Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Believe it or not some parents spoiled babies
Rotten don’t want them to cry So you have to pick babies up rock then to sleep
And want to be in a share not thinking about the other selfish
I would go crazy too
You cannot spoil a baby.
You can absolutely reinforce negative coping mechanisms and teach babies habits that are incompatible with healthy sleep, resulting in overtired, emotionally sensitive, clingy, grouchy, SPOILED babies! She said they are crawling so these are not newborns who can be held all day. They should be able to be put down but if the parents pick them up the second they fuss about anything, they will whine and cry ALL day because lack of emotional resilience is rewarded.
No, you can't spoil a baby and its neglectful to ignore them. You are paid to provide full time care and that is your only responsibility. My kids didn't whine, cry or fuss all day from being held and attended to and if the ones you work with do, maybe it is your neglect all day that the parents then have to make up for.
I find it hard to believe you are a nanny. Maybe an attachment parent? No one is talking about ignoring children. We are talking about responding to the whole child in a way that allows them to sleep well and develop basic emotional coping strategies. Not every problem a baby has is best solved by immediately picking them up and carrying them around. Maybe they are frustrated because they want to grab a toy that is just out of reach. Maybe they are impatient and want another bite of food NOW. Maybe they are angry that you wouldn’t let them eat the trash they found on the carpet. Maybe they are scared because they heard a loud roll of thunder. Babies are perfectly capable of experiencing the full gamut of human emotions, and therefore they need a dynamic response that encourages and models pro-social behavior. Crying is communication, and a loving, responsive caregiver engages with that communication, even if it means that the baby cries for a minute or two, instead of shutting down communication and learning by scooping the baby up and distracting them from the problem.
She is not describing parents who want her to engage more. She is describing parents who cannot tolerate the sounds of babies who are experiencing any emotion other than happiness and that is not healthy or helpful.
You are being paid to be attentive to a child. I am far from an attachment parent but what you/they are posting is neglectful. No trash should be on the floor. Your only job is to feed that kid there is no excuse the baby is waiting.
There are two babies. Either twins or a nanny share. Even with one baby, sometimes they will need to wait a moment while you get more food, warm a bottle, open a pack of diapers, etc. etc. etc. And even if you could make sure that they never experienced a single moment of waiting for anything, do you really truly believe that is better for a baby? I don’t. I am a seasoned twin nanny and I tandem babywear, do gentle sleep conditioning, apply a reggio-inspired positive-discipline approach with toddlers and up. I am not some hard-line authoritarian. But every bit of research I have ever seen into child development says that it is safe, appropriate and healthy for babies and young children to experience both positive AND negative emotions and that the caregivers job is not to distract from negative emotions but to teach the child to communicate, process and move forward from negative emotions. That requires constant, loving presence and focused attention, but it does not mean that the babies never cry. Scooping a baby up and distracting them until they smile again is the easy way out in the short-term, and unhealthy in the long term.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Believe it or not some parents spoiled babies
Rotten don’t want them to cry So you have to pick babies up rock then to sleep
And want to be in a share not thinking about the other selfish
I would go crazy too
You cannot spoil a baby.
You can absolutely reinforce negative coping mechanisms and teach babies habits that are incompatible with healthy sleep, resulting in overtired, emotionally sensitive, clingy, grouchy, SPOILED babies! She said they are crawling so these are not newborns who can be held all day. They should be able to be put down but if the parents pick them up the second they fuss about anything, they will whine and cry ALL day because lack of emotional resilience is rewarded.
No, you can't spoil a baby and its neglectful to ignore them. You are paid to provide full time care and that is your only responsibility. My kids didn't whine, cry or fuss all day from being held and attended to and if the ones you work with do, maybe it is your neglect all day that the parents then have to make up for.
I find it hard to believe you are a nanny. Maybe an attachment parent? No one is talking about ignoring children. We are talking about responding to the whole child in a way that allows them to sleep well and develop basic emotional coping strategies. Not every problem a baby has is best solved by immediately picking them up and carrying them around. Maybe they are frustrated because they want to grab a toy that is just out of reach. Maybe they are impatient and want another bite of food NOW. Maybe they are angry that you wouldn’t let them eat the trash they found on the carpet. Maybe they are scared because they heard a loud roll of thunder. Babies are perfectly capable of experiencing the full gamut of human emotions, and therefore they need a dynamic response that encourages and models pro-social behavior. Crying is communication, and a loving, responsive caregiver engages with that communication, even if it means that the baby cries for a minute or two, instead of shutting down communication and learning by scooping the baby up and distracting them from the problem.
