Holy cow, MB - back off or you will lose her. She answered your questions to the point of showing you the reciept and pictures! Just to enlighten anyone confused about this...I have been a nanny for over 20 years. Here is how it works. A nanny job is not like most other jobs, in that she does not have a "real" lunch break. By that I mean, she cannot leave and run errands, like soooo many people do on their lunch breaks. Most people who work have this ability - it is the law in most states (if not all) that you must have a lunch break. Since she is chained to the job all day, it is customary that you give a little leeway for the occasional errand with your child(ren). Obviously, she cannot abuse it, but really, she needs to feel she can do a short errand here or there. How is she supposed to go to the bank (if needing to go in person)? The insurance agent, the vet to pick up medicine, the whatever - there are so many things that are only open when nannies are working. Plus, even a store where she just had to pick the stuff up....she was right there....really? If I shop for groceries for my bosses, and I need a handful of grocery items, am I not supposed to get them, and go back at the end of my already too-long day??

I agree with the other pps who advise OP to let it go. I have employed nannies and housekeepers for over 20 years in my home. Your nanny does not sound like she is taking advantage of you and even showed you the receipt to prove that she was telling the truth. I'm sure she went home that day feeling bad about herself and the job. That is not what you want with a good employee, trust me. Let the little stuff go.

I have never taken a charge to the mall, nor do I ever intend to, but I would not work for someone who had a list of "banned" places I was not allowed to go to. Last I checked I was an adult, and I would hope my employer thinks enough of my judgement to allow me to decide what is an appropriate use of our time.

Anonymous wrote:The mall is the worst place on the planet for a kid. Guarantee that your nanny will be shopping while your kid is being drug along. Those play yards are disgusting!

Really? The worst place?

-Prison
-Jungle
-Public restroom
-Possibly restroom at home
-Any house on Hoarders
-Elephant graveyard
-Third world country
-Living on a street
-The daycare I went to for my first ever job interview
-The home of an abusive parent
-Event Horizon

Just to name a few. There was proof that she just picked these clothes up, not picked them out, while working, and there was also proof that she did take the child to the play area. What else do you need? Ask her to either not use working hours for personal errands or ask her to call you first for permission if it bothers you. If I were you, though, I would take a step back and decide if her 5-10 minute detour in the mall is worth the process of hiring a new nanny.

The mall is the worst place on the planet for a kid. Guarantee that your nanny will be shopping while your kid is being drug along. Those play yards are disgusting!

Anonymous wrote:Not going to a mall is now living in a bubble? Nannies need to get a grip that you are being paid to do a job not go shopping. Most employers are fine with an occasional errand, especially if you work long hours, but mall shopping is completely unnecessary.

Putting "the mall" on a BANNED list of places they cannot go? Unreal.

My last MB encouraged me to take her son to the indoor play areas at the mall, so we went once a week, and occasionally (like once a month) we'd buy a special treat in the food court. Once or twice I popped into Gap and grabbed a new pair of jeans (don't have to try them on there, thanks Gap!) and maybe once or twice I handled a return at another store. Total time spent on these errands? 20 minutes out of one year of employment. If that seems unacceptable to you, I have to agree with PP, you're out of your mind. I'd like to see ANY OTHER PERSON prove they haven't spent 20 minutes of their working time on a personal call, personal email, personal chat at the coffee machine. PLEASE.

I'm an MB. I SAH a couple of days a week. When I'm home DC runs errands with me at least once a day. She's not hanging out in kid-focused activities all the time. I think it's good for her.

I can understand wanting to know if your nanny is doing personal errands, but saying that she can't seems over-the-top to me.

I agree that I'd not want a child going to a mall unnecessarily.

Not going to a mall is now living in a bubble? Nannies need to get a grip that you are being paid to do a job not go shopping. Most employers are fine with an occasional errand, especially if you work long hours, but mall shopping is completely unnecessary.

