Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The boy looked about 6 or 7, and the two girls younger, like 4 or 5.

Am asking about the ages because it seems odd for children to be at the park at naptime, or at least rest time. Are Montgomery County schools out for vacation already?

If I ever see anything concerning, I *always* think of some friendly small talk to get a better sense of what's going on. That's why I don't really believe a caring person would just say absolutely nothing.

I have no dog in this race, but will just say I have 3 girls who are 3, 5, and 7. The 3 yr old does not nap and I homeschool. Thus, we are able to do things like go to a playground in the middle of the day.

Wow. I didn't know a three year old could manage without a nap all day. My three year old twins take a three hour nap every day.

Yep. If circumstances are just so, she may fall asleep for an hour, but otherwise she'll keep going and going, until she crashes around 8:30 at night.

I can't imagine how either of you make it through that long of a day, every day. I'd at least make her have "quite time" for an hour.

One of my twins stopped napping around 2.5, except for occasionally falling asleep in random places without warning (once on the kitchen floor with her hand in the cat's water dish while I was in the bathroom. Go figure). The other kept napping until he was a few months past their third birthday. I can't imagine a three hour nap a day for them! I would keep my fingers crossed for an hour or two. We kept up "quiet time" until they were around 3.5, but then they started full day pre-school and it was rare that either would lie down afterwards. Before anyone attacks me for sending my three year olds to full day pre-school, they have autism, so it was half a day of "regular" pre-school and half a day of "special" school (which is when they had speech, OT, PT, etc). They were asleep by 8pm every night, though, until this year (they're in first grade now).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The boy looked about 6 or 7, and the two girls younger, like 4 or 5.

Am asking about the ages because it seems odd for children to be at the park at naptime, or at least rest time. Are Montgomery County schools out for vacation already?

If I ever see anything concerning, I *always* think of some friendly small talk to get a better sense of what's going on. That's why I don't really believe a caring person would just say absolutely nothing.

OP here again. Now, it's tricky. The kids were not in physical danger. Their safety and physical well-being wasn't an issue. But, IMO, the nannies were not doing their jobs. I am still not sure what I could have possibly said to them that would make a difference in their behavior. It's really their employers (the moms) who could potentially make a difference by speaking to them.

I've felt the same way in the past. If there's obvious abuse/neglect, authorities can be called and reports can be filed, but if its just a case of poor nannying, it's hard to know what (if anything) to do and approaching the nannies will likely do nothing. I would keep an eye out when you're there in the future - maybe you'll be lucky enough to run into one of the parents at some point.

We live in Montgomery County and my daughter who is in a private school finished last week and my son who is in a public school finished yesterday. Also, for what it is worth, my 3 year old hasn't napped for a year. Some kids just don't nap....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^OP here. That would be terrible if they weren't getting paid what they deserve. I really hope that the nannies aren't using the kids to take out their frustrations about pay. (But are there really nannies out there whose level of kindness and affection rises and falls with the pay level? Isn't it more likely that some nannies just aren't great, no matter what the pay, and others are wonderful?)

I don't think its that a nanny's kindness affection or ability rises or falls with her pay. It's more that you attract a certain type of nanny with a certain wage. If you offer an above average wage you attract all nannies; the good, the excellent, and the crappy ones. It's up to you to weed out the ones that don't meet your standards. If you offer below average or even crappy wages you attract only the crap nannies since the others can do better. You don't have to do any weeding out because they are all likely of the same subpar quality. "You get what you pay for"

Very well said.

Anonymous wrote:^^OP here. That would be terrible if they weren't getting paid what they deserve. I really hope that the nannies aren't using the kids to take out their frustrations about pay. (But are there really nannies out there whose level of kindness and affection rises and falls with the pay level? Isn't it more likely that some nannies just aren't great, no matter what the pay, and others are wonderful?)

I don't think its that a nanny's kindness affection or ability rises or falls with her pay. It's more that you attract a certain type of nanny with a certain wage. If you offer an above average wage you attract all nannies; the good, the excellent, and the crappy ones. It's up to you to weed out the ones that don't meet your standards. If you offer below average or even crappy wages you attract only the crap nannies since the others can do better. You don't have to do any weeding out because they are all likely of the same subpar quality. "You get what you pay for"

Anonymous wrote:OP thanks for posting.

To pposters. I have a "broken english nanny" who talks in spanish to my child (who is now bilingual). I pay 18 an hour for one child for 40 hours a week. So enough with the assumptions about immigrants and language and low pay. I would say the same for assumptions about you get what you pay for. You are only trying to make yourself feel better when we all know that it is possible that our well-paid nanny is ignoring our children.

I said anything is possible, as in "every bunch of people has its bad apples".

ISYN.com is no longer in service.

