Your nanny sounds selfish. I'm a nanny, and I would be satisfied with a $1/hr raise every year (that is granted you didn't have another baby that past year, in that case I would expect more).

A dollar raise each year is unnecessary.

Anonymous wrote:Cost of living is now around 3.9% + a 3 to 5% merit increase. We usually give an annual raise of around 8 or 9% (we have a great nanny who always merits the highest merit increase). Longevity and loyalty of an employee, especially an employee as important to the family as a nanny, needs to be acknowledged. We have had the same nanny for four years. Her job change as our daughter gets older but it is no less work for the nanny (I actually think the driving back and forth to school and lessons in this traffic is harder than when DD was a baby).

Um. No. The 2014 COL adjustment for SSI was 1.7%. Not sure where you get 3.9%.

Anonymous wrote:Time for an au pair.

Right because you can treat them like indentured serva,ts and the State Dept. Makes it legal.

Just because you took a lower paying job for your convenience does not mean your nanny doesn't get a decent raise.

Nannies always ask for more.
When we had one child and did the annual $1ph raise, plus paid her 6th&7th week off, and paid a one weeks salary bonus, all she did was complain about her taxes, car payments and driving a toddler two miles one-way. Then she asked for a $2ph raise.

We told her again this is the job spec and rate, let us know tomorrow if you want to keep the job.

we went to bonuses twice a year and left the rate as is after 4 years of raises.
$0.50/ hour raises can happen too if things are getting priced out.

OP here. 16:50-- you got it exactly. We pay $20 an hour, plus taxes. We average 15-20 hours per week. Our set up is that we have a set schedule of 20 hours. If we need more hours that week and the nanny can do it, great (and she usually can cover almost anytime between 7 am and 6 pm, which is awesome and will be hard to find in anyone else). (If she can't, we have family and babysitters who can cover.) If we need fewer than 20 hours, we give her the option-- work the 20 hours (and I'll use the extra time to take one kid to do something alone, or run errands, or clean the house) or work fewer hours and get paid for fewer hours. We always round up and we don't count every minute. (For example, if I get home an hour early, I tell her to go home and pay her for the hour. If I have a quiet week and am done at noon instead of 4, I give her the option to stay and get paid or go home and not get paid. She almost always goes home.) She doesn't like to work evenings or weekends (which I understand). But, as a result, we almost never go out or even both go to back to school night or things because we don't want to pay even more for a sitter. An au pair would give us the flexibility to do that sometimes. (Not often, but it probably comes up 6-8 times a year where we would like to both attend something or go out to dinner.)

My fear is that we will never find someone who wants to work this kind of schedule again. I am a firm believer in paying the person caring for my children a fair amount. But, what I also need is someone who can generally work the same 20 hours each week with flexibility to change or add to those hours as needed (knowing I'll give other hours off if I don't need them). I can't see finding that in a nanny without paying for full time, which I think would be really expensive (especially with pre-school tuition and overtime to cover the occasional 7 am start or 6 pm end times). While I would never use 45 hours a week with an au pair, it would be nice to have the option to have some 30 or 35 hour weeks without it costing a lot more money that month!

I know an au pair is not for everyone but, as I said, we had several au pairs when I was growing up. We are still close to many of them. Our plan has always been to switch to an au pair when our kids are all in school full time since we will always need that flexibility of before/after school hours and covering days off, kids mildly sick, etc. So, while we know there are certainly cons to having an au pair, it has always been part of our plan. We just hadn't been thinking of going to that yet but, if our nanny decides to move on, it may make sense to go ahead and try that.

Thanks to everyone who gave feedback. It makes me feel better to know that we are not unreasonable to think that $1 a year is pretty fair.

Anonymous wrote:

PP is accurate and so are you there are many reasons a family may choose an au pair over a nanny and op family needs may be best met with an au pair now, but that doesn't change that 4 years of raises and the nanny is just now above an au pair wages nanny started off very low. Op hinted at that and has conveniently not disclosed what nanny makes.

Actually, OP mentioned that she needs flexible hours from week to week, and that on average nanny works 15-20 hours per week. Assume even 20 hours per week, then assume $20/hr rate that no one will argue is low. With the employment taxes you get about $23K per year for nanny cost. Au pair program with all the fees loaded is also about $23k/ year give or take. So the equivalent in cost is at a pretty reasonable nanny rate given OP situation. OP just doesn't need full time child care and worries that she won't be able to find another nanny with the flexibility to work the hours OP needs. I concur that it will be harder to find a replacement in this case vs a full time nanny.

Oh, OP, please thing through the Au Pair route. We tried it and it was horrible! It's such a crap shoot as you never know if the personality of the girl is going to mesh with your household. A foreign girl, sometimes away from home for the first time, living with you 24/7 is an adjustment even if you get along perfectly.

Our Au Pair stayed out all night partying - she was like an animal let out of her cage for the first time. I felt like I had to parent the au pair constantly. She never bonded with my daughter and was a slob.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our nanny has been with us for about 4 1/2 years. After the first few months, we gave her a $1 an hour raid and then have gone up by $1 a year since then. She brought up that she would like a bigger raise this year. My pay actually went down this year (switched to a job with better work-life balance, but took a pay cut to do it), and DH's net pay went down since our cost for health insurance went way up. We adore our nanny and think she does a great job caring for our kids, but we just can't afford more than $1 this year. She is part time (her choice and it works ok for us), and we give benefits (paid sick days, paid holidays if they fall on her normal work days, paid vacation time) and a lot of flexibility both in terms of the schedule and letting her take care of personal matters or things for her family while she has our kids. We don't ask her to do anything other than care for the kids (i.e., she doesn't clean up their toys, do their laundry, cook for them other than making a PBJ or something for lunch). I'm concerned that we are pricing ourselves out of keeping her since, at this point, we could get an au pair for more hours per week and less money (and our kids are old enough now that it would be a good option).

What do other people do for raises? Is it always every year? How much do you give? Have you parted ways with a great nanny because she got too expensive over time?

If you are just now after 4 years of raises reaching the point where an au pair is cheaper then you must pay an abysmally low amount... Au pairs earn like $3 an hour.

An au pair solution to childcare is very different than a nanny solution. Rate is only one piece of the equation and having someone live with you full time is a pretty significant decision. Don't make such rude assumptions about the OP simply because she hasn't chosen an au pair option previously.

PP is accurate and so are you there are many reasons a family may choose an au pair over a nanny and op family needs may be best met with an au pair now, but that doesn't change that 4 years of raises and the nanny is just now above an au pair wages nanny started off very low. Op hinted at that and has conveniently not disclosed what nanny makes.