Anonymous wrote:I don't mind quick personal errands like a trip to a bank, or picking up something at a drugstore after they go to the park etc. I would not want my nanny shopping or even window shopping with my child in a shopping mall. If you allow them to go to those indoor playgrounds in the malls, I don't think you can avoid the window shopping activities. Its best to just place shopping malls on the "not allowed to go list". Those indoor mall playgrounds are filled with germs, don't get cleaned often, and aren't that stimulating anyway.

The weather is nice. I would put in place a no mall rule and have them go to outdoor parks. For rainy days, they could play in your basement or you could look into a kid gym type place instead of the mall.

Why don't you just put your kid in a bubble.
You people are out of your minds.

These threads make me so appreciative of my boss. She doesn't care if I do personal errands during the day. If I worked for someone who didn't want me looking in the clothing section of Target while I was already there doing their grocery shopping I would be looking for a new job.

I don't mind quick personal errands like a trip to a bank, or picking up something at a drugstore after they go to the park etc. I would not want my nanny shopping or even window shopping with my child in a shopping mall. If you allow them to go to those indoor playgrounds in the malls, I don't think you can avoid the window shopping activities. Its best to just place shopping malls on the "not allowed to go list". Those indoor mall playgrounds are filled with germs, don't get cleaned often, and aren't that stimulating anyway.

The weather is nice. I would put in place a no mall rule and have them go to outdoor parks. For rainy days, they could play in your basement or you could look into a kid gym type place instead of the mall.

Really??! You got a red flag just because your nanny did a little personal shopping while at the mall??

I once was watching a little boy and his mother asked me to take him to the play area at the local library, which I had no problem w/. While there, I realized I didn't have a library card and applied for one since I was there. The mother "stopped by" to see how things were and when she saw me applying for a card, she got angry. Said we were there for her son ONLY, that any personal things I had to do were to be done in my off time. Really.

Another mother asked me to stop at Target because the baby was out of diapers, so I did. While there, I noticed my favorite powder at the end of an aisle and it was on clearance so I bought some. Of course, I paid for it myself but put it in the bag w/the diapers. Well when the mother was taking out the diapers, she asked, "What's this??" and I told her I got some powder for myself and that I paid for it separately but she got angry and told me the same thing. She would "appreciate it" if I did my personal errands on my own time. WTF???

The family I work for now is pretty laid back and they could care less if I took their daughter along w/me to wash my car (she LOVES watching the car go through the water) or buying some clothes at Wal-mart. She likes me to take her daughter out and do different things every day.

If your nanny was in the area, why not let her pick her stuff up?
It would make sense so she doesn't have to go back later on and waste time and gas or train fare.

You sound too "Type A" to me OP.

Relax and enjoy the fact that you have an honest and engaging nanny who loves your son to have even bought him a little something.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do nothing with this. She was honest. And it's really FINE if a nanny takes a child to run a couple of errands that are on their way every so often. I'm a MB, and am happy for my DD to learn how to shop, how to purchase, how to interact with people properly. It's totally fine.

She wasen't honest. OP noticed the bags and nanny sensed it so that's when she said something. She didn't ask first but I can see how this might be a one time thing but at the same time I can understand OP's concern completely.

To say she wasn't honest is a bit of a stretch. It probably didn't seem like a big deal to her (which seems to be in line with most of the PPs) so she didn't mention it until it was obvious MB was looking or a comment.

I agree. I'm an MB who feels really strongly about honesty with my nanny and I don't think she was being dishonest at all. She had the bags sitting there so she certainly wasn't trying to hide anything.

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do nothing with this. She was honest. And it's really FINE if a nanny takes a child to run a couple of errands that are on their way every so often. I'm a MB, and am happy for my DD to learn how to shop, how to purchase, how to interact with people properly. It's totally fine.

She wasen't honest. OP noticed the bags and nanny sensed it so that's when she said something. She didn't ask first but I can see how this might be a one time thing but at the same time I can understand OP's concern completely.

To say she wasn't honest is a bit of a stretch. It probably didn't seem like a big deal to her (which seems to be in line with most of the PPs) so she didn't mention it until it was obvious MB was looking or a comment.

I agree. I'm an MB who feels really strongly about honesty with my nanny and I don't think she was being dishonest at all. She had the bags sitting there so she certainly wasn't trying to hide anything.