Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I sometimes give a gift to the family, and always give something to the children. To the poster who says that employees do not give gifts to employers, that may be your way of doing things, but it isn't mine. I gave my first client some pj's she liked, and her husband, a Salvador Dali coffee table book (he was an avid art collector), and they loved their gifts. I gave another client a bottle of perfume ( I showered and changed at work, on my way to a play, and she wouldn't let me leave until I told her what I was wearing..lolol)

To the nanny, who gave her client some butt pads, don't let anyone on here, tell you what's appropriate for your relationship with your client. If she's expressed to you, that she's getting cosmetic surgery, then you obviously have "that" kind of relationship. A clients mother (Nana) showed me where a lump was removed from her breast. I didn't ask to see it, but I understood her need to talk about/ share her experience.

Also, to the poster that said that a nanny buying a gift for her clients is akin to a gift being purchased for you, with your money,( that you may not like/want) that's a callous and I hate to say elitist way of thinking. OMG, a nanny could never know what a client likes....Really??Also, I've always had other side jobs. Stop counting your nanny's money. A gift is a form of saying thank you.

Folks need to loosen up. Seriously. The best Nanny client situation, is when you truly feel like family. On both ends of the equation. I guess I've been lucky.

Poster you addressed here. I'm a nanny. And yes, I feel weird buying gifts for people who have given me the money I used to buy them. Not too sure how this is elitest...but it sounds like you may have a chip on your shoulder regarding the financial imbalance between you and your employer.
I MAKE gifts with my charges for their parents, much less complicated and, yes, much more likely to result in a gift that the parents actually want.

Actually, it appears that YOU are the one with a chip on your shoulder, if you are in essence telling someone how to spend their money, and if you read so much into gift-giving. I come from a culture/background of nannies. I grew up with nannies. My mum and sister often tell me tales of stuff my childhood nannies got for me. I am an artist, so there's no shortage of items my charges create for their parents, with my assistance. We are constantly baking/creating art, so that's never an issue. However, I see nothing wrong with getting a gift, if I feel like it, and when i'm sure of my clients tastes. I was not raised to view gift-giving, as a gift exchange. If I give your child something, do not assume I want something from you. I've been lucky that my past clients have been okay with that, and didn't come on dcurbanmom, to talk about how weird I was. One of my former clients has had me buy perfumes for her, because she likes what I gave her....sheesh folks. It truly isn't that serious. Live and let live, I'm sure the nanny who got her client butt-pads for Xmas, has a very casual relationship with her. Her error was in putting it on here, for the world to see.