Anonymous
05/11/2018 18:31
Subject: Re:Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
You have to move on now, OP. Watch that your older child doesn't feel abandonned by his nanny of four years. Don't badmouth her in front of your child.
And good luck. I hope your housecleaner works out as a good nanny for you.
And good luck. I hope your housecleaner works out as a good nanny for you.
Anonymous
05/11/2018 17:50
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My guess is that she has some nanny friends egging her on, and telling her not to back down.
I feel badly for both of you.
My guess is that this nanny was foreign-born and her husband was egging her on. I can't imagine other nannies giving her this bad advice.
What does being forgein born have anything to do with this?
You would have to know the Central American culture to understand. I would also say she was Central American.
Op here, although I was born and raised in Los Angeles, my parents immigrated here from Nicaragua. So please explain to me what my nanny’s culture has anything to do with this? I’m confused. My nanny is actually “American,” however her grandfather was born in Mexico. I’ve never heard of another nanny doing this —regardless of where they are from
Yea you’re right, it’s been done though. Just by no one I know.
Wait, OP - I disagree with the reason your nanny asked for a big raise but don't go overboard with the "never been done before" thing! Many, many salespeople gauge your income before they give you a price. Your nanny took a shot (as misguided as it was) and failed. You can let it go now. You have another nanny (sort of) and you won.
Anonymous
05/11/2018 17:46
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My guess is that she has some nanny friends egging her on, and telling her not to back down.
I feel badly for both of you.
My guess is that this nanny was foreign-born and her husband was egging her on. I can't imagine other nannies giving her this bad advice.
What does being forgein born have anything to do with this?
You would have to know the Central American culture to understand. I would also say she was Central American.
Op here, although I was born and raised in Los Angeles, my parents immigrated here from Nicaragua. So please explain to me what my nanny’s culture has anything to do with this? I’m confused. My nanny is actually “American,” however her grandfather was born in Mexico. I’ve never heard of another nanny doing this —regardless of where they are from
Wait, OP - I disagree with the reason your nanny asked for a big raise but don't go overboard with the "never been done before" thing! Many, many salespeople gauge your income before they give you a price. Your nanny took a shot (as misguided as it was) and failed. You can let it go now. You have another nanny (sort of) and you won.
Anonymous
05/11/2018 17:35
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My guess is that she has some nanny friends egging her on, and telling her not to back down.
I feel badly for both of you.
My guess is that this nanny was foreign-born and her husband was egging her on. I can't imagine other nannies giving her this bad advice.
What does being forgein born have anything to do with this?
You would have to know the Central American culture to understand. I would also say she was Central American.
Op here, although I was born and raised in Los Angeles, my parents immigrated here from Nicaragua. So please explain to me what my nanny’s culture has anything to do with this? I’m confused. My nanny is actually “American,” however her grandfather was born in Mexico. I’ve never heard of another nanny doing this —regardless of where they are from
Anonymous
05/11/2018 17:20
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My guess is that she has some nanny friends egging her on, and telling her not to back down.
I feel badly for both of you.
My guess is that this nanny was foreign-born and her husband was egging her on. I can't imagine other nannies giving her this bad advice.
What does being forgein born have anything to do with this?
You would have to know the Central American culture to understand. I would also say she was Central American.
Anonymous
05/11/2018 15:48
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My guess is that she has some nanny friends egging her on, and telling her not to back down.
I feel badly for both of you.
My guess is that this nanny was foreign-born and her husband was egging her on. I can't imagine other nannies giving her this bad advice.
What does being forgein born have anything to do with this?
Anonymous
05/11/2018 15:13
Subject: Re:Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
The fact that so many nannies posted in support of you, OP, and the outrageousness of your nanny's demands, should tell you a great deal.
Anonymous
05/11/2018 14:58
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:My guess is that she has some nanny friends egging her on, and telling her not to back down.
I feel badly for both of you.
My guess is that this nanny was foreign-born and her husband was egging her on. I can't imagine other nannies giving her this bad advice.
