Well it may be that she is great with younger children but not as good with older ones. It may be that as she is aging what came easily to her is more of a challenge now. It may be that 3 kids at older ages is more of a challenge than one or multiples who are younger might be. Etc...

I went through this with our nanny, though we went through it sooner. But our first nanny was absolutely brilliant and a wonderful caregiver for 3 years. But when our kids (twins) starting really hitting the advanced toddler/preschooler stages it clearly was getting to be too much for her. She also had been a nanny for more than 20 years, but she was turning 60 and definitely slowing down a bit. (That wasn't an issue with babies, but became a major factor w/ two kids running around at full tile.)

She started losing her patience in ways she never had before, yelling a lot more, seeming unhappy and depressed, etc... The kids were not getting enough positive stimulation or exercise and it was difficult all around.

We ended up letting her go and replacing her w/ a much younger nanny and part time preschool.

Our former nanny is now a rockstar again (with an infant) and she is infinitely happier. Our kids have more age appropriately skilled care and they are happier. And I (the mom) cannot tell you how relieved I am to have this all happily resolved. We still have a great relationship w/ the first nanny but now it is a better situation all around.

Sometimes what was a great fit no longer works - through no one's fault. It's ok to acknowledge that and move on.

Good luck!

Anonymous wrote:I don't think the nanny is a professional, is she?

OP here - She's been a nanny for over 20 years. At first she seemed to have it under control. But lately it has been getting worse (Ie. the yelling and threatening). Her references were all stellar so not sure what's going on? Regardless I'll update once we have a talk with her about expectations and treatment...