Anonymous wrote:We are on our first au pair (in the extension year). So many incidentals I didn’t consider - the minor car accidents, the extra car maintenance, the household repairs to things she’s broken, the Xmas gifts, stocking, etc., the birthday party we threw her, the extra food, the extra wine, gas for the car. Adding an adult meal every time we go out to eat, higher utilities bills (she “didn’t realize” to close her windows in the winter, wtf). Anytime you travel, expect to get another hotel room, all her meals, etc.

I sound so miserly and penny pinching and I’m not trying to. At the end of the day I am glad she’s here and I’m happy to pay all of the above. It’s just such a difference from a nanny where you cut the paycheck and you’re done. While I have no doubt we paid more overall with our nanny, so you could argue that the au pair is a “better financial choice”, I preferred the simple payment arrangement of a nanny versus the messy au pair arrangement where you really don’t know what costs you’re incurring until it’s said and done.

All of the above. The difference is that we love the program. We love the energy that these young women bring to the house. We love the long-lasting connections. We are in touch with all four of our former au pairs. We hope to maintain the relationships forever. These young women adore our children. And we adore them.

Have had APs for 10 years. No rematches --

You don't need to buy her wine
You don't need to take her on vacation -- frankly, APs usually don't want to go and enjoy the time off
You don't need to take her out to your dinners

We are on our first au pair (in the extension year). So many incidentals I didn’t consider - the minor car accidents, the extra car maintenance, the household repairs to things she’s broken, the Xmas gifts, stocking, etc., the birthday party we threw her, the extra food, the extra wine, gas for the car. Adding an adult meal every time we go out to eat, higher utilities bills (she “didn’t realize” to close her windows in the winter, wtf). Anytime you travel, expect to get another hotel room, all her meals, etc.

I sound so miserly and penny pinching and I’m not trying to. At the end of the day I am glad she’s here and I’m happy to pay all of the above. It’s just such a difference from a nanny where you cut the paycheck and you’re done. While I have no doubt we paid more overall with our nanny, so you could argue that the au pair is a “better financial choice”, I preferred the simple payment arrangement of a nanny versus the messy au pair arrangement where you really don’t know what costs you’re incurring until it’s said and done.