She is not describing parents who want her to engage more. She is describing parents who cannot tolerate the sounds of babies who are experiencing any emotion other than happiness and that is not healthy or helpful.
You are being paid to be attentive to a child. I am far from an attachment parent but what you/they are posting is neglectful. No trash should be on the floor. Your only job is to feed that kid there is no excuse the baby is waiting.
Anonymous wrote:Quit if you want. But I think you’ll problems finding a new job. Do you think some wealthy family is going to be impressed you quit your last job because the parents were working from home, the house was too small, and you were upset the parents were picking up crying babies?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Quit if you want. But I think you’ll problems finding a new job. Do you think some wealthy family is going to be impressed you quit your last job because the parents were working from home, the house was too small, and you were upset the parents were picking up crying babies?
If she has years of experience and positive references, she can find a new job without even using them as a reference. She can say she is leaving them because “our discipline style wasn’t a good fit.”
Its a huge red flag if a caretaker says you cannot be around. That's 101 for child abuse.
Don't be ridiculous with your comment. A nanny who want to work in a professional way; don't need to being micromanaged. Since she will have all the experience working with children. And a nanny with parents working from Home no only in the same House; working in a "same room" this is a nightmare. You mom that you are supposed to know Everything.. how would you feel if you would be working 9 or 10 hrs a day working with your boss Face to face.. watching you even when you want to wipe your nose? Clearly you must be a mom who don't have respect and boundaries to others. A nice Nanny family will make you feel conmofable and will give you your space and also being the boss when nanny is in charge of their kiddos. It doesn't matter if Parents are working from Home or not. It's easy to know what kind of Family (mom)
you are. Too bad.
I have worked as a nanny, day care provider and many other helping jobs. And, yes, I've worked very closely many times with my supervisor. These are NOT your kids. You are paid to do a job. The parents have a right to say how their kids are taken care of. Child abuse and neglect is a very serious concern.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Quit if you want. But I think you’ll problems finding a new job. Do you think some wealthy family is going to be impressed you quit your last job because the parents were working from home, the house was too small, and you were upset the parents were picking up crying babies?
If she has years of experience and positive references, she can find a new job without even using them as a reference. She can say she is leaving them because “our discipline style wasn’t a good fit.”
Its a huge red flag if a caretaker says you cannot be around. That's 101 for child abuse.
Don't be ridiculous with your comment. A nanny who want to work in a professional way; don't need to being micromanaged. Since she will have all the experience working with children. And a nanny with parents working from Home no only in the same House; working in a "same room" this is a nightmare. You mom that you are supposed to know Everything.. how would you feel if you would be working 9 or 10 hrs a day working with your boss Face to face.. watching you even when you want to wipe your nose? Clearly you must be a mom who don't have respect and boundaries to others. A nice Nanny family will make you feel conmofable and will give you your space and also being the boss when nanny is in charge of their kiddos. It doesn't matter if Parents are working from Home or not. It's easy to know what kind of Family (mom)
you are. Too bad.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Quit if you want. But I think you’ll problems finding a new job. Do you think some wealthy family is going to be impressed you quit your last job because the parents were working from home, the house was too small, and you were upset the parents were picking up crying babies?
If she has years of experience and positive references, she can find a new job without even using them as a reference. She can say she is leaving them because “our discipline style wasn’t a good fit.”
Its a huge red flag if a caretaker says you cannot be around. That's 101 for child abuse.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I’m so tired of being around micromanaging parents all day. I work for two families who are both at home in small CONDOS. They refuse to find a workspace outside the home, so they work in the living room/kitchen combo where I also have to play with the kids (unless we can hole up in one of their tiny bedrooms all day). That means there are THREE ADULTS and two crawling infants in a 900-1100sq ft apartment all day. Some days I sit on the floor while the kids are napping because there is no where else to sit when everyone is working. The parents take calls and meetings all day, so I have to hear everything and do my best to keep the kids quiet all day. As a result, they’re the most spoiled and over-held babies I’ve ever worked with. It’s really a shame because I’ve been doing this for 10 years and love my job. Now, every morning I cry as I walk out the door to head to this hell hole.
