Find her replacement then let her go

Anonymous wrote:OP here - she was out for 4 days last week (sick and then did not feel safe driving) and then today asked for a day off next week to help a friend and another day in January. I am floored that she asked after being out. It is making me feel even more resolute in our decision (I had two phone interviews with other candidates over the weekend) and have someone coming for an in-person on Tuesday.

She has to know that this is not ok, right? Gah!

This is good. Say sorry we can’t make all these days off work so good riddance

oh yeah, time to move on.

Anonymous wrote:OP here - she was out for 4 days last week (sick and then did not feel safe driving) and then today asked for a day off next week to help a friend and another day in January. I am floored that she asked after being out. It is making me feel even more resolute in our decision (I had two phone interviews with other candidates over the weekend) and have someone coming for an in-person on Tuesday.

She has to know that this is not ok, right? Gah!

She clearly thinks it's ok and the job is flexible. You need to say NO to the requests. And, don't pay her for days off.

Eek OP!
Your Nanny sounds like less than an “okay” Nanny to me.
She sounds like a terrible one.

OP here - she was out for 4 days last week (sick and then did not feel safe driving) and then today asked for a day off next week to help a friend and another day in January. I am floored that she asked after being out. It is making me feel even more resolute in our decision (I had two phone interviews with other candidates over the weekend) and have someone coming for an in-person on Tuesday.

She has to know that this is not ok, right? Gah!

Be honest with yourself and look whatever it's best for you and for your children. It's easy to know due all the details you provide; you are not happy with her all. As a nanny myself, I'm totally understand what you are not happy having her anymore.

I could that she is not a Professional Nanny and the way she works it's very poor. Lack of reliability, no engaging with your children the way a Nanny should be doing, (outside and indoor activities) and also no cleaning up after her/them (their messes) after they play, eat, do crafts etc. This would be her total responsibility. And as a Nanny I couldn't stand "dirty dishes in the sink" from my part or from my employers. My bosses are responsible to clean up their own mess and I am responsible for my mess and my charges. It's very nice to set expectations from both parties so we can work in a good environment.

Also I am very surprised, that You as her employer; have not start to looking for someone else to replace her ASAP. Honestly, as I said as a Nanny myself, I can't imagine missing so many days at work. I would be embarrassed for my lack of professionalism.

When a Family look for a Nanny, the first thing they look is for someone responsible and very reliable and your Nanny, clearly is not a Great Nanny. She is just ok. Sorry to tell you, but that's what I think.

Don't feel bad. It's better to move and let her go. I'm sure you will find the right way to talk to her or just being honest and tell her your expectations have change. I believe , if she would be working for another Family, this family would have fired her already, for her lack of reliability. Honestly I don't know any Nanny who has missed too many days at work and still has her Job.

Good luck.

I would either tell her what she needs to work on and see if it improves or give her two weeks notice whatever your contract says, and say your child care needs have changed.

You be honest. She has missed to many days of work and its causing you issues at work. You hired a nanny to make your life easier and stable child care and this isn't stable child care.

If you haven't addressed any of this with her, she may think it's no big deal and your job is super flexible.

Also- I believe that you have to provide her with a written warning stating the issues. Then you have that as rebuttal if she tries to file for unemployment. It's proof she was fired for cause and not let go (unless of course you want to pay her unemployment)

Can you try and have a meeting with her to go over everything? See if it improves? I’m not saying you have to do that I’m just not sure if your mind is made up or if you want to salvage it.

Hired a nanny in July. She has been fine, but nothing great. House is messier than I want it to be. She is not proactive at all (does not do a sweep of the house to see if things need to be put away or wipe down the table after meals / snack / art projects). Often leaves dishes from her cooking / making things in the sink. Kids are safe and engaged, but not to the level I would like. Despite asking her many times to make sure they get outside time, she almost never takes them out. Again, she is fine but not great.

The thing that is becoming very challenging is she is out a lot. She was sick multiple times, had car trouble twice, had a roommate get a flat tire and need help, had a different roommate get sick at work and need to go to the dr. Every month there are at least two or three days she calls out or leaves early. And this week she was sick for three days. There was some bad weather and she did not want to come in (we are not in DC) and then today the roads were fine but she still felt uncomfortable driving.

I have had to reschedule or completely miss professional obligations because I need to be home when she is not here, so her missing so much work is impacting me.

But, I am conflict avoidant and hate the idea of firing someone (unless there was a safety issue then it is easier). I think I will be much happier with a different nanny, but I don't know what to tell her. "Its not a good fit any more" "We are going to do something else for child care" What is the best way to let her go?