both probably enjoyed the rush from it—the “innocence” of the care-taking nature of it, since it sounds like she was “high” (on a work trip?—not professional) and you were serving as her “stability”—right?
But you both knewwwww.

So yeah—stop that and the late night texting.

Also if you aren’t willing to remark to your wife each time she texts you or you text her (because you realize that this would be too much because it’s so often!) then that’s your answer.
If you are willing to say “Larla wants to know when we need to meet for the conference—I’m going to text her back real quick” then that’s not crossing a line.

[Anonymous]

The being drunk or high and leaning on you/hand holding was her testing the waters. Because if you had pulled away and not allowed that, she could have easily become “embarrassed” and blamed it in her intoxicated state.
You passed her test—-but failed your wife.

Do better.

[Anonymous]

The fact that you felt the need to lay out all the detail indicates that it is more than just a friendship and that you need to be careful. Start by cutting out the texting especially at night.

[Anonymous]

Yes, definitely no more texting. You're off work at 5? You don't answer her until 9am the next day. Stop playing with fire or you'll end up divorced in short order.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The being drunk or high and leaning on you/hand holding was her testing the waters. Because if you had pulled away and not allowed that, she could have easily become “embarrassed” and blamed it in her intoxicated state.
You passed her test—-but failed your wife.

Do better.

I doubt he’s told his wife everything that he typed on his OP.

People like this get high off of lying and getting away with it.

[Anonymous]

It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

Gross. You need to respect your marriage more. "Thats the best part"??? While talking about a romantic spark with another person?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

Gross. You need to respect your marriage more. "Thats the best part"??? While talking about a romantic spark with another person?

Clearly we are both lacking something in our marriage at the moment that is fulfilled by our friendship.

[Anonymous]

Marriage is hard and sometimes boring. Rise above temptation. Unless you want a divorce. But do it with integrity. Don't bring others into your mess.

Cheating is not the way. It really hurts so many people for fleeting enjoyment and spark.