Anonymous
01/19/2017 22:00
Subject: Re:Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
Anonymous wrote:This is OP again. Two things affected my decision about the lack of shoulder strap being a huge safety issue - 1. I have NEVER EVER seen an under 2 not fully buckled into a stroller and know literally dozens of kids around DC's age. This could be a local thing. I think parents here are A Lot more uptight about safety than probably 99% of the country just because you hear of bad things happening to kids all time. Nanny used to work in the suburbs so I can excuse her not knowing what the local norms are. 2. The nanny has disregarded my safety instructions before. I asked nanny to not dress DC on top of the dresser/changing pad, saying DC should not needlessly be seated at that height, and the very next week, I came home to find him sitting on the edge of the kitchen counter! (FYI I don't think dressing the kid on the dresser is a huge no-no, I just prefer it not be done there) This was actually worse because unlike when dressing DC, she was not paying her full attention to DC as she was cleaning the kitchen. Given I specifically said not to seat DC at that height, I was really baffled by this. I also previously told nanny that she should use the high chair if she ever needed to keep DC confined / safe (e.g., DC keeps trying to touch hot stove). The high chair is literally right next to where she seated DC...! I have other examples, too. Anyway, these kinds of incidents I guess have sensitized me to nanny's attention to safety.
Seating a 20-month old on the counter without having at least eyes and preferably hands on him is much more cut-and-dried. If you have consistent concerns about safety, find someone new.
Anonymous
01/19/2017 20:37
Subject: Re:Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
This is OP again. Two things affected my decision about the lack of shoulder strap being a huge safety issue - 1. I have NEVER EVER seen an under 2 not fully buckled into a stroller and know literally dozens of kids around DC's age. This could be a local thing. I think parents here are A Lot more uptight about safety than probably 99% of the country just because you hear of bad things happening to kids all time. Nanny used to work in the suburbs so I can excuse her not knowing what the local norms are. 2. The nanny has disregarded my safety instructions before. I asked nanny to not dress DC on top of the dresser/changing pad, saying DC should not needlessly be seated at that height, and the very next week, I came home to find him sitting on the edge of the kitchen counter! (FYI I don't think dressing the kid on the dresser is a huge no-no, I just prefer it not be done there) This was actually worse because unlike when dressing DC, she was not paying her full attention to DC as she was cleaning the kitchen. Given I specifically said not to seat DC at that height, I was really baffled by this. I also previously told nanny that she should use the high chair if she ever needed to keep DC confined / safe (e.g., DC keeps trying to touch hot stove). The high chair is literally right next to where she seated DC...! I have other examples, too. Anyway, these kinds of incidents I guess have sensitized me to nanny's attention to safety.
Anonymous
01/19/2017 18:31
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:MB here.
You have a right to make your expectations clear to the nanny and to have her follow your guidelines. Whether or not people here agree w/ your position isn't the core issue - if you have clearly expressed your position and your nanny disregards your clear wishes, then that becomes grounds for firing.
As for the specifics, I would not be concerned about my 20 month old only having a lap belt on in a stroller. But that's me - that doesn't make your stance less valid.
Nanny here and I agree with this MB
Even if the nanny does not agree with the mom, and thinks the mom is crazy, she works for her and should respect the request. OP has a right to her view of safety and as a nanny myself, Safety is of the greatest concern and I actually agree with the OP, be safe, even one time the child could get hurt is one to many especially when it can be prevented
No one is saying that the nanny shouldn't follow instructions. We are saying that if OP is assuming this is a huge sign that nanny is incompetent or does not value safety then OP needs to calm down, because this is a definite gray area where reasonable adults can disagree.
Anonymous
01/19/2017 15:52
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
OP-I need to tell you the truth.
You have serious problems.
a 20 month old does not need the shoulder strap when riding the stroller.
I am mesmerized.
You have serious problems.
a 20 month old does not need the shoulder strap when riding the stroller.
I am mesmerized.
Anonymous
01/19/2017 13:34
Subject: Re:Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
OP again. Thanks everyone for the replies. I had no idea that it was fairly normal/common for a child DC's age not to be fully buckled in. I have seen this with older kids, but not with an under two. In that case, I agree it is not a fire-able offense and I will just tell nanny to buckle DC in completely going forward.
Anonymous
01/19/2017 10:58
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
I am a mom. Learning experience. It's hard to find a perfect nanny without downsides. You cannot clone yourself.
Anonymous
01/19/2017 10:43
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:MB here.
You have a right to make your expectations clear to the nanny and to have her follow your guidelines. Whether or not people here agree w/ your position isn't the core issue - if you have clearly expressed your position and your nanny disregards your clear wishes, then that becomes grounds for firing.
As for the specifics, I would not be concerned about my 20 month old only having a lap belt on in a stroller. But that's me - that doesn't make your stance less valid.