I have no freedom to discipline the children (I use reinforcement discipline), and whenever any of them cry their parents rush over to them or into the bedroom we’re stuck in to pick them up. This is TERRIBLE for their emotional development. They’ve never learned to self soothe and are both terrible ballers due to their parents backwards ways and thoughts on naps. Usually I would be able to correct these bad habits and then provide feedback to the parents on why my methods are most beneficial, but now I can’t do that because they are always around and seem dead set on their backwards thoughts. Tried discussing an alternate method with one of the dads once, and he shot me down (even though I have corrected sleeping issues before) so I left it alone. We spend at least 6 hours of my 9 hour shift outside wandering around aimlessly because there is nothing to do and no activities due to Covid. I just have to stay out of the house for my own stability. Even if it’s hot, we go sit outside.
I’m SO emotionally battered and I feel bad because I am a great nanny with solid references and have always excelled at my job. These parents are happy with me and praise me often, but I am MISERABLE.
Does anyone else feel this way? How have you gotten out of this funk? I think about quitting every day.
Seriously, you need a new job in a different profession. You don't just let babies cry. Your job is to nurture and comfort them. And, this is their home and they are working from home. You are inappropriate to tell them they need to work elsewhere especially with the virus. Please quit. These kids deserve better care.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Believe it or not some parents spoiled babies
Rotten don’t want them to cry So you have to pick babies up rock then to sleep
And want to be in a share not thinking about the other selfish
I would go crazy too
You cannot spoil a baby.
You can absolutely reinforce negative coping mechanisms and teach babies habits that are incompatible with healthy sleep, resulting in overtired, emotionally sensitive, clingy, grouchy, SPOILED babies! She said they are crawling so these are not newborns who can be held all day. They should be able to be put down but if the parents pick them up the second they fuss about anything, they will whine and cry ALL day because lack of emotional resilience is rewarded.
No, you can't spoil a baby and its neglectful to ignore them. You are paid to provide full time care and that is your only responsibility. My kids didn't whine, cry or fuss all day from being held and attended to and if the ones you work with do, maybe it is your neglect all day that the parents then have to make up for.
I find it hard to believe you are a nanny. Maybe an attachment parent? No one is talking about ignoring children. We are talking about responding to the whole child in a way that allows them to sleep well and develop basic emotional coping strategies. Not every problem a baby has is best solved by immediately picking them up and carrying them around. Maybe they are frustrated because they want to grab a toy that is just out of reach. Maybe they are impatient and want another bite of food NOW. Maybe they are angry that you wouldn’t let them eat the trash they found on the carpet. Maybe they are scared because they heard a loud roll of thunder. Babies are perfectly capable of experiencing the full gamut of human emotions, and therefore they need a dynamic response that encourages and models pro-social behavior. Crying is communication, and a loving, responsive caregiver engages with that communication, even if it means that the baby cries for a minute or two, instead of shutting down communication and learning by scooping the baby up and distracting them from the problem.
She is not describing parents who want her to engage more. She is describing parents who cannot tolerate the sounds of babies who are experiencing any emotion other than happiness and that is not healthy or helpful.
You are being paid to be attentive to a child. I am far from an attachment parent but what you/they are posting is neglectful. No trash should be on the floor. Your only job is to feed that kid there is no excuse the baby is waiting.
Anonymous wrote:Quit if you want. But I think you’ll problems finding a new job. Do you think some wealthy family is going to be impressed you quit your last job because the parents were working from home, the house was too small, and you were upset the parents were picking up crying babies?
Anonymous wrote:Quit if you want. But I think you’ll problems finding a new job. Do you think some wealthy family is going to be impressed you quit your last job because the parents were working from home, the house was too small, and you were upset the parents were picking up crying babies?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Quit if you want. But I think you’ll problems finding a new job. Do you think some wealthy family is going to be impressed you quit your last job because the parents were working from home, the house was too small, and you were upset the parents were picking up crying babies?
If she has years of experience and positive references, she can find a new job without even using them as a reference. She can say she is leaving them because “our discipline style wasn’t a good fit.”