Next time she complains, join in. "Yea, I know how you feel mb, taking care of toddlers can be challenging and draining. You know when nk cries none stop for that toy while I'm cooking his food or doing his laundry and I have to constantly remind him to have patience I'll be there in 2 seconds, or when I have to rock baby to sleep for 40 minutes and run to switch the laundry, answer the delivery man, mop the floor, pull the roast out of the oven before he wakes up again. Man, I get tired. You know what helps? "Insert advice". Oh, this reminds me I have to go grocery shopping after work and scrub my tub." Then get distracted my something you have to do for the baby and walk away.

I've done this with all my Mbs who complain. Also, every time they complain I give advice on how to make it easier. They eventually get annoyed and never complain to me again or they start to respect my opinion and ask for help.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
People complain. That's what they do. Most of the posters on this thread are complaining.

Just ignore it, OP. Or agree with her about how hard it is caring for her children during the week. Starting a whiny thread about how unappreciated you think you are is not a productive way to solve your problem. It just brings out the nanny trolls who have contempt for their MBs. No wonder they aren't thanked.


So all people complain but nannies can't? Most employees are generally not in a position to tell their employers to stop doing something annoying (as opposed to the other way around) so it makes perfect sense that they would complain to like minded people.

I am an MB who posted in support of OP as I have a boss who does this to me constantly.

Something tells me you aren't an MB.

I never said nannies can't complain. Most of the nannies on this board do nothing but complain.

I am absolutely an MB and I have a terrific nanny. It is my experience (which is limited - granted) on this board that it is the MBs who are constantly whining about something - not the nannies.

Anonymous wrote:
People complain. That's what they do. Most of the posters on this thread are complaining.

Just ignore it, OP. Or agree with her about how hard it is caring for her children during the week. Starting a whiny thread about how unappreciated you think you are is not a productive way to solve your problem. It just brings out the nanny trolls who have contempt for their MBs. No wonder they aren't thanked.


So all people complain but nannies can't? Most employees are generally not in a position to tell their employers to stop doing something annoying (as opposed to the other way around) so it makes perfect sense that they would complain to like minded people.

I am an MB who posted in support of OP as I have a boss who does this to me constantly.

Something tells me you aren't an MB.

I never said nannies can't complain. Most of the nannies on this board do nothing but complain.

Anonymous wrote:In all honesty, for people who are good with kids naturally, it is MUCH easier. I have little moments of panic at being alone with my kids, because it's not natural for me. I'm not a maternal person and don't think all kids are adorable. It IS mentally exhausting to me.

Exactly. Weekends are so mentally draining on me that no one would even understand.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a mom and can tell you that when I have a day to focus solely on my kids it feels entirely different than when I have to focus on my kids, plus errands, plus other household management, plus being a decent spouse, plus thinking about which bills to pay...you get the idea. I think you're underestimating the value of being able to focus on one job at a time. When I'm home with my kids on the weekend my attention is divided by many more jobs other than just my kids. I don't sit down during the weekends. My nanny sits down for a couple of hours each day.

Not OP but another nanny and I don't sit down all day either.

Don't you have a husband to help you on weekends? I am alone with my charges all day long and do have their laundry and cooking to attend to as well as their errands. I nanny for a newborn and a 3.5 year old - I don't generally get a lot of time to focus on one thing at a time either. So I am doing basically what you are doing but without the help of my husband or any second adult.

Plus they are YOUR KIDS.

OP wasn't even complaining about her work - just her MBs whining as if she, the MB, has is so hard.

I have a husband. On weekends, we are home with four kids. Nanny has only two kids all day. On weekends, we still do laundry; we sort clothes. Shop for shoes. Plan meals for the week and grocery shop. Go to the hardware store. Run around to sports, activities, etc. Plan birthday parties. Fix the toilet that keeps running. Replace light bulbs. Check and respond to work emails. Our kids are only one of many responsibilities. There is a HUGE difference if I decide to focus only on kids or kid tasks and leave aside the other vast pile of work - mental and physical - that is a part of my usual weekend. Weekdays with just my two younger kids at home feels like vacation.

Yes, I am sure your nanny has it so easy (her life is a vacation) and your life is so, so hard! Poor you, PP. How awful things must be for you!! Maybe you could get your husband to do something so it doesn't all fall on you! You do everything!

You poor, poor thing - forced to have four children! And how lucky for your nanny to never have to ever see your two older kids even when they are sick or on vacation or when they come home from school.

Your life truly is hell, PP. You are absolutely right in never acknowledging what your nanny does for your younger kids - her life is a vacation caring for your children five days a week (Your weekend is just two days, right PP? -- never mind it doesn't matter -- your two days are much harder than her five days with your children).

You seem to believe that I never thank the nanny and assume her work is easy. Neither is true. OP's post indicates shock that her MB would say it's hard caring for the toddler over the weekend. I can offer you my perspective - from experience - that focusing solely on my children's needs is easier for me than focusing on my children plus everything else that is involved in managing a home and a life. I do not assume the nanny feels like she's on vacation, but I can say that I certainly feel like a day with just my two kids and no "household management" feels far more manageable than a day full of the "everything else" that is real life. I'm not complaining that everything is so hard for me, waaa waaa waaa; but I can say that one (all kids, household tasks, the usual) is easier than the other (two kids, kid-centric work only).

I had four children by choice. My husband is helpful. Days that focus solely on kid stuff are STILL easier. I understand that doesn't fit with your narrative of "parents are lazy, nannies work so hard and are never acknowledged". We thank our nanny every day when she leaves. But yes, her five days a week with my two kids - including her 1.5-2 hours of time when she flops on the couch and reads her phone - look a whole lot quieter and less hectic than my average weekend day. Sick days? I stay home. School vacation? During the school year, I coordinate my vacation time to match their schedule, and during summer, the older kids are in camps all day. After school? I go in to the office before my kids are awake so that I can be home with them after school.

Again, sorry that my experience doesn't match your narrative, but that doesn't make it false or invalid. Parents can feel just as exhausted as nannies - even if there is another parent on hand - because the weekend work load likely looks a lot different. Remember, nannies are there to care for the child, and that's it. Parents typically aren't so limited in what they do during a day.

Anonymous wrote:People complain. That's what they do. Most of the posters on this thread are complaining.

Just ignore it, OP. Or agree with her about how hard it is caring for her children during the week. Starting a whiny thread about how unappreciated you think you are is not a productive way to solve your problem. It just brings out the nanny trolls who have contempt for their MBs. No wonder they aren't thanked.

So all people complain but nannies can't? Most employees are generally not in a position to tell their employers to stop doing something annoying (as opposed to the other way around) so it makes perfect sense that they would complain to like minded people.

I am an MB who posted in support of OP as I have a boss who does this to me constantly.