Anonymous
10/21/2014 15:49
Subject: Do I keep or fire my nanny?
OP said the nanny's mom had a heart atrack when she came into work and then nanny asked to leave. I know reliability is major with a job but this nanny did the right thing. I don't care what job I have, I will go to the hospital if one of my parents had a heart attack. She did the right thing. Imagine if the nanny ( or you) didn't go to the hospital while your parent had a heart attack bcuz you didn't want to take off work so early in on a job. What if said parent died from that heart attack? Surely you would regret it. I'm sorry but no job is worth me not being there for my parents in a situation like that. Jobs come and go but you only have one mother. I'd rather lose the job than lose a parent and not even be there to say goodbye. Millions die from heart attacks yearly. It's not like her nanny decided to see a cousin with the flu. Her mom had a heart attack and she was justified in leaving.
Anonymous
10/21/2014 15:45
Subject: Do I keep or fire my nanny?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For a three-month position, I don't think it's worth firing her. However, she's probably not taking the job as seriously as she would a long term position either. Would you worry as much about upsetting your temporary employers? The day at the hospital with mom in the first couple of weeks might not happen if you were trying to prove your reputation for the long haul, but if you're only there three months anyway, mom wins by a mile.
How do you know she isn't taking this job seriously? Regardless if the position was temp of long-term, most of us can agree that if a parent had a heart attack, they would go be with them in the hospital. It has nothing to do with proving a reputation. You sound very ignorant to even make that statement.
No, I am a grown-up who has had jobs. Especially for a new job I actually gave a shit about, I would stay with mom before work and after work, call in to check on her during the day, maybe try to work with my employers taking part days or shifting hours so I could be with mom more. For a job I was less committed to, I'd be maximizing mom time and not worrying too much about the job.
How do you know how you'd react? How do you know that the nanny's mother isn't in serious condition?
Even "grown ups" need to be with family in situations like that. It has nothing to do with how seriously she takes her job.
You lack tact.
Who do I need to be tactful for? That nanny isn't part of this conversation. And she came to work that day to begin with.
Anyway, perhaps I have a different perspective because I moved far away from home at 18 and never went back there to live, so I found other ways to be at the side of close family members in need. People have to work in all kinds of emotionally-difficult situations. When you are proving yourself at a new job, you err on the side of showing up for work. Or you don't, but you can't expect a boss who barely knows you to have the empathy of one you've worked for over the long haul.
I feel like we have this conversation on this forum over and over and over again. There are no jobs that say "take all the time you need" a couple of weeks after you start, and don't put you on probation, even if it's "double secret" probation that you don't know about because a nice person would never say you had to stay at work. But, if your grandma has a heart attack next week, and now you have a funeral to attend, you may have used up your new employer sympathy.
I feel extremely sad for you.
Anonymous
10/21/2014 15:41
Subject: Do I keep or fire my nanny?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For a three-month position, I don't think it's worth firing her. However, she's probably not taking the job as seriously as she would a long term position either. Would you worry as much about upsetting your temporary employers? The day at the hospital with mom in the first couple of weeks might not happen if you were trying to prove your reputation for the long haul, but if you're only there three months anyway, mom wins by a mile.
How do you know she isn't taking this job seriously? Regardless if the position was temp of long-term, most of us can agree that if a parent had a heart attack, they would go be with them in the hospital. It has nothing to do with proving a reputation. You sound very ignorant to even make that statement.
No, I am a grown-up who has had jobs. Especially for a new job I actually gave a shit about, I would stay with mom before work and after work, call in to check on her during the day, maybe try to work with my employers taking part days or shifting hours so I could be with mom more. For a job I was less committed to, I'd be maximizing mom time and not worrying too much about the job.
How do you know how you'd react? How do you know that the nanny's mother isn't in serious condition?
Even "grown ups" need to be with family in situations like that. It has nothing to do with how seriously she takes her job.
You lack tact.
Who do I need to be tactful for? That nanny isn't part of this conversation. And she came to work that day to begin with.
Anyway, perhaps I have a different perspective because I moved far away from home at 18 and never went back there to live, so I found other ways to be at the side of close family members in need. People have to work in all kinds of emotionally-difficult situations. When you are proving yourself at a new job, you err on the side of showing up for work. Or you don't, but you can't expect a boss who barely knows you to have the empathy of one you've worked for over the long haul.
