Anonymous
07/11/2013 12:03
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I've never worked with a family who didn't politely invite me to help myself. If I'm out and about with the child I might get something interesting (yes, I'm a foodie) on a whim, but I don't really have time to go food shopping after (or before) my work hours. Getting enough sleep is much more important for the success of my job.
One job I had was 60 hours a week. Some of you seem to overlook how ridiculous it'd be if I had to grocery shop at night. That would be a definate deal breaker.
I truly think this is the hardest part for most employers to understand. I don't want you to provide me with snacks/food because I feel entitled to it, often there simply isn't enough time in my day to run to the store/bank/clean my house/cook dinner/take care of anything personal when I am at your home for 12 hours a day. Yes, most nannies can get to the market on the weekend, but if I am in a rush in the morning or forgot to grab lunch, it's nice to know that you won't mind me making myself a sandwich.
Yes I think this is the real issue, and how it should be presented. Most, not all, but most who work 60+ hours in a week or 12+ in a day are hiring someone to take care of household responsibilities (maybe a nanny or housekeeper?), but if the nanny is working 60+ hours for you, there really isn't time to get adequate sleep, keep house, and grocery shop during the week. Everyone has days where there is no food in the house, or no time to pack lunch. It will do so much good for your relationship with your nanny, far more than it hurts you to share your apples. Very few nannies have the expectation of adding their grocery needs to you shopping list or cooking full meals at your home daily. The few that do also probably live in $30/hour nanny rate land.
Disgruntled?
Not at all. I pack my lunch daily, but my employers are generous people and go out of their way to have things around that they know I like. Its not something I expect but appreciate how generous they are and do my best to treat them in kind.
Naturally PP, when generosity and thoughtfulness go both ways, all is well.
Anonymous
07/11/2013 11:30
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I've never worked with a family who didn't politely invite me to help myself. If I'm out and about with the child I might get something interesting (yes, I'm a foodie) on a whim, but I don't really have time to go food shopping after (or before) my work hours. Getting enough sleep is much more important for the success of my job.
One job I had was 60 hours a week. Some of you seem to overlook how ridiculous it'd be if I had to grocery shop at night. That would be a definate deal breaker.
I truly think this is the hardest part for most employers to understand. I don't want you to provide me with snacks/food because I feel entitled to it, often there simply isn't enough time in my day to run to the store/bank/clean my house/cook dinner/take care of anything personal when I am at your home for 12 hours a day. Yes, most nannies can get to the market on the weekend, but if I am in a rush in the morning or forgot to grab lunch, it's nice to know that you won't mind me making myself a sandwich.
Yes I think this is the real issue, and how it should be presented. Most, not all, but most who work 60+ hours in a week or 12+ in a day are hiring someone to take care of household responsibilities (maybe a nanny or housekeeper?), but if the nanny is working 60+ hours for you, there really isn't time to get adequate sleep, keep house, and grocery shop during the week. Everyone has days where there is no food in the house, or no time to pack lunch. It will do so much good for your relationship with your nanny, far more than it hurts you to share your apples. Very few nannies have the expectation of adding their grocery needs to you shopping list or cooking full meals at your home daily. The few that do also probably live in $30/hour nanny rate land.
Disgruntled?
Not at all. I pack my lunch daily, but my employers are generous people and go out of their way to have things around that they know I like. Its not something I expect but appreciate how generous they are and do my best to treat them in kind.
Anonymous
07/11/2013 11:22
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I've never worked with a family who didn't politely invite me to help myself. If I'm out and about with the child I might get something interesting (yes, I'm a foodie) on a whim, but I don't really have time to go food shopping after (or before) my work hours. Getting enough sleep is much more important for the success of my job.
One job I had was 60 hours a week. Some of you seem to overlook how ridiculous it'd be if I had to grocery shop at night. That would be a definate deal breaker.
I truly think this is the hardest part for most employers to understand. I don't want you to provide me with snacks/food because I feel entitled to it, often there simply isn't enough time in my day to run to the store/bank/clean my house/cook dinner/take care of anything personal when I am at your home for 12 hours a day. Yes, most nannies can get to the market on the weekend, but if I am in a rush in the morning or forgot to grab lunch, it's nice to know that you won't mind me making myself a sandwich.
Yes I think this is the real issue, and how it should be presented. Most, not all, but most who work 60+ hours in a week or 12+ in a day are hiring someone to take care of household responsibilities (maybe a nanny or housekeeper?), but if the nanny is working 60+ hours for you, there really isn't time to get adequate sleep, keep house, and grocery shop during the week. Everyone has days where there is no food in the house, or no time to pack lunch. It will do so much good for your relationship with your nanny, far more than it hurts you to share your apples. Very few nannies have the expectation of adding their grocery needs to you shopping list or cooking full meals at your home daily. The few that do also probably live in $30/hour nanny rate land.
