Anonymous wrote:Can't believe anyone would hire you again, but I guess there's a nanny for everyone!

I would hire OP in a hot New York minute. She would absolutely be the nanny for us. Sadly, we are not in DC or I would contact her.

Good for you OP.

Can't believe anyone would hire you again, but I guess there's a nanny for everyone!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP again.

My agency has been wonderful. I’m doing temp work right now and I’m surprised how less stressed I am. I’m working for 2 families and it’s so much more relaxed and frankly easy. I still miss the boys, and have regularly been hit with guilt and tears but I’m happy.

I’m in the late process of interviewing with a wonderful family expecting twins this month. Fingers crossed! Position wouldn’t start till February.

Also, I’ve been keeping up with the comments because I’m a glutton for punishment. I can see how other nannies could see how I may be in the wrong. That’s understandable, and I have a position in mind for you!

OP: I'm curious how you're explaining the end of your last position? Presumably your old employer isn't providing you with a rec? Were you/your agency keeping rec letters along the way? (This is not meant judgmentally at all, by the way. I think your decision to leave was totally reasonable, I'm just curious how you're handling this because a most recent/long-term employer's refusal to give a rec would be a red flag/likely deal-breaker for me as a risk-averse MB... even though I realize that at least a good percentage of the time in that scenario the old MB would be the problem.)

I was honest. They asked how my position ended and I told them the truth. I was fired. I explained the situation, and told them what I learned from it. I told them how I could have avoided it and I spoke about how now it's very important for me to always be in charge when I'm in the home. It gets too tricky when there are multiple adults and you have to guess who is responsible. They seemed understanding and receptive. Thankfully I require all my families to write a reference letter for me every year. So although I lot her as a call reference, I still have her letter from May.

I'm not hired yet. It looks good but they're interviewing several other nannies as well.

Thanks so much for the update, OP. I am a nanny who saw you 200% in the right and urged you to quit before your former employer blamed you for something more serious.
You have excellent credentials and will have no problem getting a great job. Take your time and choose carefully!

Anonymous wrote:OP again.

My agency has been wonderful. I’m doing temp work right now and I’m surprised how less stressed I am. I’m working for 2 families and it’s so much more relaxed and frankly easy. I still miss the boys, and have regularly been hit with guilt and tears but I’m happy.

I’m in the late process of interviewing with a wonderful family expecting twins this month. Fingers crossed! Position wouldn’t start till February.

Also, I’ve been keeping up with the comments because I’m a glutton for punishment. I can see how other nannies could see how I may be in the wrong. That’s understandable, and I have a position in mind for you!

OP: I'm curious how you're explaining the end of your last position? Presumably your old employer isn't providing you with a rec? Were you/your agency keeping rec letters along the way? (This is not meant judgmentally at all, by the way. I think your decision to leave was totally reasonable, I'm just curious how you're handling this because a most recent/long-term employer's refusal to give a rec would be a red flag/likely deal-breaker for me as a risk-averse MB... even though I realize that at least a good percentage of the time in that scenario the old MB would be the problem.)

Thanks for the update OP. I'm glad you are landing on your feet so easily.

I'm pretty sure the same can't be said for your former employer.

And a newborn twin position in February?! Awesome!

Have a wonderful holiday season.

- MB

Anonymous wrote:OP again.

My agency has been wonderful. I’m doing temp work right now and I’m surprised how less stressed I am. I’m working for 2 families and it’s so much more relaxed and frankly easy. I still miss the boys, and have regularly been hit with guilt and tears but I’m happy.

I’m in the late process of interviewing with a wonderful family expecting twins this month. Fingers crossed! Position wouldn’t start till February.

Also, I’ve been keeping up with the comments because I’m a glutton for punishment. I can see how other nannies could see how I may be in the wrong. That’s understandable, and I have a position in mind for you!

Wow. MB put you in an impossible position the second the whole family was there and 'helping'. She was never going to side with you vs. her family, no matter how wrong they were and unfortunately, they lost a child (6 of them!!!). I'm sorry it turned out as poorly as it did but I am glad you have found work and have an agency that is working on your behalf. Try and put it behind you.

Anonymous wrote:OP again.

My agency has been wonderful. I’m doing temp work right now and I’m surprised how less stressed I am. I’m working for 2 families and it’s so much more relaxed and frankly easy. I still miss the boys, and have regularly been hit with guilt and tears but I’m happy.

I’m in the late process of interviewing with a wonderful family expecting twins this month. Fingers crossed! Position wouldn’t start till February.

Also, I’ve been keeping up with the comments because I’m a glutton for punishment. I can see how other nannies could see how I may be in the wrong. That’s understandable, and I have a position in mind for you!

You have a great sense of humor and sense of the absurd. You'll do well in life. Thanks for the update. Merry Christmas and a Happy, healthy, and prosperous 2018 to you and your family.

OP again.

My agency has been wonderful. I’m doing temp work right now and I’m surprised how less stressed I am. I’m working for 2 families and it’s so much more relaxed and frankly easy. I still miss the boys, and have regularly been hit with guilt and tears but I’m happy.

I’m in the late process of interviewing with a wonderful family expecting twins this month. Fingers crossed! Position wouldn’t start till February.

Also, I’ve been keeping up with the comments because I’m a glutton for punishment. I can see how other nannies could see how I may be in the wrong. That’s understandable, and I have a position in mind for you!

A nanny's authority should always be Paramount to all extended family. If Grandma is upset, tough.

How are you, OP?[b]

Okay, I've stayed out of this until now, but here's my two cents:

There's no perfect solution for every family. We're nannies, we know that things change from family to family.

Best solution would have been for OP to clarify about leaving the house (short and long periods) when asked to stay in the background. Personally, I would also asked that OP clarify for ALL adults that OP would be at home all day, doing xyz tasks, and if family needed a break or OP felt there was imminent danger, she would resume control of the situation.

However, some MBs would have issues with asking for clarification even at that point.

I've had families fit whom I was always the authority when family was there. Other families wanted me a back up in case of an emergency. Others wanted to pretend to their families that I was in the background, but I had to find subtle ways to keep the schedule (hey, grandma, kids' food is on the table, do you want me to help feed them before their nap?). You have to make an educated guess based on knowledge of the family.

Anonymous wrote:If my nanny ever called me to ask if my mother could take my SN son and daughter for a walk with five other adult family members after I told her to take a backseat, I would be furious.

I have had the same wonderful nanny for nearly seven years and I can say without hesitation that OP's MB was dead wrong.

Troll

If my nanny ever called me to ask if my mother could take my SN son and daughter for a walk with five other adult family members after I told her to take a backseat, I would be furious.

I have had the same wonderful nanny for nearly seven years and I can say without hesitation that OP's MB was dead wrong.