Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is our first year with an au pair. Has it been amazing? Nope, but it's a lot better than the our previous nanny situation. Our previous nanny was excellent with the kids and household chores but absolutely gouged us. Our current au pair is just ok but the benefits FAR outweigh the cons and again, I'll never go back to a nanny. I'm sorry to hear so manny others have had bad experiences. We definitely have had a few if you are not happy by all means go elsewhere conversations but all and all I think the au pair program is perfect for us. Will be even better when my youngest is in school next fall. Good luck!

This post has so many typos(?), it's confusing. Could you please fix it, PP?

No typos Wacko ease up its just an anonymous forum chill

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one knows for sure what the success/failure rate is, not to mention the consequences of unstable care to the children.

Agree.

+1,000,000

Anonymous wrote:This is our first year with an au pair. Has it been amazing? Nope, but it's a lot better than the our previous nanny situation. Our previous nanny was excellent with the kids and household chores but absolutely gouged us. Our current au pair is just ok but the benefits FAR outweigh the cons and again, I'll never go back to a nanny. I'm sorry to hear so manny others have had bad experiences. We definitely have had a few if you are not happy by all means go elsewhere conversations but all and all I think the au pair program is perfect for us. Will be even better when my youngest is in school next fall. Good luck!

This post has so many typos(?), it's confusing. Could you please fix it, PP?

I can see how you I came across that way and yes that's partly it but I really like a lot about the program- ap is ver good with my youngest, reliable, and we have enjoyed the cultural exchange much more than antcipated.

Anonymous wrote:This is our first year with an au pair. Has it been amazing? Nope, but it's a lot better than the our previous nanny situation. Our previous nanny was excellent with the kids and household chores but absolutely gouged us. Our current au pair is just ok but the benefits FAR outweigh the cons and again, I'll never go back to a nanny. I'm sorry to hear so manny others have had bad experiences. We definitely have had a few if you are not happy by all means go elsewhere conversations but all and all I think the au pair program is perfect for us. Will be even better when my youngest is in school next fall. Good luck!

Sounds like the cheap price is the only thing you love so much about the AP. Sorry to hear that.

This is our first year with an au pair. Has it been amazing? Nope, but it's a lot better than the our previous nanny situation. Our previous nanny was excellent with the kids and household chores but absolutely gouged us. Our current au pair is just ok but the benefits FAR outweigh the cons and again, I'll never go back to a nanny. I'm sorry to hear so manny others have had bad experiences. We definitely have had a few if you are not happy by all means go elsewhere conversations but all and all I think the au pair program is perfect for us. Will be even better when my youngest is in school next fall. Good luck!

Funny to see this brought up again. I'm the OP of this thread from 2+ years ago. We did go on to have another au pair. She was a rematch and was fantastic. We had another one after her who also left to return home after not even a month. The common thread between our two homesick au pairs who left were mothers who were begging them to come home at the slightest discomfort. After her, we had one more absolute rockstar. So we had three amazing au pairs and three terrible.

We quit the program last fall and haven't missed it for a second. We now do a combo of schedule staggering and before/after care, which has worked great. We're saving $20k a year and massive amounts of headache. Even the great ones were a huge drain on me emotionally. I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. Obviously the program was not a good fit for me.

Anonymous wrote:No one knows for sure what the success/failure rate is, not to mention the consequences of unstable care to the children.

Agree.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So sorry for those who have had bad experiences. Just heard about an AP in our cluster, arrived in November, homesick, had plans from get-go to go home for Christmas. Then told the family she wouldn't be back afterward. Then told the family on a Saturday (with no notice) that she's moved her flight up and was leaving the following Monday! I can hardly believe the irresponsibility!

That's awful! I wonder if many au pairs leave from homesickness right from the start. Did you hear about this from your own au pair? I often wonder what the real story is when I hear bad stories like this.

OMG this is me!!! How did you hear about this? It was really terrible and totally out of the blue.

Maybe the au pairs want to give it a try, and see how you turn out. Shouldn't it be an equal two-way street? How many refs did you give her for yourselves?

We gave her two actually - both of our previous au pairs both of whom stayed for the year and who we're still in touch with today. We just got Christmas presents for the kids from our second Au pair. Our LCC said our au pair that left didn't have a single complaint about us, so in a only assume it was pure homesickness. It was really disruptive to have such short notice and the kids were really upset. I hate to out myself on DCUM, but I was so shocked to read our story! Dying to know who posted that and how they heard.

