how long is a playdate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our play dates frequently last a whole day. Drop the kid off in the morning, pick up before dinner. We are European, however, and our kids go to an international school.

This is the OP. Same here, more or less. 6-8+ hours would be typical. People would think I was crazy or rude if I told them I'd come back or to pick up kids in 2 hours. Sounds like norms here are such that they would think I was crazy if I suggested all day!
I was surprised when we first started living abroad but now feel it's completely normal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our play dates frequently last a whole day. Drop the kid off in the morning, pick up before dinner. We are European, however, and our kids go to an international school.

What school? Maybe we should look into it!

[Anonymous]

2 hours.

When we have pushed it to 2.5, we regret it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our play dates frequently last a whole day. Drop the kid off in the morning, pick up before dinner. We are European, however, and our kids go to an international school.

Very impressive, really, but I'm confused about what your school has to do with the question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our play dates frequently last a whole day. Drop the kid off in the morning, pick up before dinner. We are European, however, and our kids go to an international school.

This is the OP. Same here, more or less. 6-8+ hours would be typical. People would think I was crazy or rude if I told them I'd come back or to pick up kids in 2 hours. Sounds like norms here are such that they would think I was crazy if I suggested all day!
I was surprised when we first started living abroad but now feel it's completely normal.

NP. 6-8 hours is like a best friend playdate. Where the relationship is like, I can bring your kids on errands, maybe they’ll stay for dinner or an impromptu sleepover.

8 hours with a random school friend sounds horrible.

[Anonymous]

Start with 1.5-2hrs

[Anonymous]

We have two kids under 10 and usually start in the 1-2 hour range to see how it goes. First playdate is usually more heavily supervised/monitored. If the kids seem to really get along and aren't destructive or bickering, we are comfortable upping the duration to 3-4 hours, but it also depends on the other family's appetite for it and if the kid has a laundry list of dietary restrictions, etc. We usually alternate sites (our house/their house), so they have to be mutually willing to host for longer periods of time. I'd be fine going beyond 4 hours with a family we knew/trusted if they were up for it, but haven't encountered that yet.

And the ideal is finding a family where both our kids can go playdate simultaneously and give us a full rather than partial break!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We do 2 hrs max - 1.5 yrs at the park.

Agree. At least an hour and a half at a park. Just don't be that parent who invites for a park playdate and then leaves in an hour, more so if the park is not nearby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our play dates frequently last a whole day. Drop the kid off in the morning, pick up before dinner. We are European, however, and our kids go to an international school.

This is the OP. Same here, more or less. 6-8+ hours would be typical. People would think I was crazy or rude if I told them I'd come back or to pick up kids in 2 hours. Sounds like norms here are such that they would think I was crazy if I suggested all day!
I was surprised when we first started living abroad but now feel it's completely normal.

NP. 6-8 hours is like a best friend playdate. Where the relationship is like, I can bring your kids on errands, maybe they’ll stay for dinner or an impromptu sleepover.

8 hours with a random school friend sounds horrible.

I also think a lot of us with pre-K/early elementary kids are somewhat rusty with play dates due to COVID. My 7 year old still hasn’t seen to inside of many of her friends’ homes (we’ve tended to do a lot of park meetups and organized outdoor sports the past couple of years). We are now open to resuming indoor play dates, but have only found 1 friend who is also ok with that.

It makes me a bit sad because at her age, there was definitely a crew of us hanging out from sun up to sun down on the weekends plus having sleepovers. I hope to get to that point, but it feels like we’re now delayed and haven’t had much experience with drop off stuff since she was in K when this all started.

[Anonymous]

We are immigrants and our kid's best friends are immigrants (from a completely different culture). Play dates start mid-afternoon, last 2-3 hours and then we all have food (usually parents come to pick up). So I'd say total 4 hours. But this is where the parents actually like each other and want to spend some time hanging out.

I don't really know how to navigate the anglo play date politics, so I just ask (if it's a drop off date): what time should we pick up Larlo? If they say something ambiguous, I say we'll be back in 1.5 hours, and then I prepare my kid that when i show up, it's time to go without whining. So far that's been fine but we haven't really deepened any friendships that way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our play dates frequently last a whole day. Drop the kid off in the morning, pick up before dinner. We are European, however, and our kids go to an international school.

Very impressive, really, but I'm confused about what your school has to do with the question.

Immigrant PP (I just posted without seeing this). The international nature of the school has everything to do with this question! Our kids is at a public school but with many international families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our play dates frequently last a whole day. Drop the kid off in the morning, pick up before dinner. We are European, however, and our kids go to an international school.

Very impressive, really, but I'm confused about what your school has to do with the question.

Immigrant PP (I just posted without seeing this). The international nature of the school has everything to do with this question! Our kids is at a public school but with many international families.

OP here- it 100% is why I ask the question, because my kids also attend an international school (overseas in our case) and I am aware that although I am from the US I have zero idea of what cultural norms are there. Case in point: a 2 hour playdate would be seriously weird and probably even rude where I am. All day is WAY more of the norm.v SOunds like that isn' the case there.

[Anonymous]

^ OP again - it sounds like you all are structuring playdates for kids 6-10? Is this really expected? I like just letting the kids play and don't find they typically need entertainment or guidance from me to do so although maybe COVID has changed that

[Anonymous]

I usually do 1.5-2 hours if it’s at someone’s house. If we are meeting up at a park with my friends, we stay until the kids get grumpy (probably like 3 hours).

[Anonymous]

2 hours