Disgruntled?
Anonymous
07/11/2013 10:38
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I've never worked with a family who didn't politely invite me to help myself. If I'm out and about with the child I might get something interesting (yes, I'm a foodie) on a whim, but I don't really have time to go food shopping after (or before) my work hours. Getting enough sleep is much more important for the success of my job.
One job I had was 60 hours a week. Some of you seem to overlook how ridiculous it'd be if I had to grocery shop at night. That would be a definate deal breaker.
I truly think this is the hardest part for most employers to understand. I don't want you to provide me with snacks/food because I feel entitled to it, often there simply isn't enough time in my day to run to the store/bank/clean my house/cook dinner/take care of anything personal when I am at your home for 12 hours a day. Yes, most nannies can get to the market on the weekend, but if I am in a rush in the morning or forgot to grab lunch, it's nice to know that you won't mind me making myself a sandwich.
Yes I think this is the real issue, and how it should be presented. Most, not all, but most who work 60+ hours in a week or 12+ in a day are hiring someone to take care of household responsibilities (maybe a nanny or housekeeper?), but if the nanny is working 60+ hours for you, there really isn't time to get adequate sleep, keep house, and grocery shop during the week. Everyone has days where there is no food in the house, or no time to pack lunch. It will do so much good for your relationship with your nanny, far more than it hurts you to share your apples. Very few nannies have the expectation of adding their grocery needs to you shopping list or cooking full meals at your home daily. The few that do also probably live in $30/hour nanny rate land.
Anonymous
07/11/2013 10:27
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I've never worked with a family who didn't politely invite me to help myself. If I'm out and about with the child I might get something interesting (yes, I'm a foodie) on a whim, but I don't really have time to go food shopping after (or before) my work hours. Getting enough sleep is much more important for the success of my job.
One job I had was 60 hours a week. Some of you seem to overlook how ridiculous it'd be if I had to grocery shop at night. That would be a definate deal breaker.
[/quote
I truly think this is the hardest part for most employers to understand. I don't want you to provide me with snacks/food because I feel entitled to it, often there simply isn't enough time in my day to run to the store/bank/clean my house/cook dinner/take care of anything personal when I am at your home for 12 hours a day. Yes, most nannies can get to the market on the weekend, but if I am in a rush in the morning or forgot to grab lunch, it's nice to know that you won't mind me making myself a sandwich.
Anonymous
07/11/2013 07:39
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:I've never worked with a family who didn't politely invite me to help myself. If I'm out and about with the child I might get something interesting (yes, I'm a foodie) on a whim, but I don't really have time to go food shopping after (or before) my work hours. Getting enough sleep is much more important for the success of my job.
One job I had was 60 hours a week. Some of you seem to overlook how ridiculous it'd be if I had to grocery shop at night. That would be a definate deal breaker.
Anonymous
07/11/2013 07:25
Subject: Re:Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:
Etiquette has nothing to do with it. The nanny isn't a guest. She's an employee and being provided with meals at a job is a negotiated perk.
Maybe its not necessarily an etiquette issue, but it is kind of low class to have someone in your home and not have drinks/snacks available for them. A nanny job is not a typical work place, so lets end that farce now (Im going to assume you're bright enough to recognize that if you're being honest) She is an employee, but she works in your home. I don't think full meals are necessary, but giving her access to your fruit, bottled water, lunch meat, etc. is no great difficulty and it IS polite.
I'm the poster you are quoting and I agree with you on this, except your low class nasty comment. It is kind and polite to have snacks on hand since a nanny can't exactly leave when she wants to buy something and has no access to sad vending machine cup a soup options many of us in other settings have access to. But thinking employers should provide meals and expecting to be able to freely request items from a family's shopping list is, to me, a perk, something to be negotiated if it's important to a nanny candidate, but not at all standard.
Fine for you and others to disagree, but for anyone to suggest this position is somehow some egregious violation of etiquette is, simply, wrong.
I agree with this and don't get how this is an etiquette question either after a point. As even Miss Manners says in her post, offering basic snacks would be nice. I don't necessarily think its an issue of politeness (on par with offering a houseguest something to drink). It's an issue of the nanny not being able to run out for a drink/snack/toiletry item if she needs to. Anything beyond that is simply not a standard nanny perk. If a nanny asked me while interviewing if I would be providing her lunch and having her add things to our grocery list, I might consider it, taking that into account on her total package. If a nanny I had hired started adding things to my grocery list, I would be really put off as it is not a standard live-out nanny arrangement at all.
Anonymous
07/10/2013 22:50
Subject: Re:Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:
Etiquette has nothing to do with it. The nanny isn't a guest. She's an employee and being provided with meals at a job is a negotiated perk.