OP, perhaps you can post this in a local community paper or on CL.

OP thanks for posting.

To pposters. I have a "broken english nanny" who talks in spanish to my child (who is now bilingual). I pay 18 an hour for one child for 40 hours a week. So enough with the assumptions about immigrants and language and low pay. I would say the same for assumptions about you get what you pay for. You are only trying to make yourself feel better when we all know that it is possible that our well-paid nanny is ignoring our children.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The boy looked about 6 or 7, and the two girls younger, like 4 or 5.

Am asking about the ages because it seems odd for children to be at the park at naptime, or at least rest time. Are Montgomery County schools out for vacation already?

If I ever see anything concerning, I *always* think of some friendly small talk to get a better sense of what's going on. That's why I don't really believe a caring person would just say absolutely nothing.

I have no dog in this race, but will just say I have 3 girls who are 3, 5, and 7. The 3 yr old does not nap and I homeschool. Thus, we are able to do things like go to a playground in the middle of the day.

Wow. I didn't know a three year old could manage without a nap all day. My three year old twins take a three hour nap every day.

Yep. If circumstances are just so, she may fall asleep for an hour, but otherwise she'll keep going and going, until she crashes around 8:30 at night.

I can't imagine how either of you make it through that long of a day, every day. I'd at least make her have "quite time" for an hour.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The boy looked about 6 or 7, and the two girls younger, like 4 or 5.

Am asking about the ages because it seems odd for children to be at the park at naptime, or at least rest time. Are Montgomery County schools out for vacation already?

If I ever see anything concerning, I *always* think of some friendly small talk to get a better sense of what's going on. That's why I don't really believe a caring person would just say absolutely nothing.

I have no dog in this race, but will just say I have 3 girls who are 3, 5, and 7. The 3 yr old does not nap and I homeschool. Thus, we are able to do things like go to a playground in the middle of the day.

Wow. I didn't know a three year old could manage without a nap all day. My three year old twins take a three hour nap every day.

Yep. If circumstances are just so, she may fall asleep for an hour, but otherwise she'll keep going and going, until she crashes around 8:30 at night.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The boy looked about 6 or 7, and the two girls younger, like 4 or 5.

Am asking about the ages because it seems odd for children to be at the park at naptime, or at least rest time. Are Montgomery County schools out for vacation already?

If I ever see anything concerning, I *always* think of some friendly small talk to get a better sense of what's going on. That's why I don't really believe a caring person would just say absolutely nothing.

I have no dog in this race, but will just say I have 3 girls who are 3, 5, and 7. The 3 yr old does not nap and I homeschool. Thus, we are able to do things like go to a playground in the middle of the day.

Wow. I didn't know a three year old could manage without a nap all day. My three year old twins take a three hour nap every day.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The boy looked about 6 or 7, and the two girls younger, like 4 or 5.

Am asking about the ages because it seems odd for children to be at the park at naptime, or at least rest time. Are Montgomery County schools out for vacation already?

If I ever see anything concerning, I *always* think of some friendly small talk to get a better sense of what's going on. That's why I don't really believe a caring person would just say absolutely nothing.

I have no dog in this race, but will just say I have 3 girls who are 3, 5, and 7. The 3 yr old does not nap and I homeschool. Thus, we are able to do things like go to a playground in the middle of the day.

Anonymous wrote:PP-yeah, I agree on some level but I also know that I, personally, never associated my pay with my interactions with the kids. (when I was a nanny) Never. (at least not consciously!) Now, as another PP said, if i was paid a lower wage and was asked to do housekeeping/parents laundry/other tasks demanding flexibility I WOULD probably think to myself 'why am I doing this for XX amt?' But i'd never sit there and not play with the kids or be mean to them or ignore their stories, as OP said the nannies in question did.

PP here and just to be clear, I completely agree that the question is 100% irrelevant in regards to what OP saw (I posted in support of OP and said I think those nannies are going to be bad nannies no matter what).

"Nobody said it was right. It's simply reality all over the world. You get what you pay for, unless you choose to be some sort of volunteer worker. "

That is not an arguement for paying any given nanny more though. If she's a crappy nanny at $10/hr she'll still be a crappy one at $15/hr. It's at best an arguement that if a nanny can only find a job paying below market rates then a family should be suspicious of how good she is.

PP-yeah, I agree on some level but I also know that I, personally, never associated my pay with my interactions with the kids. (when I was a nanny) Never. (at least not consciously!) Now, as another PP said, if i was paid a lower wage and was asked to do housekeeping/parents laundry/other tasks demanding flexibility I WOULD probably think to myself 'why am I doing this for XX amt?' But i'd never sit there and not play with the kids or be mean to them or ignore their stories, as OP said the nannies in question did.