Nanny here and I agree with this MB
Even if the nanny does not agree with the mom, and thinks the mom is crazy, she works for her and should respect the request. OP has a right to her view of safety and as a nanny myself, Safety is of the greatest concern and I actually agree with the OP, be safe, even one time the child could get hurt is one to many especially when it can be prevented
I don't think anyone is disagreeing with this. I think everyone is telling the OP that she is overreacting by acting like this was a major lapse in judgement for the nanny.
Anonymous
01/19/2017 10:09
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
Anonymous wrote:MB here.
You have a right to make your expectations clear to the nanny and to have her follow your guidelines. Whether or not people here agree w/ your position isn't the core issue - if you have clearly expressed your position and your nanny disregards your clear wishes, then that becomes grounds for firing.
As for the specifics, I would not be concerned about my 20 month old only having a lap belt on in a stroller. But that's me - that doesn't make your stance less valid.
Nanny here and I agree with this MB
Even if the nanny does not agree with the mom, and thinks the mom is crazy, she works for her and should respect the request. OP has a right to her view of safety and as a nanny myself, Safety is of the greatest concern and I actually agree with the OP, be safe, even one time the child could get hurt is one to many especially when it can be prevented
Anonymous
01/19/2017 08:35
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
I wouldn't fire your nanny over this. It's BARELY a safety issue, and you just said she's normally really good about bringing up her concerns to you. Just tell her you'd feel better if she used both buckles, then let it go and chill out a little bit in the future.
Anonymous
01/19/2017 08:31
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
Is this a stroller? The child is almost 2?
Um, I'm pretty insane about safety, and would fire a nanny on the spot for any carseat mistakes, but let this go.
Gently say you'd prefer he'd secured all the way, but totally not a fire able mistake.
Um, I'm pretty insane about safety, and would fire a nanny on the spot for any carseat mistakes, but let this go.
Gently say you'd prefer he'd secured all the way, but totally not a fire able mistake.
Anonymous
01/18/2017 23:38
Subject: Re:Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
If you would like your little one to always be strapped, tell her. Many, many 20 month olds are climbing in and out of their own strollers and are not strapped at all. I expect a nanny to be more cautious than a parent, but this is not abnormal. Now, if you tell her you would like your kid strapped in always and show her how to do it and she still ignores you, then that is a problem.
Anonymous
01/18/2017 23:16
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
If you directly instruct her to fully buckle him up from now on & she fully complies then I would still give her a chance.
However if she continues doing things her own way, then the obvious reaction would be to let her go.
Re: Safety....All parents + Nannies have things they personally prioritize to keep the child safe.
One parent may not let child stand up while they push the stroller while another may.
It's all about differentiating parenting styles and no two are ever exact to the core.
However if she continues doing things her own way, then the obvious reaction would be to let her go.
Re: Safety....All parents + Nannies have things they personally prioritize to keep the child safe.
One parent may not let child stand up while they push the stroller while another may.
It's all about differentiating parenting styles and no two are ever exact to the core.
Anonymous
01/18/2017 22:18
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
MB here.
You have a right to make your expectations clear to the nanny and to have her follow your guidelines. Whether or not people here agree w/ your position isn't the core issue - if you have clearly expressed your position and your nanny disregards your clear wishes, then that becomes grounds for firing.
As for the specifics, I would not be concerned about my 20 month old only having a lap belt on in a stroller. But that's me - that doesn't make your stance less valid.
You have a right to make your expectations clear to the nanny and to have her follow your guidelines. Whether or not people here agree w/ your position isn't the core issue - if you have clearly expressed your position and your nanny disregards your clear wishes, then that becomes grounds for firing.
As for the specifics, I would not be concerned about my 20 month old only having a lap belt on in a stroller. But that's me - that doesn't make your stance less valid.
Anonymous
01/18/2017 21:46
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
The lap belt is plenty at that age. If you disagree, then that's fine. Just ask her politely to do it your way. But my guess is that there will be some other "safety hazard" you deem fireable pretty soon. Might want to look into daycare.
Anonymous
01/18/2017 21:44
Subject: Learning experience or reason to fire nanny?
this is why we call people trolls so often because if OP is really someones MB, whew!
OP you said you like your nanny otherwise, but would FIRE her and have to get your child accustomed to an entire new person on top of the search process over a seatbelt in a stroller? and for a 20 month old no less. I agree with the others that if this were the car Id have a stern talking to but this seems quite ridiculous. But you may be doing the girl a favor. who knows?
OP you said you like your nanny otherwise, but would FIRE her and have to get your child accustomed to an entire new person on top of the search process over a seatbelt in a stroller? and for a 20 month old no less. I agree with the others that if this were the car Id have a stern talking to but this seems quite ridiculous. But you may be doing the girl a favor. who knows?