Anonymous
12/11/2014 17:17
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
I think you like the idea of having a nanny it makes you feel posh.
But it doesn't seem like you can afford one bonus aside.
I'm sure you could find a home day care for less than $700 a week and your child will get the same amount of attention as in your current share.
But it doesn't seem like you can afford one bonus aside.
I'm sure you could find a home day care for less than $700 a week and your child will get the same amount of attention as in your current share.
Anonymous
12/11/2014 17:13
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
I don't understand why you fear her quitting?
If you truly treat her well she's not likely to quit over a bonus.
However it could be awkward for you if you don't give a bonus and the other share family does.
A holiday bonus is standard for household employees you and ops may not like that but it's true.
If you can't do a full week why not a quarter of that?
If you truly treat her well she's not likely to quit over a bonus.
However it could be awkward for you if you don't give a bonus and the other share family does.
A holiday bonus is standard for household employees you and ops may not like that but it's true.
If you can't do a full week why not a quarter of that?
Anonymous
12/11/2014 15:35
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
Oops, sorry nannydeb. I messed the quotes up there, while trying to agree with you!
Anonymous
12/11/2014 15:35
Subject: Re:A bonus vent-ish
Good Lord. OP, a bonus is just that, an additional amount of money for doing an exceptional job. As a nanny, nannies who expect bonuses and/or try to play the "I'll leave if my bonus isn't X..." game with their employers PISS ME OFF.
Give your nanny what you can. Many nannies don't get bonuses at all.
And, in all honesty, if you are stretching so much to afford your nanny you might want to seriously look into a FT nanny share.
This. The only place I've ever heard this "standard bonus" nonsense is on this forum. We have never given a week's bonus and our nanny has been with us for almost five years.
Most professions cut bonuses years ago.
nannydebsays
12/11/2014 14:56
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
So if hosting the share doesn't work (and I am kind of feeling sorry for a nanny in a share in a 1 bedroom apartment), why not seek out a share partner who can host? That way, if that host family needs longer hours, it's not an issue.
Anonymous
12/11/2014 13:41
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
Your excessive angst (PP was spot-on with that assessment) is what makes you sound like a troll. Why are you posting about this? Has your nanny given you any indication she will quit if she doesn't like her bonus or are you basing all of your worries on the anonymous DCUM nanny forum? Because that's pretty idiotic, and I expect why people think you're making this up. What possible reason do you have for being this upset over something that hasn't happened - and probably won't?
Anonymous
12/11/2014 10:11
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
Give what you can/want and don't worry.
A nanny who is happy with her family will appreciate that you were thoughtful with her.
Some families don't give anything to the nanny.
A nanny who is happy with her family will appreciate that you were thoughtful with her.
Some families don't give anything to the nanny.
Anonymous
12/11/2014 10:04
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:nannydebsays wrote:Good Lord. OP, a bonus is just that, an additional amount of money for doing an exceptional job. As a nanny, nannies who expect bonuses and/or try to play the "I'll leave if my bonus isn't X..." game with their employers PISS ME OFF.
Give your nanny what you can. Many nannies don't get bonuses at all.
And, in all honesty, if you are stretching so much to afford your nanny you might want to seriously look into a FT nanny share.
Thanks - we tried for a FT share and it was very difficult because our nanny has pretty set/strict hours. It's rare in DC (actual DC not the burbs) that a family needs 8 hours a day of care. We had trouble, and our nanny was fine with a pt share. It works great for all of us. We're stretched to the point of $500-$700 is a lot. We have savings for emergencies. I honestly don't think a bonus is an emergency. However, maybe since we haven't had her for a full year, we can give her a bonus at "annual review" time to make up for not being able to pay her what seems to be expected by nannies in this area at holiday time. That will give us time to save money for that bonus.
More nonsense.
If you're not a troll you're exceedingly clueless. What a mess.
we tried for 5 months with our nanny to find a full time share (which would benefit her more than it would me in terms of finances) but finding a family that needs care from 8:30-4:30, and won't be late routinely (we tried, they were always struggling to get pick their child up at 4:30) is difficult due to the nature of many DC jobs. Our jobs are 9 hour days but my husband and I make it work - he goes in at 6:15AM in order to make it work with the commute and his duty hours. We tried and it wasn't working.
Gotta love the nanny forum, where it seems anyone who doesn't believe exactly what you believe or do exactly what you would do is a troll. Sheesh.