Which story?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So sorry for those who have had bad experiences. Just heard about an AP in our cluster, arrived in November, homesick, had plans from get-go to go home for Christmas. Then told the family she wouldn't be back afterward. Then told the family on a Saturday (with no notice) that she's moved her flight up and was leaving the following Monday! I can hardly believe the irresponsibility!

That's awful! I wonder if many au pairs leave from homesickness right from the start. Did you hear about this from your own au pair? I often wonder what the real story is when I hear bad stories like this.

OMG this is me!!! How did you hear about this? It was really terrible and totally out of the blue.

Maybe the au pairs want to give it a try, and see how you turn out. Shouldn't it be an equal two-way street? How many refs did you give her for yourselves?

We gave her two actually - both of our previous au pairs both of whom stayed for the year and who we're still in touch with today. We just got Christmas presents for the kids from our second Au pair. Our LCC said our au pair that left didn't have a single complaint about us, so in a only assume it was pure homesickness. It was really disruptive to have such short notice and the kids were really upset. I hate to out myself on DCUM, but I was so shocked to read our story! Dying to know who posted that and how they heard.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So sorry for those who have had bad experiences. Just heard about an AP in our cluster, arrived in November, homesick, had plans from get-go to go home for Christmas. Then told the family she wouldn't be back afterward. Then told the family on a Saturday (with no notice) that she's moved her flight up and was leaving the following Monday! I can hardly believe the irresponsibility!

That's awful! I wonder if many au pairs leave from homesickness right from the start. Did you hear about this from your own au pair? I often wonder what the real story is when I hear bad stories like this.

OMG this is me!!! How did you hear about this? It was really terrible and totally out of the blue.

Maybe the au pairs want to give it a try, and see how you turn out. Shouldn't it be an equal two-way street? How many refs did you give her for yourselves?

For various reasons an AP wouldn't work for us but we need morning and afternoon care for our two school age kids. We decided to go with two different people since we couldn't find one person to do both jobs. Finding an afternoon nanny in the Bethesda area isn't too bad because of the local colleges/universities. For the morning nanny we decided to look for a nanny/housekeeper who could get the kids off to school and clean, do laundry, errands, etc. to justify enough hours a day to make it worth her while. We LOVE our morning person. She makes our life much easier and she has the flexibility to take online classes so it is a win-win. Between our afternoon and morning nanny one of them can cover the random days off. This solution was cheaper than a nanny and has worked so far (knock on wood....).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So sorry for those who have had bad experiences. Just heard about an AP in our cluster, arrived in November, homesick, had plans from get-go to go home for Christmas. Then told the family she wouldn't be back afterward. Then told the family on a Saturday (with no notice) that she's moved her flight up and was leaving the following Monday! I can hardly believe the irresponsibility!

That's awful! I wonder if many au pairs leave from homesickness right from the start. Did you hear about this from your own au pair? I often wonder what the real story is when I hear bad stories like this.

OMG this is me!!! How did you hear about this? It was really terrible and totally out of the blue.

Actually, the big plans usually have included traveling and learning English/studying. But they haven't been generalities with these APs: They have been very specific and included high-set goals. Two of the three had already picked out the courses they wanted to take prior to coming here and used the opportunity to take classes here to study new areas that they thought they might be interested in but hadn't studied before, and each went back to Germany with different plans for her university studies than she had come here with, as a result of the coursework she took here. All three had big ambitions for travel including specific cities, specific museums, and even specific art collections. For the two 19 year old Germans, they had clear and extensive lists about where they wanted to travel to and some idea of when they wanted to go. With clear, intentional, thought-out plans like these, on top of the very clear intention to use the year to gain independence and come into their own as young women, they weren't going to let a little homesickness at Christmas get in their way.

So far we are three for three using high academic achievement, ambition, and well-formulated goals among our criteria for matching. This is a much better ratio than we had in our first four years of hosting, when we used age (23+) and other very childcare-specific criteria for our selection and ended up with APs that maybe had better "experience with children" but maybe didn't see aupairing as just a year's job so maybe didn't have the quick-study/going-to-make-the-most-of-this-one-great-year-of-my-life attitude that we have found works for our family (but certainly not all) so well.

Great perspectives - thank you. What kind of big plans? I don't think I've seen any applications with big plans for the year beyond traveling and learning English.