Maybe its not necessarily an etiquette issue, but it is kind of low class to have someone in your home and not have drinks/snacks available for them. A nanny job is not a typical work place, so lets end that farce now (Im going to assume you're bright enough to recognize that if you're being honest) She is an employee, but she works in your home. I don't think full meals are necessary, but giving her access to your fruit, bottled water, lunch meat, etc. is no great difficulty and it IS polite.
I'm the poster you are quoting and I agree with you on this, except your low class nasty comment. It is kind and polite to have snacks on hand since a nanny can't exactly leave when she wants to buy something and has no access to sad vending machine cup a soup options many of us in other settings have access to. But thinking employers should provide meals and expecting to be able to freely request items from a family's shopping list is, to me, a perk, something to be negotiated if it's important to a nanny candidate, but not at all standard.
Fine for you and others to disagree, but for anyone to suggest this position is somehow some egregious violation of etiquette is, simply, wrong.
I wasn't calling you or OP low class nor did I suggest a nanny adding to the grocery list as necessary. I believe OP asked a genuine question looking for clarity and I offered my opinion. Apologies if it came across "nasty". I believe that knowing how to treat someone in your home; family, guest, employee, guy fixing your broken dishwasher, etc. is a matter of class. Someone with class looks for ways to be kind and generous to the people in their surround not looking to do as little unto others as they can justify. I maintain my opinion that if you find yourself unable offer your nanny access to simple things in your kitchen (fruit, snacks, drinks, etc) you ARE lacking in class.
Anonymous
07/10/2013 22:03
Subject: Re:Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:
Etiquette has nothing to do with it. The nanny isn't a guest. She's an employee and being provided with meals at a job is a negotiated perk.
Maybe its not necessarily an etiquette issue, but it is kind of low class to have someone in your home and not have drinks/snacks available for them. A nanny job is not a typical work place, so lets end that farce now (Im going to assume you're bright enough to recognize that if you're being honest) She is an employee, but she works in your home. I don't think full meals are necessary, but giving her access to your fruit, bottled water, lunch meat, etc. is no great difficulty and it IS polite.
I'm the poster you are quoting and I agree with you on this, except your low class nasty comment. It is kind and polite to have snacks on hand since a nanny can't exactly leave when she wants to buy something and has no access to sad vending machine cup a soup options many of us in other settings have access to. But thinking employers should provide meals and expecting to be able to freely request items from a family's shopping list is, to me, a perk, something to be negotiated if it's important to a nanny candidate, but not at all standard.
Fine for you and others to disagree, but for anyone to suggest this position is somehow some egregious violation of etiquette is, simply, wrong.
Anonymous
07/10/2013 19:57
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Etiquette has nothing to do with it. The nanny isn't a guest. She's an employee and being provided with meals at a job is a negotiated perk.
Common etiquette ought not be just for your houseguests. If it is in your world, I feel sorry for your co-workers, employers, spouse, children, parents, in-laws, friends, etc., but especially for any employee you may have.
Even Miss Manners specifically advises you to practice etiquette with your household employees. I don't suppose you read her column? You may want to reconsider your priorities.
Anonymous
07/10/2013 19:45
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Etiquette has nothing to do with it. The nanny isn't a guest. She's an employee and being provided with meals at a job is a negotiated perk.
Maybe its not necessarily an etiquette issue, but it is kind of low class to have someone in your home and not have drinks/snacks available for them. A nanny job is not a typical work place, so lets end that farce now (Im going to assume you're bright enough to recognize that if you're being honest) She is an employee, but she works in your home. I don't think full meals are necessary, but giving her access to your fruit, bottled water, lunch meat, etc. is no great difficulty and it IS polite.
+1
Anonymous
07/10/2013 19:37
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Etiquette has nothing to do with it. The nanny isn't a guest. She's an employee and being provided with meals at a job is a negotiated perk.
Maybe its not necessarily an etiquette issue, but it is kind of low class to have someone in your home and not have drinks/snacks available for them. A nanny job is not a typical work place, so lets end that farce now (Im going to assume you're bright enough to recognize that if you're being honest) She is an employee, but she works in your home. I don't think full meals are necessary, but giving her access to your fruit, bottled water, lunch meat, etc. is no great difficulty and it IS polite.
Anonymous
07/10/2013 17:31
Subject: Food for Nanny
Anonymous wrote:Etiquette has nothing to do with it. The nanny isn't a guest. She's an employee and being provided with meals at a job is a negotiated perk.
So you're the one we'll be reading about in the paper for starving the nanny. Lol.
Some of us do practice on-the-job etiquette. How else is your child going to learn to be a polite human being? Or is that not on your agenda?
Anonymous
07/10/2013 17:02
Subject: Food for Nanny
Etiquette has nothing to do with it. The nanny isn't a guest. She's an employee and being provided with meals at a job is a negotiated perk.
Anonymous
07/09/2013 16:36
Subject: Food for Nanny
Buy yourself an etiquette book.