Son bummed about looking young for his age
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Anonymous
| My son will turn 15 in a few weeks. He is 5'6", which is on the shorter side, but within the normal range. However, he is upset that he looks so much younger than even peers of a similar height. He is only 115 lbs, and just looks like a skinny little kid. Many kids on his ultimate team are only an inch or two taller than him, but look more their age. Is it normal that a kid would begin gaining muscle mass so late? He eats normally and is active. I'm not sure what to tell him. |
Anonymous
| Where is in the puberty process? |
Anonymous
\ Sorry...where is he in the puberty process? They add muscle mass more toward the end. |
Anonymous
I don't know what stage he is at, but he has a fair amount of leg and underarm hair. He also has a slight mustache, but he's blonde, so doesn't shave it that often. |
Anonymous
+1 My own DS is also 15. 5’9” and about 115, in the middle of a growth spurt in terms of height. Late bloomer. A lot of boys don’t put on weight/muscle until towards the end of puberty- pretty common. But they are all different. |
Anonymous
| Some people have a "baby face" - I'm one of them but female so obviously I didn't care about it. It sounds like he's already lean so it isn't a weight thing. Is there a reason he feels self conscious about it? I wonder if something like toast masters could be a good program for him. It helps build confidence and speaking skills which is another way to "appear" older. |
Anonymous
| My kid is taller and less in weight. Don’t know where you are getting the skinny idea from. |
Anonymous
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It could just be his natural build or he may fill out later.
Strength training and eating more will probably help, but a lot of the time puberty is on its own timetable and is different for everyone- and not a lot one can do. |
Anonymous
|
btdt, myself and my two kids -- late bloomers.
On the plus side, I looked "young" until I was like 50 when menopause hit. DS is almost 19 and probably still looks like a 16/17 yr old, but he's been working out a lot to build muscle mass. |
Anonymous
|
Tell him about my 19 year old 5'5" son who weighs 100lbs and looks like he's 15.
When I showed up on my first day of being a teaching assistant as a grad student, the professor told me there was no way the students would respect me because I looked 14. We all look very young in the family. Ageism in reverse - we suffered from it when young, but less as we age. So tell him that when his peers all look like hags, he might still look youthful and he's less likely to be pushed out... if he takes care of himself (sunscreen, clean living). |
Anonymous
So is mine, but come on…you know what she means. I definitely do. A lot of boys this age are quite muscled already and have a more mature looking face (more facial hair, squared jaw etc)…..they look older. |
Anonymous
| This can be perfectly normal. My husband, and son, were both late "growers". My husband was the smallest until his senior year of high school (he continued to grow in college and broke 6 feet his freshman year of college). My son is following his pattern. That being said, at almost 52, my husband still looks young and doesn't have any gray hair! I jokingly call him my trophy husband. He once commented that he was in such a hurry to look older when we was younger, but is loving looking younger than most of the people in his position now. I know that your son might not want to hear it now, but it can be a blessing down the road! Let him know that he will change a great deal between now and college! |
Anonymous
| My son is younger but taller and a lot heavier than yours and doesn’t have any noticeable muscle mass either despite playing a few sports. |
Anonymous
| There's nothing to say. Someone will always be tallest and shortest and skinniest and fattest and oldest and youngest, etc. He needs to make peace with his body and figure out himself that there's so much more to him than just how he looks. |
Anonymous
| Jeez, my son would love to be 115 lbs and he is taller. Just doesn’t gain weight much. |