Anonymous wrote:I am the grandmother. When I go to visit my grandchild when my son and DIL aren’t there, the nanny is very much in charge. My son and DIL support this.

Example: I want to go to the park with my grandchild. Nanny said that my grandchild has been at school all morning and she wants to keep her home to play.

I have to ask to do everything.

Is this the norm?

Talk to the parents and understand the child's routine better. Maybe after morning school is lunch and nap time/downtime. Maybe playground time is in the AM while at school and again at 4pm when s/he awakes from nap.

Do not take a young child to the playground during nap time - of course the child will power through and play play play. But the problem is then that same child is later very overtired, clumsy, iratable, and prone to accidents/getting hurt. Just ask what time to come by for a walk to the park or playground this week. Or else save it for the weekend.

yes, the nanny is in charge.

Nanny is in charge. My MIL comes over once a week when our nanny and DD are there and could have posted this same thing! MIL is always late and sometimes doesn’t even show up - and wants to do what she wants to do with DD. Yes, nanny says no to my MIL often and we support that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Jeezus you people are nuts. Grandma wants to take the child to the park, for crying out loud. She's not looking to take her on a 4 hour car ride.

I get that the nanny is in charge, but the nanny has no common sense.

Nanny knows what the child needs in the moment. That is more than common sense.

Lol, again. Grandma is asking to take her to the park. For a kid, that's actually healthier than staying indoors. Is it remotely possible that nanny doesn't always know best? Maybe nanny hates going to the park b/c it's hot out or whatever.

You have no clue what the situation is!!!

My DD goes to a Reggio preschool here in Southern California where they are outside all morning. After nap, she just wants to play on her room.

And like another poster said - stop focusing on the example!! Is the nanny in charge or not?

Neither do you. My goodness - it swings both ways.

Preschools in the DC area are not "outside all morning" - sporadically, yes, but "always"? nope.

Sure nanny is in charge, but again, it's grandma coming over for a visit - she should respect the schedule of the child but a short walk.visit to the park is hardly turning the child's day upside down. Is your child's schedule so sacred or planned to the minute that this kind of thing is not possible? If not, I weep for your child.

A 15 minute walk (each way) to the park and 30-90 minutes at the park?! For crying out! That’s 1-2 hours and yes! It’s very disruptive to the child’s routine if it’s not preplanned!