Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:pp to me you sound like you live through your family's life and their kids instead of enjoying having your own family. Having your own child is not the same as taking care of someone else's. It is main joy of this life.

To you, perhaps. However, you devaluing the lives of empty nesters, childless people, etc. Mind your own business.

*child-free*, please!


-- PP nanny

My cousin is one of those well-educated nannies (B.S. in Child Psychology) and she told me the neighbors of her nanny family have been secretly trying to "buy her away" from her current family, offering more perks, money, etc. Golden times for nannies. More power to them.

Anonymous wrote:My friend has a college degree and lives alone and parents are offering her up to $40 an hour. Granted, she knows these jobs are temporary and doesn’t want to leave her current family but still... Life in the time of corona is bizarre.

It’s true. I’ve always gotten a good number of inquiries but lately I’ve been getting three to four every day.

Anonymous wrote:pp to me you sound like you live through your family's life and their kids instead of enjoying having your own family. Having your own child is not the same as taking care of someone else's. It is main joy of this life.

I know you wish that were true, PP. The fact is - it is not true. Neither PP nor any other nanny lives through their charges or employers life nor would choose to. You’ve come up with that rationalization to assuage your own feelings of inadequacy and fear your children get more from their nanny than you.

Anonymous wrote:pp to me you sound like you live through your family's life and their kids instead of enjoying having your own family. Having your own child is not the same as taking care of someone else's. It is main joy of this life.

First, if it was such a joy to have your own child, why didn’t you stay home and take care of the child yourself?

Second, all the single nannies I know raised their own children before becoming nannies.

Third, what does “living through your family’s life” mean? What family? The nanny employer’s family or the nanny’s family.

Anonymous wrote:pp to me you sound like you live through your family's life and their kids instead of enjoying having your own family. Having your own child is not the same as taking care of someone else's. It is main joy of this life.

To you, perhaps. However, you devaluing the lives of empty nesters, childless people, etc. Mind your own business.

pp to me you sound like you live through your family's life and their kids instead of enjoying having your own family. Having your own child is not the same as taking care of someone else's. It is main joy of this life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:well, aren't you ladies ever going to get married? Where I am from, the women living alone after certain age are pitied by general population.

I do not know where you live PP, but no one should feel undervalued just because they live alone.

For some, it can be a choice for them.

Not having a romantic partner in ones life does not invalidate a person’s worth.
It is beliefs such as this that can keep people in unhappy relationships.

WTF?? Who says living alone means you don't have a romantic partner? I live alone and have no plans to change it. I also have a romantic partner who I see 2-x per week. We seem to be more content than the married people we know. It's a treat and a date to see him on Wednesday evening for a nice dinner out, and all-day Saturday for soccer or cycling or some other outdoor activity. Not a drudge or an expectation, no honey-do list presented him each week. As I write this the happier I am about my choices.

--late 30s nanny to 3 kids, well-paid, I own a condo in downtown Silver Spring (and similar to a PP above, I have an Associates degree in Early Childhood Education from Montgomery College), yes we are gold these days -- I have gotten a generous weekly bonus the past 2 months so am ahead on my mortgage

Old and alone? Pity?

I am a "mature" nanny at 45 years old. I have been with 3 families since I started nannying at age 20. I have a 2-year degree (Associates) in Psychology from Montgomery College. After observing marriages and divorces over the course of my 25-year career I can assure you I never want to get married. And after taking care of babies and kids 8-10 hours day, I have no desire to go home after work and take care of any more. I have the best of all worlds: I love kids and get to "raise" them, but I don't have to send them to college or pay for their weddings and so on. I'm like the fun aunt rather than the worried, nagging mom.

I have had to stop seeing my weekend lover since the Covid thing started, but that's ok. I'll see him again -- or someone else -- when this is over.

Oh -- and I've just gotten a nice raise so my current family is assured I will not move on --because yes, we are gold in this situation.

signed -- Single nanny, lives alone in my cute, large, affordable, sunny basement apartment, happy, content, need i go on?

