Oh, OP, I know what you mean! I had an old car and every time I thought of selling it for a new one, I felt disloyal.

But. You must think of it as phases in your life, and your childcare life. You needed a nanny at the beginning. Now you need full day preschool for your son. When he goes to elementary school, you'll need a different form of childcare around his school hours.

You had a great run, you love your nanny, you'll give the best reference, your nanny will be loved by you and your son forever (and could babysit very occasionally on weekends to keep in touch, be invited to birthday parties as a guest, etc, depending on what you want and what she wants) but now it's time.

Look for a fabulous full day preschool program that is open full days! It will be exciting to move into this phase of your life.

And then enjoy the renovations (or not, LOL)!

Anonymous wrote:Everyone's different but I'd keep the nanny and the pre school. Especially if this is your one and only child, the situation is temporary. Even if you did this another 1-2 years that really isn't much time in the grand scheme of things. I'd talk to the nanny about whether she is interested in adding some additional tasks to her responsibilities (like grocery shopping, light meal prep), given the additional down time.

Agree - just suck it up for 2 more years....

Everyone's different but I'd keep the nanny and the pre school. Especially if this is your one and only child, the situation is temporary. Even if you did this another 1-2 years that really isn't much time in the grand scheme of things. I'd talk to the nanny about whether she is interested in adding some additional tasks to her responsibilities (like grocery shopping, light meal prep), given the additional down time.

Anonymous wrote:Why not just go with a full day preschool program? I know you and your son love your nanny, but it might be time for a new childcare solution.

Or do you like the idea of your child having "lazy home days" and then more structured preschool days? Then you'll have to stay with this solution for another year or so.

An au pair is less expensive each week, but there are other costs (the agency fee, etc) and you also have a young adult living with you. In your house. Always. Not everyoen is ready to have another person in their home that they must "manage" and even to a tiny extent (depending on the au pair and the issues) "parent". I couldn't do it, but many do. Also remember usually your au pair will be with you only 1 year, so you must get a new one every year, which means you search for a new one, have the transition to learnign someone new, etc.

OP here. full day preschool sounds most likely (we live in an older house that doesn't have a ton of extra space, so an au pair would be uncomfortable). I know this sounds weird, but one of the reasons we are staying with our nanny is that we feel so loyal to her and cannot imagine getting rid of her. She has been wonderful in helping us raise our son and has become like part of the family.

Why not just go with a full day preschool program? I know you and your son love your nanny, but it might be time for a new childcare solution.

Or do you like the idea of your child having "lazy home days" and then more structured preschool days? Then you'll have to stay with this solution for another year or so.

An au pair is less expensive each week, but there are other costs (the agency fee, etc) and you also have a young adult living with you. In your house. Always. Not everyoen is ready to have another person in their home that they must "manage" and even to a tiny extent (depending on the au pair and the issues) "parent". I couldn't do it, but many do. Also remember usually your au pair will be with you only 1 year, so you must get a new one every year, which means you search for a new one, have the transition to learnign someone new, etc.

If you have the space, I would look into getting the au pair.

A share would save you around 30% of what you currently pay your Nanny, but there are a few issues:

Would you paid with a family that has a child close in age to yours or with an infant/todler. Kids in a share that are close in age are generally an easier share set up. They can take the same art class, can nap/rest at the same time, etc. With kids of different ages, you have a sibling style situation, with an infant being carted to a class for the preschooler - Wil the infant's parents be ok with that? Or would you be ok having your child miss classes and activities so baby can stay on a good nap schedule?

A same age share would allow Nanny to do some chores like grocery shopping and laundry for BOTH families, while still being available in case a child is ill or school is closed.

A different age share will not allow for nanny to run errands during school unless the infant/toddler's parents agree to that. And if they do agree to that, expect them to want to pay Nanny less and you to pay more.

As a nanny I think your best solution is to talk to Nanny about how you each see her role evolving with your child in school.

If you propose she do grocery shopping, run errands, and do kid related stuff like clearing out toys/books/clothes that have been outgrown with out a child around, she may happily accept. That would leave more time for you to spend with your child.

But if she just wants to be "on call" with no additional duties, oh may choose o lo at other childcare options.

Op I am in almost the exact same boat as you! Our DD has had the same nanny since about 3 months and she is now 2.5. She attends preschool 2 days a week and other classes (library and MyGym) the other 3 so she does have something ever day. We are EXTREMELY stretched and barely make it each month but I have decided to suck it up until our DD is five and in public school. However, I do like the advice about finding a share.

Anonymous wrote:Who goes in when it's the family's turn to work in the coop?

We have co-op duties once a month, so husband and I rotate.