Anonymous
Post 01/07/2019 21:25     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:They sound like insufferable snobs and you will be "the help.". I would pass.


Lol
You ARE the help.


You missed the reference, Dear, and no one uses “lol” except the elderly.
Anonymous
Post 01/07/2019 20:57     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
I knew a very well off family that had a nanny. They had a uniform for the nanny because they entertained people during the day that the nanny came in contact with, like the governor, and they wanted to make sure she looked presentable at all times.
Anonymous
Post 01/07/2019 18:48     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Anonymous wrote:What did you decide, OP?


Op here.

Yes, I did accept it today! I didn't actually ask to speak to the previous nanny (I know, I know), but it felt like the right move. If it isn't a good fit I can always move on.


Also,

Anonymous wrote:OP, do you report to a household manager or the parents?


They do have a House Manager, but I report directly to the parents because they say they don't want another intermediary between them and their kids. Most of the other staff (the housekeepers and the chef) report to that person. I think the PA might also report directly to the parents, but I'm not 100% sure how it works yet.
Anonymous
Post 01/07/2019 18:29     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Anonymous wrote:They sound like insufferable snobs and you will be "the help.". I would pass.


Lol
You ARE the help.
Anonymous
Post 01/07/2019 17:46     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
OP, do you report to a household manager or the parents?
Anonymous
Post 01/07/2019 16:34     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Hello and happy New Year to all!

So, I have been interviewing for jobs recently because some lifestyle changes will mean my NF can no longer keep me on full time, which I need. I recently interviewed for a position that seems tempting. It pays really well, provides great benefits, the kids seem great, and the family seems good. The only issue is that it's a somewhat...different environment than I'm used to working in. It's a very wealthy family who have other staff working in the home including housekeepers and a chef. And, here's the thing: they require all staff, including me if I take the job, to wear uniforms and the other staff refer to DB and MB as Mr. and Mrs. So and So. They refer to it as a "formal home." This all seems very strange and alien to me, but again, it does pay very well. Is this a deal breaker or too weird or would you consider it?


You are very picky for having a blue collar job. Suck it up and enjoy the fact you have a job in the first place. There are a lot of nannies here that are struggling and have less.



Blue collar workers are the most in demand. I have never gone one full week of looking for a new nanny position without several offers. OP can be as chooses as she likes.
Anonymous
Post 01/07/2019 16:28     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
What did you decide, OP?
Anonymous
Post 01/07/2019 09:18     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Hello and happy New Year to all!

So, I have been interviewing for jobs recently because some lifestyle changes will mean my NF can no longer keep me on full time, which I need. I recently interviewed for a position that seems tempting. It pays really well, provides great benefits, the kids seem great, and the family seems good. The only issue is that it's a somewhat...different environment than I'm used to working in. It's a very wealthy family who have other staff working in the home including housekeepers and a chef. And, here's the thing: they require all staff, including me if I take the job, to wear uniforms and the other staff refer to DB and MB as Mr. and Mrs. So and So. They refer to it as a "formal home." This all seems very strange and alien to me, but again, it does pay very well. Is this a deal breaker or too weird or would you consider it?


You are very picky for having a blue collar job. Suck it up and enjoy the fact you have a job in the first place. There are a lot of nannies here that are struggling and have less.


Then they need to expand their experience and stop taking just any position. As a nanny, I’m not struggling and have no trouble finding a postion that is a fit. Maybe you should suck it up, get some standards and an education.
Anonymous
Post 01/07/2019 02:50     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, you are absolutely entitled to ask for their references (i.e. to speak to one or two former nannies). Just do so in a very polite way and couch it in absolute enthusiasm for the job, their family, opportunity, etc. I would send them an email and be very, very polite, but I would not shy away from getting more information if you need it to make the decision.

The uniform sounds fine to me... (The family crest is kind of chuckle-worthy in this day, age, and multicultural environment, but they could still be wonderful people.)

-MB (whose son's nanny definitely spoke to his former nanny, just as I did with her former employer)


OP here.

