Anonymous wrote:She still has yet to respond by the way.

Well why would she at this point? It sounds like you harassed her (which is what you would call the messaging on all platforms and showing up to her house, regardless of your intent or reason) and then you (likely illegally) broke the contract. Why do you think she would contact you after all that?

Did you pay a retainer fee in advance? Why did you contact her at the point where you said she wasn't responding? If it wasn't yet her start date, she has no responsibility to respond to you ASAP as she wasn't yet working.

Perhaps she was planning on ghosting you, or maybe it was your actions that further pushed her away? I'd see it as a red flag if I had a signed contract and parents started messaging me ahead of time expecting immediate responses. Definitely if you showed up to my home.

Also, I'm not sure that you can legally break a signed contract just because you didn't hear from the other party in a "timely manner" unless it was written into the contract that all correspondence would be replied to within x amount of time.

You wanted to find a nanny way to early. She probably found a better job than you offered. A month before you need a nanny to start is enough. There are tons of great Nannie’s out there

So sorry to hear that. And this it's not common at all. It's the first time I know about a Family hiring a nanny almost five months in advance. Nobody can wait for you for so long until you are willing to retain and pay her those months of wait. Really weird. Lots of things, changes can happen even if you wait for a position to start in 1 month. It was obvious if you missed total communication with her in the very first beginning; it was a big red flag and it was common sense she was not interested in the position and not available anymore. If she didn't respond in one week, while you were trying to contact her, all social media, phone etc. You should inmediatamente give for done the contract and move on. And immediately start looking for a new nanny. It was a waist of time from you waiting for her to respond and even go to her house?. You should be grateful to get rid of her. Clearly she was the worst nanny I have ever heard. Lack of professionalism and responsibility. A nanny.

OP, so sorry this happened to you - but am glad you found a much more responsible Nanny.

Not trying to be snarky OP ->> I just find it a little weird that you went to this prospective Nanny’s home.
Just that in itself would creep me out a tad.

It’s definitely not common to my knowledge and I’ve been a nanny for over ten years. She should’ve just said she was no longer interested. I wouldn’t of gone to her house but instead contacted her references.

Yes it’s rude she didn’t let you know. However, you hiring her in Sept for a Jan position makes you seem weird, and you going to her house to check on her is bizarre. You sound like you’re going to be very high maintenance to work for.

Anonymous wrote:Contract or not, it’s unreasonable to expect any worker to wait five months before starting a job and being paid. I don’t know that a global warning is warranted.

Yes, she should have told you that she was no longer interested or available but she didn’t so let it go.

She was transitioning from a full-time role she had as a caretaker for an elderly person and specifically asked for a longer transition period, which is why we thought it was a perfect fit. We weren't actively looking in September, but she had posted about wanting to go back to nannying starting the end of the year/early 2022, so we reached out to her. She still has yet to respond by the way. I honestly didn't think that happens often, and it sort of blindsided us, so I felt the need to write the "warning" post. Wish I had been warned when I started the nanny search.

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately, this is very very common and a big reason why people use agencies who have already vetted and established a relationship with the nannies

No, it is not common. First it’s uncommon to hire five months in advance so there is no way a ghosting is common.

Don’t be stupid.

Good thing you found out about her character flaw and work ethic now

Most families that hire significantly in advance pay a retainer fee.

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately, this is very very common and a big reason why people use agencies who have already vetted and established a relationship with the nannies

This does not have anything to do where you decide to start looking for a nanny. No any different between an Agency or this great site DC urban mom, Nextdoor, FB or through an Agency. It's completely about how the person/nanny you hired is. Her responsibility, her reliability, professionalism and communication with the family. You can find excellent, professional and high experienced nannies here. Don't think and judge the rest of nannies who are really great to hire.

Contract or not, it’s unreasonable to expect any worker to wait five months before starting a job and being paid. I don’t know that a global warning is warranted.

Yes, she should have told you that she was no longer interested or available but she didn’t so let it go.

Unfortunately, this is very very common and a big reason why people use agencies who have already vetted and established a relationship with the nannies

My wife and I had a nanny arranged to start at the end of this month. We met her back in September and had a meet and greet with the baby, interview, contract signed, etc. We were all ready to go.

Come December our soon to be nanny stops responding. We were concerned so we emailed, messaged on Nextdoor app, Facebook, the whole nine. Nothing. We were worried about her so we went to her house and sure enough she’s there and fine. She said she’s been busy and traveled for work so hadn’t had a chance to reply (which in my opinion is a red flag, it takes 15 seconds to send a reply). She said she’d call the following week and come by to see the baby. Next week goes by and nothing again. At this point we restart our nanny search because we only have 2.5 weeks until we need someone.

We ended up finding someone we liked even better than the original nanny so it was a blessing in disguise. We let her know the contract is void due to lack of communication and still nothing. I just wanted to put it out there that as prepared as you can be, and as much as you may think you like someone and can trust them, it could go the opposite.

Has this happened to you? Is this common? Why the ghost and not just say I’m no longer interested? It’s very disrespectful and as a mother I couldn’t imagine doing this to another mom. Very disappointed.