Anonymous
12/11/2014 10:00
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
Anonymous wrote:
Your financial problems are not your nanny's problem. She puts up with cheap parents and does a fantastic job taking care of your kids. You cannot give her a measley week's salary, you cannot afford a nanny. Cheapskates like you are nothing but pigs. I hope she finds anothet job with someone who appreciates her and can afford to give her a decent bonus. Hell. I'd Go without something for myself to give my employees a bonus.
I am not a nanny.
....how am I cheap? My nanny gets everything and more than she negotiated for in the contract. If that makes me a pig, I guess she's living high off the hog.
Anonymous
12/11/2014 09:54
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
The long term financial implications aren't worth staying home. And honestly, my child gets much more attention from our nanny, who is responsible for ZERO duties beyond childcare and cleaning up after him (no laundry, no cleaning, no cooking, ect). When I'm home with him, I have all that to do and more, so it's better this way.
We've calculated it, and it's just not worth leaving the work force for a few years. I see it here all the time, "how do I get back in the labor market?! How do I fill the SAH gap on my resume?". Long term financial stability is just as important as being home, which I was fortunate enough to be able to do for the first 7 months of his life.
We've calculated it, and it's just not worth leaving the work force for a few years. I see it here all the time, "how do I get back in the labor market?! How do I fill the SAH gap on my resume?". Long term financial stability is just as important as being home, which I was fortunate enough to be able to do for the first 7 months of his life.
Anonymous
12/11/2014 07:35
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
Anonymous wrote:employer here...I HATE seeing the whole "one weeks pay for a bonus" because we cannot afford to do that. I really want to shower my nanny with gifts and bonuses as much as possible because she's so wonderful, but we have a nanny because we've never gotten in to a day care spot and it turns out that we just love her and how much my child is thriving with her.
We're giving her what we can afford - neither my husband nor myself receive a bonus at all during the year (both fed employees) and have faced pay cuts and recovering from losing pay while I was out on "maternity leave".
While a weeks pay might be standard (I've never received anything like that at any job!), I really hate that I can't provide this for her. It bums me out
St. at home with yours kids.
Anonymous
12/10/2014 23:22
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
Anonymous wrote:And isn't the today show filed in NYC? of course their bonus is huge is NYC. Everything is mos expensive there!
Give your nanny what you can afford. And also write her a really thoughtful thank you card from your heart. I'm a center director and I love the cards from parents thanking me for specific things, whether it's how I run the center, how much I made a difference in their lives or in their child's, or sharing something the child has said about me. And I read those when things are tough so i can remember the good things. So make sure you do that in addition to whatever monetary amount you give her.
compared to the reasonable prices of DC?
Anonymous
12/10/2014 23:08
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
And isn't the today show filed in NYC? of course their bonus is huge is NYC. Everything is mos expensive there!
Give your nanny what you can afford. And also write her a really thoughtful thank you card from your heart. I'm a center director and I love the cards from parents thanking me for specific things, whether it's how I run the center, how much I made a difference in their lives or in their child's, or sharing something the child has said about me. And I read those when things are tough so i can remember the good things. So make sure you do that in addition to whatever monetary amount you give her.
Give your nanny what you can afford. And also write her a really thoughtful thank you card from your heart. I'm a center director and I love the cards from parents thanking me for specific things, whether it's how I run the center, how much I made a difference in their lives or in their child's, or sharing something the child has said about me. And I read those when things are tough so i can remember the good things. So make sure you do that in addition to whatever monetary amount you give her.
Anonymous
12/10/2014 22:28
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
A bonus is standard in the nanny profession.
I was watching on NBC's Today show on Monday morning..A segment regarding how much to give as a bonus and they said to give a week's worth of pay to your full-time nanny for the holidays.
I was watching on NBC's Today show on Monday morning..A segment regarding how much to give as a bonus and they said to give a week's worth of pay to your full-time nanny for the holidays.
Anonymous
12/10/2014 21:54
Subject: A bonus vent-ish
I find your angst excessive. If you really can't afford it, don't give it. I'm sure your nanny sees that your arent living it up in your one bedroom with no cable. It sounds like you show your appreciation year round. The people who are well paid and would quit over a bonus are those who are unhappy with the job and the bonus is the last straw. Give her a nice gift, have the kids make something for her, cook her a special dinner, give her a gift card to a nice store, bake her a cake with the kids or some combination of the above. Those would all be touching.