I feel like we have this conversation on this forum over and over and over again. There are no jobs that say "take all the time you need" a couple of weeks after you start, and don't put you on probation, even if it's "double secret" probation that you don't know about because a nice person would never say you had to stay at work. But, if your grandma has a heart attack next week, and now you have a funeral to attend, you may have used up your new employer sympathy.
Anonymous
10/21/2014 12:20
Subject: Do I keep or fire my nanny?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For a three-month position, I don't think it's worth firing her. However, she's probably not taking the job as seriously as she would a long term position either. Would you worry as much about upsetting your temporary employers? The day at the hospital with mom in the first couple of weeks might not happen if you were trying to prove your reputation for the long haul, but if you're only there three months anyway, mom wins by a mile.
How do you know she isn't taking this job seriously? Regardless if the position was temp of long-term, most of us can agree that if a parent had a heart attack, they would go be with them in the hospital. It has nothing to do with proving a reputation. You sound very ignorant to even make that statement.
No, I am a grown-up who has had jobs. Especially for a new job I actually gave a shit about, I would stay with mom before work and after work, call in to check on her during the day, maybe try to work with my employers taking part days or shifting hours so I could be with mom more. For a job I was less committed to, I'd be maximizing mom time and not worrying too much about the job.
How do you know how you'd react? How do you know that the nanny's mother isn't in serious condition?
Even "grown ups" need to be with family in situations like that. It has nothing to do with how seriously she takes her job.
You lack tact.
Anonymous
10/21/2014 12:12
Subject: Do I keep or fire my nanny?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:For a three-month position, I don't think it's worth firing her. However, she's probably not taking the job as seriously as she would a long term position either. Would you worry as much about upsetting your temporary employers? The day at the hospital with mom in the first couple of weeks might not happen if you were trying to prove your reputation for the long haul, but if you're only there three months anyway, mom wins by a mile.
How do you know she isn't taking this job seriously? Regardless if the position was temp of long-term, most of us can agree that if a parent had a heart attack, they would go be with them in the hospital. It has nothing to do with proving a reputation. You sound very ignorant to even make that statement.
No, I am a grown-up who has had jobs. Especially for a new job I actually gave a shit about, I would stay with mom before work and after work, call in to check on her during the day, maybe try to work with my employers taking part days or shifting hours so I could be with mom more. For a job I was less committed to, I'd be maximizing mom time and not worrying too much about the job.
Anonymous
10/21/2014 08:11
Subject: Do I keep or fire my nanny?
Anonymous wrote:For a three-month position, I don't think it's worth firing her. However, she's probably not taking the job as seriously as she would a long term position either. Would you worry as much about upsetting your temporary employers? The day at the hospital with mom in the first couple of weeks might not happen if you were trying to prove your reputation for the long haul, but if you're only there three months anyway, mom wins by a mile.
How do you know she isn't taking this job seriously? Regardless if the position was temp of long-term, most of us can agree that if a parent had a heart attack, they would go be with them in the hospital. It has nothing to do with proving a reputation. You sound very ignorant to even make that statement.
Anonymous
10/21/2014 02:21
Subject: Do I keep or fire my nanny?
OP why would you even consider firing this woman? You even admitted that you made her ill for the first time she called in sick so that is your own fault. The second time is just a bad thing that happened to her mom, such is life.
Sure, timing isn't too good, but sh*# happens and no one ever plans bad timing.
She is obviously not getting paid for her days off so I am sure that she is suffering losses on her end.
I say keep her and have some more compassion and empathy towards the person who has some for your child.
Sure, timing isn't too good, but sh*# happens and no one ever plans bad timing.
She is obviously not getting paid for her days off so I am sure that she is suffering losses on her end.
I say keep her and have some more compassion and empathy towards the person who has some for your child.
Anonymous
10/21/2014 01:16
Subject: Do I keep or fire my nanny?
Anonymous wrote:I know a great nanny we just used for are newborn who is available now if you want her info? She is great and very reliable.
I hope you're not homeschooling.
Anonymous
10/21/2014 00:49
Subject: Do I keep or fire my nanny?
Anonymous wrote:I guess we can keep her. I worry about get taking days off and me missing work.
Then be decent and do not have her come when you are sick and scrub the house down. You are complaining you made her sick.