I prefer if what you feel is genuine gratitude. Genuine gratitude is not waiting for a "Thank you" for a "Thank you".

I don't have to accept or feel grateful for your gratitude. You spoke the words and my smile should be the indication that I heard you and pleased with what you said.

Perhaps, if you are a bit pleasant to me after saying "Thanks", that would mean more to me and would make the whole vibe more relaxed and friendly

i am from different culture and I do not like saying "you are welcome" either. In my mind, it somehow diminishes the value of the good deed, and honestly it sounds so generic, especially if someone thanks you for being great with their child. I learnt that Americans do expect answer, so I just say" sure, or "of course!" but not "you are welcome". I would prefer smile and nod as well though I am not Asian.

I am from an Asian country. For my people, a nod or a smile is equivalent to saying "you're welcome." We don't say "thank you" that much in the first place because we don't usually express emotions verbally. If you help someone, and that person is smiling shyly, we accept the smiley face as an expression of gratitude. I can't speak on behalf of other Asians, but I have friends from neighboring countries with similar cultures. In some countries, it is even disrespectful to say "thank you" to your close friends or family members because it feels like you keep them at arm's length. If your nanny was born in a foreign country, she may not know how to respond. I know I should say you're welcome when someone thanks me, but it never comes naturally.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I agree it’s rude. The polite response is “you’re welcome” but without knowing her we have no idea why she’s not saying it.

+1
I also agree that it is bad manners to not acknowledge a compliment.
Perhaps your Nanny takes any kind of praise awkwardly??

"Thank you" is both a compliment and praise now? Here I was just thinking it was a way to be polite and acknowledge gratitude. Wild world over here.

Anonymous wrote:When I thank her in a text she will ignore it. When I say it in person, she will give a nod or slight smile but again, won't really acknowledge.
Why would this be?

I am from another culture. I literally don't know what to do when hearing a thankyou, though I appreciate it a lot. She might be in the same boat. Also, expecting something back for thanking someone seems a bit weird to me. If you are thankful, just express it. Why expect something back?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I agree it’s rude. The polite response is “you’re welcome” but without knowing her we have no idea why she’s not saying it.

+1
I also agree that it is bad manners to not acknowledge a compliment.
Perhaps your Nanny takes any kind of praise awkwardly??

It makes me feel awkward. Acknowledge and move on please.

Anonymous wrote:OP I agree it’s rude. The polite response is “you’re welcome” but without knowing her we have no idea why she’s not saying it.

+1
I also agree that it is bad manners to not acknowledge a compliment.
Perhaps your Nanny takes any kind of praise awkwardly??

OP I agree it’s rude. The polite response is “you’re welcome” but without knowing her we have no idea why she’s not saying it.

It's weird. Does she thank you for anything? Is she bitter/resentful? Are there other issues going on?

Stop, OP. You’re being a jerk. You thank someone because you’re grateful for something. To expect a verbal or written response (and then whine when you don’t get it) is not being grateful.

Who cares? I say thank you to express my thanks, not to stand on ceremony and get a "You're welcome" back.

Jesus, what do you want her to say?! She heard you. No response is necessary.

Is she American? Not everyone uses “you’re welcome” for an answer as we do.

When I thank her in a text she will ignore it. When I say it in person, she will give a nod or slight smile but again, won't really acknowledge.
Why would this be?