Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is one of the disadvantages of having a nanny. Daycares don’t close (except for Covid...).

We did one week of our choosing/one week of hers. We explained she needed to give us two months notice, because we needed to figure out how to cover her absence.

You discuss this upfront and come to an agreement or move on to the next candidate. If things aren’t working out for you, figure out whether it’s easier to put up with the nanny you have or deal with your sad kids and the hassle of finding a new nanny.

Daycares don’t close?! We left a Jewish daycare because it closed for all major and minor Jewish holidays AND one winter and one summer break.

Jewish (and other religious) daycare is usually attached to a school, and it closes when the school closes. Secular centers don’t close except for Christmas.

You should have had this discussion in the interview and had it written into your contract. You screwed up, OP. When you renegotiate at her next anniversary discuss and write it in the contract.

Anonymous wrote:This is one of the disadvantages of having a nanny. Daycares don’t close (except for Covid...).

We did one week of our choosing/one week of hers. We explained she needed to give us two months notice, because we needed to figure out how to cover her absence.

You discuss this upfront and come to an agreement or move on to the next candidate. If things aren’t working out for you, figure out whether it’s easier to put up with the nanny you have or deal with your sad kids and the hassle of finding a new nanny.

Daycares don’t close?! We left a Jewish daycare because it closed for all major and minor Jewish holidays AND one winter and one summer break.

Anonymous wrote:Our nanny keeps informing us at inconvenient times that she needs to take a week or two off. Last year it was 2 weeks in January. This year it is a week in February. We told her last year she needed to take her vacations June-August or over December holidays. Our jobs do not allow us to just take a week or two off during peak times (Jan-May and Sept-Nov). Anyone else experienced this or have advice? If we move to new nanny do not want to end up in this situation again.

The only thing we ever asked of our nanny was just give us enough notice if she’s going on vacation. If the agreement in your contract is 2 weeks paid vacation at the nannies choice it’s really not your call to tell when to take vacation. Next time you draw up a contract how about you make that clear that you’re given 2 weeks of vacation but prefer if they take it during the summer months. I mean I still don’t think that’s fair but at least the nanny will know what they are signing up for. We give our nanny unlimited sick leave , 2 weeks of paid vacation (her choice) plus an additional 5 weeks because my husband and I like to travel and go on vacation plus she’s a mom and we think it’s important for her to be with her kid. Maybe if you’re offering other breaks a nanny might not feel so thrown off being told when and how to travel.

Looks like you have 2 months notice for her Feb vacation.

You employ a human being who watches your children and has a worthy life of her own. I don't understand this attitude of indentured servitude where you dictate all her off time.

Now if you're will to pay for her travel during PEAK travel times, she may be amenable. What is the weather like where she is going? Is there a reason for her to go in Feb? Even to get away during the winter? Have you asked?

This is one of the disadvantages of having a nanny. Daycares don’t close (except for Covid...).

We did one week of our choosing/one week of hers. We explained she needed to give us two months notice, because we needed to figure out how to cover her absence.

You discuss this upfront and come to an agreement or move on to the next candidate. If things aren’t working out for you, figure out whether it’s easier to put up with the nanny you have or deal with your sad kids and the hassle of finding a new nanny.

Anonymous wrote:Our nanny keeps informing us at inconvenient times that she needs to take a week or two off. Last year it was 2 weeks in January. This year it is a week in February. We told her last year she needed to take her vacations June-August or over December holidays. Our jobs do not allow us to just take a week or two off during peak times (Jan-May and Sept-Nov). Anyone else experienced this or have advice? If we move to new nanny do not want to end up in this situation again.

So you want her to take her vacation when its most expensive and most crowded?
You are not being fair. You can certainly choose your own week, but she should get to choose the other week. ( At a minimum)

We put it in our contract that the nanny gets two weeks of vacation per year, one of their choosing and one of ours (we gave a range). We also said that taking unpaid time off would be considered abandonment of the job and we could terminate for it.

After working three years, the nanny gets three years of vacation a year, but they have to be earned. So on January 1, you do not suddenly have three weeks. At the end of April you will have earned 1, at the end of August you will have accrued a 2nd, etc.

You should write any restrictions like this into your contract OP.

It's pretty tough to restrict the nanny to only a couple of months during which she's allowed to take her vacation, but you can do it. You should just be really upfront.

At least you have plenty of time to plan ahead, there are agencies that can provide excellent short term backup care.

OP, standard is to let her pick at least half of the weeks. It’s reasonable to ask her to give 1-3 months of notice, so that you can figure out your alternatives, but the same should apply to notifying her about any weeks you choose.

Limiting her to June-august or Christmas holidays isn’t reasonable. Summer vacation and Christmas vacation are peak travel times, making everything more costly as well as having her deal with more people. The only employers I know you actually CAN’T do any other weeks than the ones they specify are single-parent households going through a divorce, because they’re on a shoestring budget yet desperate to show the court that they have childcare figured out. Everyone else manages to find an agency, relative, nanny’s friend or some other alternative. I know a few families with young children who just take their vacation when the nanny wants to take hers: db covers her first week, mb covers her second week. Then they have one week to take together.

We are in the same situation as you (dual working household with really demanding hours, I travel(ed) 25-30%, etc.). We hired a backup nanny for daytime and then I’d have a sitter for evenings/nights, to put the kids to bed, because I usually do that. Our nanny agreement specifies one week of vacation is in the summer and coincides with our family summer vacation (for which we’ll give four months notice) but she can pick her other two weeks. We did write in a specific amount of lead time for which she’s supposed to let us know though, so we can arrange backup care.

Reasonable isn’t the issue - clearly our employers don’t fit previous poster’s definition of reasonable but we comply or risk losing our jobs. Expect the same from our nanny. She gets 2 weeks off every summer when we visit family. We do not get any other time off from our jobs. The other week is her choice but we have asked her to put it in one of the 4 months we can swing being around to train babysitters. Having a backup isn’t feasible when one of us is on the road. How do other families in this situation do it? Looking for responses from dual working parent households where at least one parent is on road 20 percent of time, and no family nearby.

You aren't reasonable to dictate when. Hire a back up nanny.

I think it's something that both agree on in the interview. It always has been like this, the family chooses one week, and I choose the other one. I have been with my current family for three years. They always choose theirs in summer, I choose mine at Christmas. It works for us.

I recommend you have backup care when the nanny chooses her vacation week(s), and you can't take time off.

Our nanny keeps informing us at inconvenient times that she needs to take a week or two off. Last year it was 2 weeks in January. This year it is a week in February. We told her last year she needed to take her vacations June-August or over December holidays. Our jobs do not allow us to just take a week or two off during peak times (Jan-May and Sept-Nov). Anyone else experienced this or have advice? If we move to new nanny do not want to end up in this situation again.