Anonymous wrote:"nannydebsays wrote:
Know a nanny who interviewed with parents of infant twins, and was <GASP!> honest about being a newlywed and hoping to have a baby at some point. The employers hired her on the condition that she delay trying until the infant twins were 18 months old. She did, and is still with them today, 5+ years down the road.

She even <HORRORS!> brings her child to work with her, and has since her child was 6 weeks old. And she didn't have her pay cut and has gotten RAISES in the last years of being a nanny/mom.

So it can be done with mature communication, clear expectations, and a nanny who is willing to accept that her child will be treated as the youngest sibling, having to accommodate and adjust to the employer's kids schedules.

Imagine that. What say the short-sighted selfish parents on this forum who prefer to fire a nanny??"

People do not PREFER to fire a nanny; but not all employers want a nanny to bring her child along. They are paying top dollar for childcare to have exclusive focus on their kid/s.

Helicopter care (parent or nanny) tends to result in an avalanche of problems. You should really read up on that.

nannydebsays wrote:Know a nanny who interviewed with parents of infant twins, and was <GASP!> honest about being a newlywed and hoping to have a baby at some point. The employers hired her on the condition that she delay trying until the infant twins were 18 months old. She did, and is still with them today, 5+ years down the road.

She even <HORRORS!> brings her child to work with her, and has since her child was 6 weeks old. And she didn't have her pay cut and has gotten RAISES in the last years of being a nanny/mom.

So it can be done with mature communication, clear expectations, and a nanny who is willing to accept that her child will be treated as the youngest sibling, having to accommodate and adjust to the employer's kids schedules.

This nanny was willing to put her family plans on hold for the job, not get pregnant next day after getting hired. So by info above the kids would be about 2.5 and in preschool by the time baby came along so easier to manage. And good for the nanny willing to schelp her baby around her nanny family's needs.

If a nanny brings up her plans to get pregnant during the interview, she has opened the door to discuss her plans and I would definitely follow up and ask her how a pregnancy would impact her job. If the nanny had a solid plan for working during her pregnancy and after the birth, I would still consider hiring her.

I would not be willing to have her bring her child to work, so if she mentioned that, or had not thought out the implications of pregnancy on her ability to her job, I would not hire her.

I want to know she is committed to the job and has a solid plan for balancing her job with her personal life.

Hmm. I think that anyone hiring a female should be prepared for her to get pregnant at any point. It is not your job to police it and if she gets pregnant as op's husband said you have 9 months to figure your arrangements out

"nannydebsays wrote:
Know a nanny who interviewed with parents of infant twins, and was <GASP!> honest about being a newlywed and hoping to have a baby at some point. The employers hired her on the condition that she delay trying until the infant twins were 18 months old. She did, and is still with them today, 5+ years down the road.

She even <HORRORS!> brings her child to work with her, and has since her child was 6 weeks old. And she didn't have her pay cut and has gotten RAISES in the last years of being a nanny/mom.

So it can be done with mature communication, clear expectations, and a nanny who is willing to accept that her child will be treated as the youngest sibling, having to accommodate and adjust to the employer's kids schedules.

Imagine that. What say the short-sighted selfish parents on this forum who prefer to fire a nanny??"

People do not PREFER to fire a nanny; but not all employers want a nanny to bring her child along. They are paying top dollar for childcare to have exclusive focus on their kid/s.

nannydebsays wrote:Know a nanny who interviewed with parents of infant twins, and was <GASP!> honest about being a newlywed and hoping to have a baby at some point. The employers hired her on the condition that she delay trying until the infant twins were 18 months old. She did, and is still with them today, 5+ years down the road.

She even <HORRORS!> brings her child to work with her, and has since her child was 6 weeks old. And she didn't have her pay cut and has gotten RAISES in the last years of being a nanny/mom.

So it can be done with mature communication, clear expectations, and a nanny who is willing to accept that her child will be treated as the youngest sibling, having to accommodate and adjust to the employer's kids schedules.

Imagine that. What say the short-sighted selfish parents on this forum who prefer to fire a nanny??

Know a nanny who interviewed with parents of infant twins, and was <GASP!> honest about being a newlywed and hoping to have a baby at some point. The employers hired her on the condition that she delay trying until the infant twins were 18 months old. She did, and is still with them today, 5+ years down the road.

She even <HORRORS!> brings her child to work with her, and has since her child was 6 weeks old. And she didn't have her pay cut and has gotten RAISES in the last years of being a nanny/mom.

So it can be done with mature communication, clear expectations, and a nanny who is willing to accept that her child will be treated as the youngest sibling, having to accommodate and adjust to the employer's kids schedules.

MB here. Given the additional info OP, I wouldn't hire her. It sounds like she knows it might not be the best choice for her, you know it might not be the best choice for you, but both of you are acting in great faith. Which is terrific.

So I'd keep looking.

If you hire her, you and she together need to craft a fairly detailed maternity policy, including everything from how appointments will be managed, what to do if she is missing too much work or is given restrictions, how much leave (paid or unpaid), bringing baby to work (or not), and under what circumstances she would not be paid, or would have to involuntarily stop working.

OP here. Appreciate the responses. It is a fair point that my current employer hired me and then I went and got pregnant, but of course there are many other employees in my office who can cover for me in my absence. Also, I can work remotely. Anyway, I will keep that perspective in mind. I am a lawyer, so we are aware of the discrimination laws.

To add additional context on why our nanny candidate said what she said, she currently has another job not as a nanny, and we would be hiring her away from that job. She is weighing whether to accept, and it seems that one of her considerations for herself is the fact that she is trying to get pregnant and isn't sure it would be the right move to leave her current situation, come to us, and find herself pregnant right away. I also think she was trying to be fair to us. As someone who doesn't have much of a filter either, I get it.

My primary concern isn't the pregnancy or the maternity leave. It's really what happens when the baby is born. We need at least 50 hours/week and honestly I don't feel great about hiring a mom away from her own kids to look after mine. I've been shy about interviewing other candidates where I know they have young kids for that reason. I'm not categorically opposed to her bringing her own child along, I just don't know anything about that sort of arrangement so haven't given it much thought.

Anonymous wrote:This is ridiculous..She was being honest. Most pregnant women are healthy throughout theit pregnancies and can lift just fine. There's no guarantee about having the same nanny for years. Nannies could get fired or let go because of circumstances whether their own or their bosses. I have seen alot of mb's having children so close together, where the one is barely walking and they're heavily pregnant again. Do we now tell them they can't do that because of whatever illnesses may happen in the 3rd trimester..no one knows how they will feel or the limitations until they get to that part of their pregnancies and you may have overlooked an excellent nanny for your kids based on assumptions

See my post below about my nanny with a healthy pregnancy who won't lift my toddler.

Okay - why would any woman volunteer the information that she was trying to get pregnant to any employer?!! It is like saying, "Yes, I am trying to be overtired and nauseated for three months, followed by being extremely emotional and uncomfortable - then I will take another three months off." It is insane for any job but especially for a nanny position where the employers NEED to have you replaced permanently or temporarily when you are delivering and recovering from birth to they cannot go to work!