Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have seen a number of nannies advertise for this type of situation who are open to hosting, in which case their home gets the wear and tear.

But then you lose the convenience of having a care giver come to your home. You have to pack up your kid (and his snacks, diapers, change of clothes, etc etc) every single morning and get him out of the house, just like you would with daycare (much cheaper) or a true share (in which pay would likely be slightly less AND there is no maternal instinct factor). At this point, isn't this scenario just the equivalent of someone running an illegal/unmonitored daycare out of her home?

1. I know parents who don't feeling hosting is such a convenience,
and would prefer to take their child elsewhere.

2. Share care costs are often equal,
considering the pros and cons for *each* family.

3. The best nannies often have some maternal instinct factor.

1. Completely ridiculous. The most expensive form of childcare is a nanny because it is convenient for families to have their child cared for in their own home. Also, at their own home, the nanny can help with cleaning, dishes, laundry, etc. The nanny cannot do that if she is not at their home. This is on top of the other issues mentioned above (the inconvenience of having to transport child and all his things daily).

2. Yes, in a true share the costs are equal, but in the scenario of nanny bringing her own child it is not a true share.

3. So...your argument is that nannies will have maternal feelings towards their charge? Well, that sot of makes sense on some level, but NOT IF THE NANNIES OWN CHILD IS PRESENT. If her own child is there her true maternal instinct will ALWAYS BE 100% skewed in favor of her own offspring. This is scientific fact.

Clearly, you are one of those "nannies" who brings her child with her to work (or perhaps, a nanny who si pregnant and planning to do this?). I've seen this with my own eyes too many times. "Nannies" who bring their own child always favor him/her to the detriment of their charge. Even if they don't fully realize they are doing it, they are.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi,

Our nanny wants to bring her 11 month to work on a full-time schedule. She will take care of our infant. I am wondering how much to pay her.
Thanks for advice,

Don't do it, OP. Your poor baby will always be second best to the nanny. Her own child, so close in age to yours, will be the nanny's priority. Please, for your baby's sake, get a nanny who will give your infant the nurturing and attention she deserves -- or at the very least have your baby in a share with another baby NOT related to the nanny.

+1000

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I brought my child, my NF never asked me for a discount rate. They said in my reference letter that they could not have found better care for their baby.

Both parents were physicians. I provided care for two years, when they moved to Europe.

Of course they could have; you without your child would have been better. You with your child is second best compared to you without the child.

Not in their opinion. See how narrow minded you are? Not all intelligent parents think that being the only child is a plus.

Yes, pretty much all intelligent parents think their child would be better off cared for by a woman whose first priority is her own child. This is not a only child vs. child with sibling situation. This is a situation of having a woman always put your child second to her own. A terrible situation for the poor little thing.

You haven't clue which child I put first.
Again, not everyone is as selfish as you sound.
Get a grip.

*a clue

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I brought my child, my NF never asked me for a discount rate. They said in my reference letter that they could not have found better care for their baby.

Both parents were physicians. I provided care for two years, when they moved to Europe.

Of course they could have; you without your child would have been better. You with your child is second best compared to you without the child.

Not in their opinion. See how narrow minded you are? Not all intelligent parents think that being the only child is a plus.

Yes, pretty much all intelligent parents think their child would be better off cared for by a woman whose first priority is her own child. This is not a only child vs. child with sibling situation. This is a situation of having a woman always put your child second to her own. A terrible situation for the poor little thing.

You haven't clue which child I put first.
Again, not everyone is as selfish as you sound.
Get a grip.

Anonymous wrote:Hi,

Our nanny wants to bring her 11 month to work on a full-time schedule. She will take care of our infant. I am wondering how much to pay her.
Thanks for advice,

Don't do it, OP. Your poor baby will always be second best to the nanny. Her own child, so close in age to yours, will be the nanny's priority. Please, for your baby's sake, get a nanny who will give your infant the nurturing and attention she deserves -- or at the very least have your baby in a share with another baby NOT related to the nanny.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I brought my child, my NF never asked me for a discount rate. They said in my reference letter that they could not have found better care for their baby.

Both parents were physicians. I provided care for two years, when they moved to Europe.

Of course they could have; you without your child would have been better. You with your child is second best compared to you without the child.

Not in their opinion. See how narrow minded you are? Not all intelligent parents think that being the only child is a plus.

Yes, pretty much all intelligent parents think their child would be better off cared for by a woman whose first priority is her own child. This is not a only child vs. child with sibling situation. This is a situation of having a woman always put your child second to her own. A terrible situation for the poor little thing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I brought my child, my NF never asked me for a discount rate. They said in my reference letter that they could not have found better care for their baby.

Both parents were physicians. I provided care for two years, when they moved to Europe.

Of course they could have; you without your child would have been better. You with your child is second best compared to you without the child.

Not in their opinion. See how narrow minded you are? Not all intelligent parents think that being the only child is a plus.

Anonymous wrote:When I brought my child, my NF never asked me for a discount rate. They said in my reference letter that they could not have found better care for their baby.

Both parents were physicians. I provided care for two years, when they moved to Europe.

Of course they could have; you without your child would have been better. You with your child is second best compared to you without the child.

Anonymous wrote:When I brought my child, my NF never asked me for a discount rate. They said in my reference letter that they could not have found better care for their baby.

Both parents were physicians. I provided care for two years, when they moved to Europe.

You are the rare unicorn in nanny world. Likely the parents were busy and checked out and hired the first good candidate they came across.

When I brought my child, my NF never asked me for a discount rate. They said in my reference letter that they could not have found better care for their baby.

Both parents were physicians. I provided care for two years, when they moved to Europe.

Pay as if you were in a share - 50% of a normal hourly wage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have seen a number of nannies advertise for this type of situation who are open to hosting, in which case their home gets the wear and tear.

But then you lose the convenience of having a care giver come to your home. You have to pack up your kid (and his snacks, diapers, change of clothes, etc etc) every single morning and get him out of the house, just like you would with daycare (much cheaper) or a true share (in which pay would likely be slightly less AND there is no maternal instinct factor). At this point, isn't this scenario just the equivalent of someone running an illegal/unmonitored daycare out of her home?

1. I know parents who don't feeling hosting is such a convenience,
and would prefer to take their child elsewhere.

2. Share care costs are often equal,
considering the pros and cons for *each* family.

3. The best nannies often have some maternal instinct factor.

Anonymous wrote:I have seen a number of nannies advertise for this type of situation who are open to hosting, in which case their home gets the wear and tear.

But then you lose the convenience of having a care giver come to your home. You have to pack up your kid (and his snacks, diapers, change of clothes, etc etc) every single morning and get him out of the house, just like you would with daycare (much cheaper) or a true share (in which pay would likely be slightly less AND there is no maternal instinct factor). At this point, isn't this scenario just the equivalent of someone running an illegal/unmonitored daycare out of her home?

I have seen a number of nannies advertise for this type of situation who are open to hosting, in which case their home gets the wear and tear.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Be prepared to budget 50% over what you are paying. As the kids grow into toddler be ready to spend extra for food, inevitable things that are going to break, activities for both kids and so on.

These are the things you need to discuss. I would end up feeling like I needed to pay for the nanny's kid to go to Music Together, Gymboree, etc., so that my kid could go.

Excellent points, which are often issues in nanny shares. Plus food and snack, formula or milk sharing that inevitably happens. Plus more wear and tear on the house.