Do you think there is a such thing as marrying too fast?
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Anonymous
| If you don’t know in the first few months, it’s never gonna work out. |
Anonymous
+1. We still didn’t get engaged for 3 years (we were young) but we knew and openly discussed it pretty quickly. |
Anonymous
| Generally I think there is such a thing as going to fast, but he could get engaged and still wait awhile for marriage. Also I know a number of counter-examples. My in-laws got married after 3 months. They’ve been together about 50 years though I don’t know how happy they’ve been for the past 15 or so. Their daughter (my sister in law) had a shot-gun wedding (engaged after about 3 months, married after about 5 months) 16 years ago and they seem very happy. And a friend of mine growing up had parents who met on vacation- he moved to her area a week after vacation to her area and they were engaged soon after and married within months of meeting. They seemed happy (and she always said her parents seemed really happy) back when I knew them, and are still married. |
Anonymous
| I mean empirically yes, it’s better to know someone longer. That said, my parents were engaged 4 months after meeting, and married 6 months after that. They were happily married until my dad passed, 55 years after that. That said — they both said they were incredibly lucky that it worked out how it did, that in retrospect they didn’t know each other well enough and that neither “found out they were a serial killer” do clearly, they shared a sense of humour. |
Anonymous
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Of course there is, but regardless, you ought to MYOB.
Some people get married really fast and/or at a very young age and are still together decades later when the first one dies. Others take their time, are deliberate in getting to know someone, wait until they are older and more established, and still end up getting divorced. As with a million other factors, rushing into marriage may cause issues down the road, and it may not. Because of that, back down, it's not your place, and leave your judgment at the door when you spend time with your BIL. It really has nothing to do with you and your opinion is irrelevant. |