Anonymous wrote:You could write her a reference letter that basically confirms employment, schedule, kids ages, duties, etc. Then she can opt to provide that letter (or not) to prospective employers and you don't have to take calls on her behalf.

A letter is worthless without a call to back it up.

Anonymous wrote:Just say - as employers do - that you don't provide references. Dates of employment & title only.

You shouldn't give a bad reference for the same reasons companies don't. Be cautious with references period.

Dates of employment sure. If you do go the route of telling what went wrong, cover the strengths too. And consider if the wrong things could have been worked on if you told her.

Second this ^^^

Just say - as employers do - that you don't provide references. Dates of employment & title only.

You shouldn't give a bad reference for the same reasons companies don't. Be cautious with references period.

Dates of employment sure. If you do go the route of telling what went wrong, cover the strengths too. And consider if the wrong things could have been worked on if you told her.

You could write her a reference letter that basically confirms employment, schedule, kids ages, duties, etc. Then she can opt to provide that letter (or not) to prospective employers and you don't have to take calls on her behalf.

Anonymous wrote:I'd cross that bridge only if it comes up. No need to make her feel bad. I might do an 'exit interview" and tell her "here are three things I think you should work on for your next job."

This is sage advice to impart on your Nanny as you let her go.

Knowing what she did (or didn’t do!) will definitely help her out in any future positions.

Just try to keep your criticism constructive as much as possible.

Good luck!

Why did she do? Is it a strong reason to fire her?.

Definitely, you should tell her. It would be fair for her to know what you are letting her go. Even though it's going to be a little hard for her to hear. This will help her to improve and help her find a better job with succes.

Since you are not describing the reason why you are letting her go; we can not know, if you were also the wrong fit for her. Parents also make mistakes and most of the times, it's not the nanny's fault

I'd cross that bridge only if it comes up. No need to make her feel bad. I might do an 'exit interview" and tell her "here are three things I think you should work on for your next job."

Should I tell the nanny the reason we are letting her go in case she would consider using us as a reference in the future? It would not be a glowing reference.