Anonymous wrote:Dear nannies: You ARE the "help." You are NOT your employer's financial equal. Either you don't have the intelligence, work ethic, and hutzpah to go get yourself a more lucrative career or you enjoy being just a nanny for one of many valid reasons (you like the kids, you like the more flexible days, etc.). But your boss is your boss and is not obligated to treat you like their peer just to salve your ego. You are there to do a job. Do it well and they will realize that tou have a unique and amazing skillset and will value you for it. Spend your time complaining that they don't hand you peer-status on a silver platter and you will always be thought of as a glorified babysitter.

Dear DCUM trollie,
Could you be any more obvious? The use of the term "the help" gave you away. Sorry, not biting.
Kisses,
Long-time poster

Dear nannies: You ARE the "help." You are NOT your employer's financial equal. Either you don't have the intelligence, work ethic, and hutzpah to go get yourself a more lucrative career or you enjoy being just a nanny for one of many valid reasons (you like the kids, you like the more flexible days, etc.). But your boss is your boss and is not obligated to treat you like their peer just to salve your ego. You are there to do a job. Do it well and they will realize that tou have a unique and amazing skillset and will value you for it. Spend your time complaining that they don't hand you peer-status on a silver platter and you will always be thought of as a glorified babysitter.

I can see both sides of the argument. If I were a nanny, I would be insulted and a little humiliated to be put up at a motel while my employers were living it up at a 5 star resort... it just smacks of
"upstairs, downstairs." OTOH, at my old job as an attorney, I sometimes traveled with my boss who would travel in better style than I did, e.g., Business Class vs. Coach. We would stay at the same hotel out of convenience, but I wouldn't have raised an eyebrow if he stayed at the Ritz while I stayed at the Courtyard Marriott. He made a s8*tload more $$ than I do and if he wanted to lavish it on himself, fine, I wouldn't expect him to do the same for me! I can see how there's baggage tied to the "help" nature of the relationship, but look at other employers and employees, it is so NBD to have the boss fly First while employee flies Coach, boss stay at 5 star while employee stays at 3 star, etc.

I think the biggest mistake these MB/DB made was that they weren't upfront with their temp nanny about the situation. I personally would not travel with our nanny unless I was prepared to put her up at the same place and have her fly the same class, but frankly, I would not have the same qualms about a temp nanny. As to the distance between hotels, we live in a walking city and it is NBD to walk 15 minutes to your job. I would clear this with the temp beforehand, but not expect this to be a red button issue.

This is a tough one, especially in this country, with so much history of segregation, separate entrances for "help," etc. If you were at a 4-start hotel next door, it would be hard to complain, although they would hardly win best employer award. But putting you up at a motel demonstrates either that they are tone deaf when it comes to social manners (best case scenario), or that they enjoy the fact that they have help staying outside of their fancy venue (worst case scenario).

If this were me, I would provide great childcare service but would definitely speak up about how the arrangement made me feel and I might ask them how they arrived at the decision. Let them think about this while on vacation. *evil grin*

Let's put it this way- in industry, most company poliy says everyone Vice President and below stays at 3 star hotels- like Marriott, Hilton, basically less than $200 or $250/night.

Why would you think you are entitled to stay at the Langham? Only our CEO and top management are allowed to stay there.

They probably made their original reservation months ago. It is still Spring Break timing, so most 4-5star hotels are booked up (or going for $600+/night.

There's a good chance there was no availability left at the hotel, so they found a close by nice hotel.

Is it any worse than a hotel you would pay for yourself if you went on vacation?

So I also think it's fine. However, they should be paying for your Ubers to/from their hotel.

Anonymous wrote:Well, this is going to show the kind of MB I am, but except for the part where you got blindsided with it, I don't see the problem.

You're an employee, not grandma, and not even a full time long term employee. They are not obligated to spend a fortune on your accommodations. Enjoy the perks while you're hanging out with the children during the day, and enjoy being too far away to be on call in the evening.

You must be OP's MB!

Well, this is going to show the kind of MB I am, but except for the part where you got blindsided with it, I don't see the problem.

You're an employee, not grandma, and not even a full time long term employee. They are not obligated to spend a fortune on your accommodations. Enjoy the perks while you're hanging out with the children during the day, and enjoy being too far away to be on call in the evening.

Anonymous wrote:It is wrong. End of discussion. I am an MB and I would never, ever do this to my nanny or any temp nanny!!!

Make them provide transportation for you, OP, as well as cover every single meal you have when you are not with them.

I like how you think you are judge and jury.

You are an idiot. End of discussion.

Anonymous wrote:I would be offended only to not have access to plush hotel beddings, high end lotions and the room service!!!!???? Hum how awful of them!!! Otherwise enjoy the little distance you have from the job.

You're an idiot.

It is wrong. End of discussion. I am an MB and I would never, ever do this to my nanny or any temp nanny!!!

Make them provide transportation for you, OP, as well as cover every single meal you have when you are not with them.

I would be offended only to not have access to plush hotel beddings, high end lotions and the room service!!!!???? Hum how awful of them!!! Otherwise enjoy the little distance you have from the job.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one who sees no issue here? It makes sense for a family to spring for a 5-star room for thwir long-term nanny as it is a perk of the job, but for a temp? You are there to do a very specific job and they are required to give you the needed tools to do that job, treat you with courtesy and pay you as agreed. I do think they should have clarified the transportation issue beforehand.
--fellow nanny

It looks like you are. And staying at the 5-star hotel is not a perq of a permanent job, it's what is expected when you are employing a travel nanny, temp or not.
--MB who brings a travel nanny

I am surprised at these answers. I agree that you should always get details in writing, especially with a family you don't know well. I really don't see why they should be required to house you in their hotel. If there is something wrong with the motel (not clean or safe), then that's a separate issue, but if it is just a typical cheap, functional hotel and you feel entitled to extra ammenities then that seems pretty silly to me. It's not your vacation; it's theirs. The commute factor would be an issue, but again the main problem is that they didn't discuss it sooner.

I don't think it's so weird not to put your temp nanny up in a 5 star resort as long as the accommodations are adequate. I do think it's weird not to tell her in advance. Similarly, if it's a distance I'd walk myself under similar conditions (so, 1 mile or less and with actual sidewalks), I'd never assume I had to provide transport for the nanny.

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one who sees no issue here? It makes sense for a family to spring for a 5-star room for thwir long-term nanny as it is a perk of the job, but for a temp? You are there to do a very specific job and they are required to give you the needed tools to do that job, treat you with courtesy and pay you as agreed. I do think they should have clarified the transportation issue beforehand.
--fellow nanny

It looks like you are. And staying at the 5-star hotel is not a perq of a permanent job, it's what is expected when you are employing a travel nanny, temp or not.
--MB who brings a travel nanny