Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It boils down to this: if a sitter cancels on me for a non-good reason for an event I made clear to her was a big deal I would not call her again. If I cancel on a sitter without payment she is free to let me nobs that she requires payment since she held the date or she is free to decide not to sit for me again. If I had a sitter I loved I would pay the cancellation fee. If she was just occasional and I did not care about switching to someone new then I would likely be fine with her decision to avoid doing business again with me.

And I wouldn't give you a reason. Its not up to you to decide what is or is not a good enough pull on MY time. Your rate, how you treat me, and how high maitenance you and your kids are would likely determine what is a good enough reason to cancel on. For a PITA family, it could be something as simple as its going to be 70 degrees and sunny. For others it would take more. You're going to say you'd never hire me (again), but what you don't realize is that it is really no loss to a sitter. You on the other hand will find it more and more difficult to find and keep a sitter. That very well may be why OP is in this predicament. Of all of her sitters, only one would take the job, and then even she bailed. Now OP is panicked over having 2 weeks to find a sitter, because she obviously has issues finding and keeping them.

I agree. If PP couldn't talk a sitter into taking her job 6 weeks out....there's a reason.
Babysitting jobs with people like you are a dime a dozen. I choose to babysit for families who treat me with dignity and respect.
You're going to decide whether my reason is valid...funny.

Anonymous wrote:It boils down to this: if a sitter cancels on me for a non-good reason for an event I made clear to her was a big deal I would not call her again. If I cancel on a sitter without payment she is free to let me nobs that she requires payment since she held the date or she is free to decide not to sit for me again. If I had a sitter I loved I would pay the cancellation fee. If she was just occasional and I did not care about switching to someone new then I would likely be fine with her decision to avoid doing business again with me.

And I wouldn't give you a reason. Its not up to you to decide what is or is not a good enough pull on MY time. Your rate, how you treat me, and how high maitenance you and your kids are would likely determine what is a good enough reason to cancel on. For a PITA family, it could be something as simple as its going to be 70 degrees and sunny. For others it would take more. You're going to say you'd never hire me (again), but what you don't realize is that it is really no loss to a sitter. You on the other hand will find it more and more difficult to find and keep a sitter. That very well may be why OP is in this predicament. Of all of her sitters, only one would take the job, and then even she bailed. Now OP is panicked over having 2 weeks to find a sitter, because she obviously has issues finding and keeping them.

YABU.

Two weeks is considerate and plenty of time to find a sitter. Use an agency if you're in a pinch/have exhausted your own list and those of friends and failed to find someone.

It boils down to this: if a sitter cancels on me for a non-good reason for an event I made clear to her was a big deal I would not call her again. If I cancel on a sitter without payment she is free to let me nobs that she requires payment since she held the date or she is free to decide not to sit for me again. If I had a sitter I loved I would pay the cancellation fee. If she was just occasional and I did not care about switching to someone new then I would likely be fine with her decision to avoid doing business again with me.

Anonymous wrote:OP here: This event was never going to get canceled. It is our annual meeting. Does anyone have a suggestion on how to book a sitter for something very important and set-in-stone with good advance notice? I need reliability and I made it quite clear to this sitter that this was very important to me. I also would feel foolish scrambling to look for a sitter for such an important event with only 1 or 2 weeks notice.

I can't recall the last time I canceled on a sitter.

Use an agency - they will guarantee someone being available if you book that far in advance.

But life happens - even in the most seemingly ironclad situations. Having two weeks to find a solution is extremely different than having 2 hours.

Anonymous wrote:OP here: This event was never going to get canceled. It is our annual meeting. Does anyone have a suggestion on how to book a sitter for something very important and set-in-stone with good advance notice? I need reliability and I made it quite clear to this sitter that this was very important to me. I also would feel foolish scrambling to look for a sitter for such an important event with only 1 or 2 weeks notice.

I can't recall the last time I canceled on a sitter.

OP most sitters aren't going to cancel on you. This sitter probably doesn't cancel regularly. Just find another sitter. 1-2 weeks notice is the normal window for booking a sitter, 6 weeks was way too early as you now know. People have lives, and your work thing is only important to you. To your sitter this is just a babysitting job, and nothing more. Good luck.

Anonymous wrote:Ok I will take a stab at answering why canceling on a sitter is not as big a deal as her backing out of a gig. Because with the cancellation the MB may now not be able to do the work event she already had scheduled. Nanny is not in the same spot - she now has free time she did not before. She can rebook with another family or go out with friends instead. I realize that a cancellation may be a problem for a nanny that relies on sitting to pay her bills but personally I do not like to use that sort of sitter for date nights. I much prefer a college kid just looking for spending money.

That said nanny has every right to decide not to sit anymore for a family that does not pay her for a scheduled babysitting session just as OP's only recourse is not to use this nanny again since she is clearly not reliable.

This is the most ridiculous thing I've read today.

Anonymous wrote:OP here: This event was never going to get canceled. It is our annual meeting. Does anyone have a suggestion on how to book a sitter for something very important and set-in-stone with good advance notice? I need reliability and I made it quite clear to this sitter that this was very important to me. I also would feel foolish scrambling to look for a sitter for such an important event with only 1 or 2 weeks notice.

I can't recall the last time I canceled on a sitter.

Short of enslaving a babysitter and keeping her locked in your basement, there is no way to set a babysitting date in stone.
There are no guarantees in life....this includes babysitters.
Find a larger group of backup sitters.