Anonymous
05/11/2018 13:37
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Hello, everyone op here. Thank you all for your comments. I asked her again if she was willing to take $27.50/h and she said no. I then proceeded to tell her that we would not be renewing our contract and that today was her last day. I told her not to come back. I’m handing her her severance pay and reference letter. As much as I am sad to let her go, I know I can find someone who respects my family and I.
She was upset and said she would think about accepting $27.50, but I told her no that’s she’s already let go and we do not want her to continue working for us.
You are right, OP, and, as a nanny, you did the right thing. However, please remember that your older child is probably very attached to this nanny and give her time to adjust. Could this old nanny still see her a few times to ease the transition?
Of course I wouldn’t mind her coming and seeing him! But professionallly, our relationship is done with her. I offered the full time nanny position to our part time housekeeper and she accepted because she had been looking for full time work. She’s been with us since before we had kids so she knows my son very well. Hopefully him being familiar and friendly with her will also help ease the transition.
Anonymous
05/11/2018 13:20
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:Hello, everyone op here. Thank you all for your comments. I asked her again if she was willing to take $27.50/h and she said no. I then proceeded to tell her that we would not be renewing our contract and that today was her last day. I told her not to come back. I’m handing her her severance pay and reference letter. As much as I am sad to let her go, I know I can find someone who respects my family and I.
She was upset and said she would think about accepting $27.50, but I told her no that’s she’s already let go and we do not want her to continue working for us.
You are right, OP, and, as a nanny, you did the right thing. However, please remember that your older child is probably very attached to this nanny and give her time to adjust. Could this old nanny still see her a few times to ease the transition?
Anonymous
05/11/2018 13:07
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:Hello, everyone op here. Thank you all for your comments. I asked her again if she was willing to take $27.50/h and she said no. I then proceeded to tell her that we would not be renewing our contract and that today was her last day. I told her not to come back. I’m handing her her severance pay and reference letter. As much as I am sad to let her go, I know I can find someone who respects my family and I.
She was upset and said she would think about accepting $27.50, but I told her no that’s she’s already let go and we do not want her to continue working for us.
That's a shame. Personally, the deal breaker for me would have been the invasion of privacy and essentially blackmail about getting the raise. You called her bluff. You will find a great someone.
-A nanny
Anonymous
05/11/2018 12:51
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
My guess is that she has some nanny friends egging her on, and telling her not to back down.
I feel badly for both of you.
I feel badly for both of you.
Anonymous
05/11/2018 12:45
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Well, she sure changed her tune quick! 
Anonymous
05/11/2018 11:42
Subject: Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Hello, everyone op here. Thank you all for your comments. I asked her again if she was willing to take $27.50/h and she said no. I then proceeded to tell her that we would not be renewing our contract and that today was her last day. I told her not to come back. I’m handing her her severance pay and reference letter. As much as I am sad to let her go, I know I can find someone who respects my family and I.
She was upset and said she would think about accepting $27.50, but I told her no that’s she’s already let go and we do not want her to continue working for us.
She was upset and said she would think about accepting $27.50, but I told her no that’s she’s already let go and we do not want her to continue working for us.
Anonymous
05/11/2018 11:09
Subject: Re:Nanny asking for ridiculous raise
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am a nanny and it makes no difference what you make or what expenses you have. Makes no difference if you can afford more or not. Stick to your guns and tell her to grow up.
I will say, our nanny gave us a break on the raise she was asking for when she realized that we made a lot less than she thought and actually couldn’t swing it. (My husband is a trainee doctor — a fellow — and she definitely thought he was making 3-4x what he is.) So, for us, what we made mattered a little. We gave her a second week of paid time off at her election (3 total guaranteed, but really more like 4-6 depending on the year) and promised a $2 raise when he finished his fellowship next year.
Btdt. I’m happy to sit down with a family and hammer out what the position is really worth, what they can afford now, and write up a contract to reflect a significant increase when they will be able to afford it. I’m a live in, I can afford to do that, but most live out nannies have a bottom line.
Why is your income based off their income? So, if they make a larger salary, you feel you deserve it? No, that's not how i works.