Anonymous wrote:No way. No way.

Men are the most common girl gender for abuse and violence. No way I’d expose my kids to that. It’s like getting a dog and buying a pit bull.

Why don’t you tell us about the patriarchy again ...

Anonymous wrote:We have four kids: two middle school aged boys and two early elementary aged girls (6.5 & 8.5). We’ve interviewed a male au pair we like, but we’re still a bit undecided about whether we’re comfortable having a male au pair rather than female. My husband is probably more uncomfortable about this than I am, but I admit I’m not 100% certain either. Please share thoughts, or please share your experiences if you’ve hosted a male au pair caring for female host kids. Thanks!

Too young. I would wait a couple of years for a male. We had our first kale at those ages (for boys) and unless the kids are really, really into sports it is not worth it that young.
If your kids are first team travel for soccer or basketball or whatever then may be worth it. We went back to a female for 7 & 9; as our male was awesome for guy stuff but weak on most everything else; like laundry, being clean, etc.

We have a male ap and are open to both male or female. Depends on the candidate. Our males have actually been higher maintenance in a way because most families do not allow males in their home. So all the APs hang out at our house (makes and females).
It is ok, but at least our female aps seemed to rotate where to hang out. Our males do not get that option.

For the kids our males are definitely better for sports, almost too good as our kids have become noticeably more competitive and focus on winning more.
We are a soccer and basketball house for school aged boys and girl.

We also have 4 children. One son and 3 daughters that are in elementary school and youngest daughter in preschool. We have had a female the last 2 years but just matched with a male au pair. We liked him bc of attributes unrelated to being male. Our lcc said once her families have male au pairs they usually stay with males. We are looking forward to his arrival. I did think about how you don’t hear much about female pedophiles. However, I know we are a tough match with all the kids and we believe the background of this young man really can handle the craziness!

No way. No way.

Men are the most common girl gender for abuse and violence. No way I’d expose my kids to that. It’s like getting a dog and buying a pit bull.

I remember what my brother was like at 19, no thank you!! Women face far more discrimination in jobs, I have zero problem not wanting Male nannies or (eye roll) bro pairs.

Anonymous wrote:We have four kids: two middle school aged boys and two early elementary aged girls (6.5 & 8.5). We’ve interviewed a male au pair we like, but we’re still a bit undecided about whether we’re comfortable having a male au pair rather than female. My husband is probably more uncomfortable about this than I am, but I admit I’m not 100% certain either. Please share thoughts, or please share your experiences if you’ve hosted a male au pair caring for female host kids. Thanks!

You really need to interview the candidates and figure out if the PERSON is right for your family. It will not be as easy as you think to find an AP willing to take on 4 kids, and a smaller pool of males. If the one male you liked is interested in your family that is great - go for it!

I have not been worried about a male AP in our home with the children; really the only drama/concerns we have had is if they knock up any APs in their cluster/etc.

We have not had any child related concerns; but most have been rather "active" in an area with so many female APs.

I take issue with the stereotype that male aps are no drama. We have had more drama with our male Ap than any of the 6 women we hosted. Mainly related to lack of ability to see what to do, even with clear instructions. I know it depends on the individual, not the sex, but male does not guarantee no drama, which is the virtue I always hear on these boards.

I personally would not get one in your situation, but I think it is reasonable to do so if you find the right one.