So you are using one example to lump all APs into? One German girl who was miserable? Wow...how open minded of you.

The AP is here to help. Period. To let her relax on an American holiday while you juggle it all is ridicules. FYI I don't have a husband to help me while I cook, decorate and get things ready. That's why the AP is here. To help me. Not to do it all but to help me.



At least you admit that an AP is nothing more than cheap labor who only raison d'etre is to wait on you. You chose to be a single parent, so stop griping.

NP here.

Wow, PP, that is a really mean, not to mention ridiculous, post.

You don't know why PP is a single mother, so it's pretty outrageous to say she chose it. SHe may be a widow, her partner may be deployed, you have no idea.

She also never said her AP's 'reason d'etre' is to wait on her. Do you even know what that means? What she said is that part of her AP's job is to help her on the holiday. You may think that is unfair, but stick with that, your one opinion about what is fair, instead of falsely suggesting she is treating her AP badly.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's others than PP who don't like the AP program. Me being one of them.

Then seriously, why are you here? If someone asks a question about whether the AP program is good then by all means chime in, but why do you have to derail every thread on the AP site by arguing (false info) about it? We get it - You don't like the program. Fine. But lots of us (APs and HFs) do. We are involved in the program; you're not. Why in the world are you here on the AP site?

Why are you so upset about views opposite of yours? APs serve at the mercy of the HM and this creates a modern indentured servant. The 1986 AP State Dept. rules governi.g them have never been changed to reflect the times. The US is the only country that. Allows a 45-hr week over 6 days. At the very leadt they should be paid OT for all hours over 40 per week.

NP. I think everyone gets so upset with you not because you have an opposing view but because you're extrapolating the experiences of a few to what must be true of all, because you're frequently off-base or plain wrong, because you don't indicate how you have come by these strong feelings, because you fail to see that there are many very happy au pairs, and because you sling outrageous accusations (like slavery) but then don't propose tenable solutions.

Your post here is a great example. Au pairs do not "serve at the mercy of their host moms." They are fully empowered to choose the program, to choose the family they match with, to choose to leave and go to another family at any point during the year. Au pairs are paid a stipend and provided benefits such as housing, all food, and much more. They are not paid hourly and the rate does not vary by how many hours they actually work. It doesn't make sense to say they should get paid overtime for the 5 hours - that's built into the weekly stipend. You can suggest that they shouldn't be allowed to work 45 hours or suggest that their stipend should be raised, but to say they should get overtime for the 5 hours doesn't make sense.

Good grief, it seems like there can't be a single useful thread here, what is the point of continually having the threads derailed like this? We're about to host our first au pair so we came to this forum hoping to glean useful advice and address things we might not have thought about, but this is truly ridiculous.

I guess since this forum is anonymous people just keep barging in. On other forums I'm on these people who just be banned as a troll who is just looking for trouble.

I met a HM who said she chose AP over live-in american because:

1. it's cheaper
2. they're less likely to leave with little to no notice

at least she's honest because that is 100% the main 2 reasons. it doesn't mean it's right though....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's others than PP who don't like the AP program. Me being one of them.

Then seriously, why are you here? If someone asks a question about whether the AP program is good then by all means chime in, but why do you have to derail every thread on the AP site by arguing (false info) about it? We get it - You don't like the program. Fine. But lots of us (APs and HFs) do. We are involved in the program; you're not. Why in the world are you here on the AP site?

Why are you so upset about views opposite of yours? APs serve at the mercy of the HM and this creates a modern indentured servant. The 1986 AP State Dept. rules governi.g them have never been changed to reflect the times. The US is the only country that. Allows a 45-hr week over 6 days. At the very leadt they should be paid OT for all hours over 40 per week.

Anonymous wrote:There's others than PP who don't like the AP program. Me being one of them.

Then seriously, why are you here? If someone asks a question about whether the AP program is good then by all means chime in, but why do you have to derail every thread on the AP site by arguing (false info) about it? We get it - You don't like the program. Fine. But lots of us (APs and HFs) do. We are involved in the program; you're not. Why in the world are you here on the AP site?

NP...I think the best thing to do is just to ignore and not give them attention. Focus on the topics and problems and don't respond to the negativity...

There's others than PP who don't like the AP program. Me being one of them.

Anonymous wrote:PP here about German AP

There was a huge paragraph I must have cut out by accident. The German AP told us about what life was like and she was rightfully miserable. I'm too lazy to retype it all now.

It would be wonderful if you could be too lazy to come on this site anymore. Seriously. We used to have useful discussions about hosting au pairs - where we were able to disagree about how to do it, without arguing over the merits of the program in general - until you came along and turned every query into a screed about how horrible it is to host. You seem to have no grey: in your view, hosting=exploitation. You seem to miss the point that many of us host very, very well (to the point that we remain lifelong friends with our au pairs who, yes, benefit from the program and from the cultural exchange, just as we host families do), and that the point of this board is to learn to host BETTER by seeking advice from other host parents. Every time you derail a discussion with one of your screeds, you prevent host parents from learning from each other.

So please, do everyone a favor and indulge your lazy side. Because we already get it - you don't like the AP program. You made your point. Now please go away. Thank you.