Anonymous wrote:My sister is a retired teacher who has been with a family as a nanny for 5 years (taught age 22-52, retired from school, now a nanny from 53-58). She has her masters in Elementary Ed K-8 and endorsements in Reading and Special Education. She lives "alone" with her husband. Her employers have offered her a significant increase -- from her normal $35 per hour to $40) to stay and care for / home-school the kids who are 2, 4, 7. She was going to fully retire after 5 years with the family and they knew this in advance. (Pius they had that last baby unexpectedly and really needed her to stay.) Since there is really nothing else to do right now, she agreed. She has increased her hours from 40-50 since the employers are essential workers (hospital physicians) and they too are working longer hours. At 10 hours per day they all agreed she would be getting overtime. This is in the greater LA area.

The family has a live-in housekeeper so they do not have to worry about that too much.

California guarantees overtime for over 9 hours per day.

My sister is a retired teacher who has been with a family as a nanny for 5 years (taught age 22-52, retired from school, now a nanny from 53-58). She has her masters in Elementary Ed K-8 and endorsements in Reading and Special Education. She lives "alone" with her husband. Her employers have offered her a significant increase -- from her normal $35 per hour to $40) to stay and care for / home-school the kids who are 2, 4, 7. She was going to fully retire after 5 years with the family and they knew this in advance. (Pius they had that last baby unexpectedly and really needed her to stay.) Since there is really nothing else to do right now, she agreed. She has increased her hours from 40-50 since the employers are essential workers (hospital physicians) and they too are working longer hours. At 10 hours per day they all agreed she would be getting overtime. This is in the greater LA area.

The family has a live-in housekeeper so they do not have to worry about that too much.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:those poor lonely nannies, I feel so sorry for them, it;s horrible to be living alone under quarantine.

I am a nanny; I live alone and am neither lonely nor poor. It’s great to still be able to work. I miss friends and family but it’s really kind of peaceful.

Don't feel sorry for us. I am also a single nanny and live by myself. I have my own space. I love to have my privacy without roomates. I am still having great comunicacion Face time with family and friends. For now it's working well. My priority for now us protect to myself and protect my nanny family. I am sure no so far things will get to normal or al least will be able to see people outside; family, friends in open space. keeping all our social distance. You don't know how many nanny will be wishing to live by their own and they can not afford it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend has a college degree and lives alone and parents are offering her up to $40 an hour. Granted, she knows these jobs are temporary and doesn’t want to leave her current family but still... Life in the time of corona is bizarre.

You need at least $40/hr to afford a mortgage payment by yourself in this area.

I made 30k when I was a Nanny and bought a Condo in a nice part of Loudoun County they their first time homebuyer program. This is where developers provide some affordable housing in an agreement with the county on development. I was single and lives quite happily on my low income.

Anonymous wrote:My friend has a college degree and lives alone and parents are offering her up to $40 an hour. Granted, she knows these jobs are temporary and doesn’t want to leave her current family but still... Life in the time of corona is bizarre.

You need at least $40/hr to afford a mortgage payment by yourself in this area.

Anonymous wrote:That’s so third world. Women in the US have choice, freedom and independence.

And often, too much of it. I hope they are going be as happy about their choices 10-15 yrs from now. What I see that in reality after being "happy and free" for so many decades they end up on TTC threads at age of 45. This is said with no malice, just with a bit more understanding what life is all about.

And plenty of others are happy being single for their whole lives. Three of my aunts, 2 of my cousins, and I are all happily single. My sister and several others are divorced and childless, much happier now than when they were married.

I have other relatives that lead happy, healthy lives as a parent and/or spouse. Other relatives are married and/or a parent, yet they are miserable.

Happiness is found by finding peace and contentment in your circumstance, no matter what it may be. Trying to find happiness by marrying someone or having a child is setting yourself (and them) for discontent, because nobody else can magically make you happy.