Anonymous
Post 01/17/2019 11:01     Subject: Good AuPair experiences

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I love the program because of flexibility and cultural exchange but as an experienced host mom who also has a 5 mo baby and kindergartener, I do NOT and would NEVER make an AP the primary caregiver for the baby. Caring for a baby is too grueling, and the schedule you propose too hard. Unless you start work at noon or something.



Can I ask why you would never make the AuPair responsible for the baby? This would be her primary responsibility. She would be other both children approx 1 hour per before I get home from work. From all of the Community Counselors I have consulted with they just recommend getting an older AuPair with one on one infant experience.


NP, get a mature AP and you will be fine. My Brazillian AP has a lot of AP friends taking care of infants and they love it, most extend. They love taking care of sweet little baby who don't talk back! Start looking early and get the one who are 22+ and have a lot of experience with baby. Good luck!
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2019 10:50     Subject: Good AuPair experiences

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I love the program because of flexibility and cultural exchange but as an experienced host mom who also has a 5 mo baby and kindergartener, I do NOT and would NEVER make an AP the primary caregiver for the baby. Caring for a baby is too grueling, and the schedule you propose too hard. Unless you start work at noon or something.



Can I ask why you would never make the AuPair responsible for the baby? This would be her primary responsibility. She would be other both children approx 1 hour per before I get home from work. From all of the Community Counselors I have consulted with they just recommend getting an older AuPair with one on one infant experience.


Do you remember life with a baby? Where they cry on end for no reason? Where they won't sleep when you want them to and won't eat when you want them to? Remember how frustrating it was for you, as the parent? And how there were days when you didn't think you'd make it? The AP is younger, less experienced, and less motivated to be patient/kind/loving because it's not their kid. They may do dangerous things (even inadvertently) and you'd never know because the baby can't talk. They may do things the way they were taught (sure, baby can have a blanket -- I did! -- and look, baby is sleeping!) And when they have to watch both kids it could be worse.


All of this plus if AP has to pick up younger child WITH the baby (driving with screaming baby or walking in traffic with child and baby) sounds pretty risky to me. I let my AP drive both kids on rare occasions but not as a daily routine.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2019 09:30     Subject: Good AuPair experiences

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I love the program because of flexibility and cultural exchange but as an experienced host mom who also has a 5 mo baby and kindergartener, I do NOT and would NEVER make an AP the primary caregiver for the baby. Caring for a baby is too grueling, and the schedule you propose too hard. Unless you start work at noon or something.



Can I ask why you would never make the AuPair responsible for the baby? This would be her primary responsibility. She would be other both children approx 1 hour per before I get home from work. From all of the Community Counselors I have consulted with they just recommend getting an older AuPair with one on one infant experience.


Do you remember life with a baby? Where they cry on end for no reason? Where they won't sleep when you want them to and won't eat when you want them to? Remember how frustrating it was for you, as the parent? And how there were days when you didn't think you'd make it? The AP is younger, less experienced, and less motivated to be patient/kind/loving because it's not their kid. They may do dangerous things (even inadvertently) and you'd never know because the baby can't talk. They may do things the way they were taught (sure, baby can have a blanket -- I did! -- and look, baby is sleeping!) And when they have to watch both kids it could be worse.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2019 06:38     Subject: Re:Good AuPair experiences

AP host mom here and I also wouldn’t get an AP to watch a baby.
Anonymous
Post 01/16/2019 20:50     Subject: Good AuPair experiences

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I love the program because of flexibility and cultural exchange but as an experienced host mom who also has a 5 mo baby and kindergartener, I do NOT and would NEVER make an AP the primary caregiver for the baby. Caring for a baby is too grueling, and the schedule you propose too hard. Unless you start work at noon or something.



Can I ask why you would never make the AuPair responsible for the baby? This would be her primary responsibility. She would be other both children approx 1 hour per before I get home from work. From all of the Community Counselors I have consulted with they just recommend getting an older AuPair with one on one infant experience.


My experience with au pairs, basically. I suggest viewing au pairs like teenage or college babysitters. Think back to your peers when you were a HS senior or college student. Would you say many of them would do well at young baby care as a full time job? Would they exercise the kind of judgment with a baby as you now expect? Or were they self-involved, cut corners, dismissive of elaborate instructions?


I used to be one of those people who thought careful matching would mitigate this issue with a baby. Nope. Our APs have been bad or barely competent with the baby while good to great with older toddlers. If you get a decent one with the baby, it’s pure luck.