We are on the lower end of the scale - closer to $20K in DC. Our AP doesn't drive and we do smaller local trips that she's welcome to join since our kids are young. We do use our points to buy AP 2-3 airline tickets per year, and provide cash bonus at holiday and birthday, along with some gift cards along the way for shopping.

I don't account for extra food since she eats what the family eats and I usually do keep cooling on since I would be working from home or the toddler would be home. We use a smaller agency (API), so fees are closer to $7K.

I budget $500/week, so $26k per year. I'd say we're right at that. There are some costs that are impossible to capture exactly (extra utility use, extra food)