OP here: This event was never going to get canceled. It is our annual meeting. Does anyone have a suggestion on how to book a sitter for something very important and set-in-stone with good advance notice? I need reliability and I made it quite clear to this sitter that this was very important to me. I also would feel foolish scrambling to look for a sitter for such an important event with only 1 or 2 weeks notice.

I can't recall the last time I canceled on a sitter.

Anonymous wrote:Ok I will take a stab at answering why canceling on a sitter is not as big a deal as her backing out of a gig. Because with the cancellation the MB may now not be able to do the work event she already had scheduled. Nanny is not in the same spot - she now has free time she did not before. She can rebook with another family or go out with friends instead. I realize that a cancellation may be a problem for a nanny that relies on sitting to pay her bills but personally I do not like to use that sort of sitter for date nights. I much prefer a college kid just looking for spending money.

That said nanny has every right to decide not to sit anymore for a family that does not pay her for a scheduled babysitting session just as OP's only recourse is not to use this nanny again since she is clearly not reliable.

Yeah that was a decent try at rationalizing this, but it falls short. Just as it doesn't matter why an MB hires a sitter (for work, for date night, or so she can stare at the wall), it should not matter why a sitter takes a gig. They deserve the same level of commitment, independent of the reason. That being said, an ad hoc sitting gig tends to be very casual in nature for both sides and I think that there is only a certain level of commitment that you can expect for a job like this. As a sitter, I would expect payment for a canceled gig within 24 hours, and would not give a second thought to a cancelation two weeks in advanced. If I accept a sitting gig 6 weeks out, I would probably make it a tentative acceptance anyway. That is simply too far out to know what I will be doing, and sitting is what I do when I have nothing else to do. If a family made a stink over 2 weeks notice for a sitting gig cancelation I would think them high maitenance and dramatic, so it would be a mutual parting.

Ok I will take a stab at answering why canceling on a sitter is not as big a deal as her backing out of a gig. Because with the cancellation the MB may now not be able to do the work event she already had scheduled. Nanny is not in the same spot - she now has free time she did not before. She can rebook with another family or go out with friends instead. I realize that a cancellation may be a problem for a nanny that relies on sitting to pay her bills but personally I do not like to use that sort of sitter for date nights. I much prefer a college kid just looking for spending money.

That said nanny has every right to decide not to sit anymore for a family that does not pay her for a scheduled babysitting session just as OP's only recourse is not to use this nanny again since she is clearly not reliable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have TWO WEEKS to find another sitter!!! Seriously, what are you belly-aching about? If your event had been cancelled two weeks ahead of time, would you have paid the nanny? I think we all know the answer to that is a big "NO".

Good question, OP. If your event had been cancelled two weeks prior would you have paid the nanny who held the date open for you?

This is actually a really good point. I have seen countless posts on DCUM from MBs who think it is just fine to cancel on a babysitter with wayyyyyy less than 2 weeks notice. Why is it a tragedy of a sitter cancels, yet perfectly acceptable if you do?

It's not a good point because it doesn't answer OP's question. If you want to complain about MB/DB's who cancel start a new thread. Don't hijack this one.

Nonsense. That is a perfectly valid question. Quid Pro Quo. And very applicable to this MB's situation.

I notice none of them are jumping to answer it, as well. Always a different set of rules, and you wonder why we can't have a meaningful conversation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have TWO WEEKS to find another sitter!!! Seriously, what are you belly-aching about? If your event had been cancelled two weeks ahead of time, would you have paid the nanny? I think we all know the answer to that is a big "NO".

Good question, OP. If your event had been cancelled two weeks prior would you have paid the nanny who held the date open for you?

This is actually a really good point. I have seen countless posts on DCUM from MBs who think it is just fine to cancel on a babysitter with wayyyyyy less than 2 weeks notice. Why is it a tragedy of a sitter cancels, yet perfectly acceptable if you do?

It's not a good point because it doesn't answer OP's question. If you want to complain about MB/DB's who cancel start a new thread. Don't hijack this one.

Nonsense. That is a perfectly valid question. Quid Pro Quo. And very applicable to this MB's situation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have TWO WEEKS to find another sitter!!! Seriously, what are you belly-aching about? If your event had been cancelled two weeks ahead of time, would you have paid the nanny? I think we all know the answer to that is a big "NO".

Good question, OP. If your event had been cancelled two weeks prior would you have paid the nanny who held the date open for you?

This is actually a really good point. I have seen countless posts on DCUM from MBs who think it is just fine to cancel on a babysitter with wayyyyyy less than 2 weeks notice. Why is it a tragedy of a sitter cancels, yet perfectly acceptable if you do?

It's not a good point because it doesn't answer OP's question. If you want to complain about MB/DB's who cancel start a new thread. Don't hijack this one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have TWO WEEKS to find another sitter!!! Seriously, what are you belly-aching about? If your event had been cancelled two weeks ahead of time, would you have paid the nanny? I think we all know the answer to that is a big "NO".

Good question, OP. If your event had been cancelled two weeks prior would you have paid the nanny who held the date open for you?

This is actually a really good point. I have seen countless posts on DCUM from MBs who think it is just fine to cancel on a babysitter with wayyyyyy less than 2 weeks notice. Why is it a tragedy of a sitter cancels, yet perfectly acceptable if you do?