Anonymous wrote:We hired a nanny in August of this year. She has had several issues with reliabilty (relating to sick time/snow days - she will not drive if there is a threat of snow even if it is not currently snowing). She has been out of work for 13 days since her start date. She does have PTO, but only 3 out of 13 were scheduled. Both my husband and I have jobs that rarely close with the weather and we cannot work from home easily.

She got into a fender bender with my kids in the car a month ago - insurance company ruled her fault. This is not something I would hold against her and did not require that she pay any part of the deductible - but it does add together with all the other things.

Additionally, while she is great with our baby, I am afraid that she is not at all connecting with my preschooler. The preschooler is in 3 half days of preschool currently, but will spend the upcoming summer with the nanny and then start school in the fall.

We have started using a back up nanny for the time that she is out (and paying BOTH of them for the day). She is great with the preschooler and okay with the baby from what I can tell. The backup nanny has expressed an interest in coming on full time with us as she is currently in school at night and working several part time jobs. We like her, but she is younger than I would have chosen for the baby and we have really tried to be fair with our current nanny in case her issues have really been a string of bad luck.

At what point do we give up and make a change? How much do we cater to what I think is best for the baby vs what is best for the preschooler? We also have a school aged child who is rarely ever there but when he is the backup nanny is better for him as well.

i would fire the nanny. over time, she will only become more lazy and entitled. i wish I could just not work all the time and get paid for it. jesus. I went 10 years without even a 4 day weekend and these entitled people think the world owes them a day or 2 or more off every week OMG dont get me started.

PP, this is very helpful. OP, you would get charged for her unemployment. You would get charged more precisely because she was not working for you for very long: since August is already five or six months depending on when she started.

Most employers don't care about unemployment. Technically its fraud to fire someone for cause and then say not cause on the unemployment claim. Both the nanny and the employer are screwing the government and being fraudulent in this case. However, many employers don't care and nannies, especially the screw ups that get fired, always think they are entitled to anything. Also some states do allow unemployments for individuals fired for cause.

If you do care about unemployment then make sure to send the nanny a termination letter listing that she was fired for cause and the reasons. You need to set aside the touchy feel stuff and use direct terminology. If she didn't follow directions it is insubordination not we just didn't hit it off after a year. If she was late, she failed to report to work at the agreed upon time. If she goofs off and doesn't do her job, it is she failed to perform job duties and created an unsafe environment by failing to supervise the child while she was distracted on the phone. If she was texting in the car..she was violating state driving laws while transporting your child and operating your vehicle. You get the idea. You also should not give her severance or positive references. A simple "I would not rehire this person again" suffices and no need to get into it with others.

If you give her severance, positive references and a touchy feel we wish you the best letter then I guarantee you that the unemployment agency will grant her unemployment because everything you documented hid the real cause reasons why you fired her. Unemployment agencies are not looking for criminal court proof on anything. You don't need PI photographs of her texting on her phone at the park. The agencies do look at patterns of behavior. If everything that you did was around pretending she wasn't fired for cause because you wanted to seem nice or whatever, they won't believe you when you tell a different story on the claim.

OP here - to clarify 6:46 isn't me. I was not planning on fighting unemployment. I don't think I am the employer that will be charged as she worked for us for such a small amount of time though.

Anonymous wrote:Just a note: I recently fired a nanny in VA. In my mind it was for cause: she was texting way too much while with the kids, stopped following directions and told me that she was trying to get new job elsewhere. I did not do a good job documenting all the warnings and conversations with her on how we dont like her work. I did pay her 2 weeks severance. Anyway, she filed for unemployment benefits the same day and the unemployment office cited with her. Now my unemployment tax rate for new nanny is much higher, so I'll be paying $500/year extra in unemployment taxes as long as I continue having nannies. So, if you are firing for cause you might want to make sure there is a written trail and that is clear to the nanny what she did wrong/not per contract.

written trail does not necessary mean that the nanny will not be able to claim unemployment.
Unscheduled PTO days and 'does not connect with older' but is great with baby are not really reasons to deny unemployment.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh shut up! You prattle on like a crazy person on every freakin thread. I don't even think you're a troll. I think you really are just that crazy.

Didn't your parents teach you the art of ignoring whoever you don't like? Or is it just another bad day for you? As long as you feel better, you don't have to shut up. Carry on.

Crazy comma nanny, didn't YOUR parents teach you to ignore those you don't like? Clearly not, because each time you disagree with parent-posters you accuse them of not valuing their children. You clearly have an abusive personality. Did you learn that from your parents or your nanny?

Actually, she used one comma and it was in the right place. You used TWO commas. Now who is the crazy comma lady?

Did you even go to school?

Not the PP but stop sticking up for yourself, sockpuppet. You sound like a loon in all your comments.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh shut up! You prattle on like a crazy person on every freakin thread. I don't even think you're a troll. I think you really are just that crazy.

Didn't your parents teach you the art of ignoring whoever you don't like? Or is it just another bad day for you? As long as you feel better, you don't have to shut up. Carry on.

Crazy comma nanny, didn't YOUR parents teach you to ignore those you don't like? Clearly not, because each time you disagree with parent-posters you accuse them of not valuing their children. You clearly have an abusive personality. Did you learn that from your parents or your nanny?

Actually, she used one comma and it was in the right place. You used TWO commas. Now who is the crazy comma lady?

Did you even go to school?

Just a note: I recently fired a nanny in VA. In my mind it was for cause: she was texting way too much while with the kids, stopped following directions and told me that she was trying to get new job elsewhere. I did not do a good job documenting all the warnings and conversations with her on how we dont like her work. I did pay her 2 weeks severance. Anyway, she filed for unemployment benefits the same day and the unemployment office cited with her. Now my unemployment tax rate for new nanny is much higher, so I'll be paying $500/year extra in unemployment taxes as long as I continue having nannies. So, if you are firing for cause you might want to make sure there is a written trail and that is clear to the nanny what she did wrong/not per contract.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh shut up! You prattle on like a crazy person on every freakin thread. I don't even think you're a troll. I think you really are just that crazy.

Didn't your parents teach you the art of ignoring whoever you don't like? Or is it just another bad day for you? As long as you feel better, you don't have to shut up. Carry on.

Crazy comma nanny, didn't YOUR parents teach you to ignore those you don't like? Clearly not, because each time you disagree with parent-posters you accuse them of not valuing their children. You clearly have an abusive personality. Did you learn that from your parents or your nanny?

Didn't you learn about using your comma?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh shut up! You prattle on like a crazy person on every freakin thread. I don't even think you're a troll. I think you really are just that crazy.

Didn't your parents teach you the art of ignoring whoever you don't like? Or is it just another bad day for you? As long as you feel better, you don't have to shut up. Carry on.

Crazy comma nanny, didn't YOUR parents teach you to ignore those you don't like? Clearly not, because each time you disagree with parent-posters you accuse them of not valuing their children. You clearly have an abusive personality. Did you learn that from your parents or your nanny?