I always feel kind of uncomfortable asking for things like that (speaking to the former nanny) like they might withdraw their offer or something if I do. It's just awkward and hard to negotiate those kind of things when you feel like you have less leverage.

Ha and with the uniform I'm not sure if it's a family crest. I didn't really look at it that closely, but it's some kind of household related logo.


The fact that this is a very high paying job with household staff that will make your life easy, but yet have had not just another nanny, but nannies is a HUGE HUGE red flag. People will put up with a lot of garbage for high pay and benefits. You have nothing to lose asking to talk to the former nannies. If they rescind the offer of over that you've dodged a bullet.
Anonymous
Post 01/06/2019 20:08     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Anonymous wrote:OP, you are absolutely entitled to ask for their references (i.e. to speak to one or two former nannies). Just do so in a very polite way and couch it in absolute enthusiasm for the job, their family, opportunity, etc. I would send them an email and be very, very polite, but I would not shy away from getting more information if you need it to make the decision.

The uniform sounds fine to me... (The family crest is kind of chuckle-worthy in this day, age, and multicultural environment, but they could still be wonderful people.)

-MB (whose son's nanny definitely spoke to his former nanny, just as I did with her former employer)


OP here.

I always feel kind of uncomfortable asking for things like that (speaking to the former nanny) like they might withdraw their offer or something if I do. It's just awkward and hard to negotiate those kind of things when you feel like you have less leverage.

Ha and with the uniform I'm not sure if it's a family crest. I didn't really look at it that closely, but it's some kind of household related logo.
Anonymous
Post 01/06/2019 17:56     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
OP, you are absolutely entitled to ask for their references (i.e. to speak to one or two former nannies). Just do so in a very polite way and couch it in absolute enthusiasm for the job, their family, opportunity, etc. I would send them an email and be very, very polite, but I would not shy away from getting more information if you need it to make the decision.

The uniform sounds fine to me... (The family crest is kind of chuckle-worthy in this day, age, and multicultural environment, but they could still be wonderful people.)

-MB (whose son's nanny definitely spoke to his former nanny, just as I did with her former employer)
Anonymous
Post 01/06/2019 12:09     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Sounds like a great job.

A family that can actually afford a nanny is great. Wearing a uniform? I would get over that quickly.
Sir and Ma'am or Mr. And Mrs. It's formal and polite. Maybe as you get to know the family they will switch to first names.
Anyway go for it !
Anonymous
Post 01/06/2019 11:09     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
How is she being picky? Just because a job is offered, she doesn’t have to accept it.
Anonymous
Post 01/06/2019 11:07     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Anonymous wrote:Hello and happy New Year to all!

So, I have been interviewing for jobs recently because some lifestyle changes will mean my NF can no longer keep me on full time, which I need. I recently interviewed for a position that seems tempting. It pays really well, provides great benefits, the kids seem great, and the family seems good. The only issue is that it's a somewhat...different environment than I'm used to working in. It's a very wealthy family who have other staff working in the home including housekeepers and a chef. And, here's the thing: they require all staff, including me if I take the job, to wear uniforms and the other staff refer to DB and MB as Mr. and Mrs. So and So. They refer to it as a "formal home." This all seems very strange and alien to me, but again, it does pay very well. Is this a deal breaker or too weird or would you consider it?


You are very picky for having a blue collar job. Suck it up and enjoy the fact you have a job in the first place. There are a lot of nannies here that are struggling and have less.
Anonymous
Post 01/06/2019 09:39     Subject: "formal" home: how you would feel about it?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:A uniform is a deal-breaker for this many people? I miss my old school uniforms so badly. 5 minutes out the door, and no worries about repeating clothes, buying new clothes, work appropriateness...

But, then, I do think of myself as an employee, and not a member of the family or an independent service provider with clients. I'm in it for the money and benefits.


Even if you were looked at as just to help at least you know where you stand and you know there are very clear boundaries. I could really get behind a job like that versus something more intertwined .


That was my initial thought. There is a clear employer/employee boundary.

Op what does the contract look like?