Anonymous
11/30/2019 21:53
Subject: Re:Considerations in making the decision to switch from APs to a nanny (house manager really)
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:We had an amazing nanny who was also our house manager and it was a true godsend. Aside from being a wonderful nanny to our DD, she handled everything except house work. Nanny handled all the ordering of supplies, all grocery shopping, paid and scheduled DD’s lessons and extras, ordered or took DD shopping for clothing staples (socks, underwear, sweats, tights, etc), kept a calendar of DD’s birthday parties and bought and wrapped the gifts, paid housekeeper and gave instructions to weekly gardener, made dental apts and wellness checks, called handyman for repairs - she did everything! She also did DD’s laundry and kept her closets and drawers up to date and packed away her too small clothes.
Basically whatever we needed on top of being a great nanny who was never once late and only twice sick (with stomach bug DD have her!).
She was not inexpensive - $27 an hour plus healthcare coverage.
I miss her every day!
How did you find her?
Oddly enough on care.com. I was signed with an agency but they sent me the typical nanny type. I looked through profiles myself and contacted the only two women you seemed applicable. Our nanny was older, former teacher and another unrelated career. Once I met her, I could bee how smart she was.
The key, I found, with care.com is for you (the employer) to search the profiles.
Anonymous
11/30/2019 20:28
Subject: Re:Considerations in making the decision to switch from APs to a nanny (house manager really)
Anonymous wrote:We had an amazing nanny who was also our house manager and it was a true godsend. Aside from being a wonderful nanny to our DD, she handled everything except house work. Nanny handled all the ordering of supplies, all grocery shopping, paid and scheduled DD’s lessons and extras, ordered or took DD shopping for clothing staples (socks, underwear, sweats, tights, etc), kept a calendar of DD’s birthday parties and bought and wrapped the gifts, paid housekeeper and gave instructions to weekly gardener, made dental apts and wellness checks, called handyman for repairs - she did everything! She also did DD’s laundry and kept her closets and drawers up to date and packed away her too small clothes.
Basically whatever we needed on top of being a great nanny who was never once late and only twice sick (with stomach bug DD have her!).
She was not inexpensive - $27 an hour plus healthcare coverage.
I miss her every day!
How did you find her?
Anonymous
11/30/2019 16:31
Subject: Re:Considerations in making the decision to switch from APs to a nanny (house manager really)
Anonymous wrote:We had an amazing nanny who was also our house manager and it was a true godsend. Aside from being a wonderful nanny to our DD, she handled everything except house work. Nanny handled all the ordering of supplies, all grocery shopping, paid and scheduled DD’s lessons and extras, ordered or took DD shopping for clothing staples (socks, underwear, sweats, tights, etc), kept a calendar of DD’s birthday parties and bought and wrapped the gifts, paid housekeeper and gave instructions to weekly gardener, made dental apts and wellness checks, called handyman for repairs - she did everything! She also did DD’s laundry and kept her closets and drawers up to date and packed away her too small clothes.
Basically whatever we needed on top of being a great nanny who was never once late and only twice sick (with stomach bug DD have her!).
She was not inexpensive - $27 an hour plus healthcare coverage.
I miss her every day!
NP here and this is who I want and need! You can get a maid service for cleaning but someone smart enough to handle all the details of a house and child would be amazing!
Anonymous
11/30/2019 15:11
Subject: Re:Considerations in making the decision to switch from APs to a nanny (house manager really)
Anonymous wrote:We had an amazing nanny who was also our house manager and it was a true godsend. Aside from being a wonderful nanny to our DD, she handled everything except house work. Nanny handled all the ordering of supplies, all grocery shopping, paid and scheduled DD’s lessons and extras, ordered or took DD shopping for clothing staples (socks, underwear, sweats, tights, etc), kept a calendar of DD’s birthday parties and bought and wrapped the gifts, paid housekeeper and gave instructions to weekly gardener, made dental apts and wellness checks, called handyman for repairs - she did everything! She also did DD’s laundry and kept her closets and drawers up to date and packed away her too small clothes.
Basically whatever we needed on top of being a great nanny who was never once late and only twice sick (with stomach bug DD have her!).
She was not inexpensive - $27 an hour plus healthcare coverage.
I miss her every day!
She wished up and found a job paying her $60/hr. You shouldn't be do cheap!
Anonymous
11/30/2019 15:09
Subject: Considerations in making the decision to switch from APs to a nanny (house manager really)
ADHD^^
Anonymous
11/30/2019 15:09
Subject: Considerations in making the decision to switch from APs to a nanny (house manager really)
Anonymous wrote:My husband and I work FT (more than FT really) and have had au pairs for the last six years. We use them on a split schedule so before school and after school, and one shift most weekends either Sat AM or Sun PM. We have had amazing experiences and terrible experiences, and at this point I’d consider us pretty seasoned host parents.
A few things I’ve been thinking about lately:
- One of our children has special needs (pretty severe ADHD that manifests in anxiety/anger) and can be very difficult. She has been a challenge for every single AP we have had, but she’s also had great relationships with each of them at the end of the day. So she really likes them- but I feel like from a day to day perspective we might be better off with a more mature, older care provider who could be more consistent and firm while still being loving.
- The biggest issue is actually that *I* feel burned out. I’m tired of making small talk every night. I’m tired of making an effort to be inclusive on weekends. Really I’m just tired and I feel like I could use a break from hosting. Our current au pair is really good, as far as au pairs go, so it’s not her- it’s me. I used to love hanging out with our au pairs at night and now I dread it. We are still very generous with them in terms of pay and gifts and all that, but I feel like I’m not as good of a HM as I used to be.
- We need coverage until 8:30 at night M-TH and occasionally on F. Both kids are in school until about 3:30-4. I’m thinking of seeing if I can get a nanny/HM to cook, run errands, organize, do light housekeeping/laundry/etc either 12:30-8:30 M-F or maybe start earlier but end earlier every other Friday (if this is appealing). I figure the daytime coverage is enough that if the kids are sick my husband and I can make things work between us until mid-day, which is way less disruptive than missing a full day.
I guess I’m just throwing all this around in my head. Is it worth paying what will certainly be much more for a nanny/HM, given my position? We currently pay about $800 extra per month in after care as an “insurance policy” for flaky APs and ideally we could stop paying that with a reliable nanny who hopefully wouldn’t bail on us! (We had one bad rematch situation and started doing this after that!)
It is unconscionable that you had an au pair for a child with severe AFYHD!
Anonymous
11/30/2019 15:06
Subject: Re:Considerations in making the decision to switch from APs to a nanny (house manager really)
We had an amazing nanny who was also our house manager and it was a true godsend. Aside from being a wonderful nanny to our DD, she handled everything except house work. Nanny handled all the ordering of supplies, all grocery shopping, paid and scheduled DD’s lessons and extras, ordered or took DD shopping for clothing staples (socks, underwear, sweats, tights, etc), kept a calendar of DD’s birthday parties and bought and wrapped the gifts, paid housekeeper and gave instructions to weekly gardener, made dental apts and wellness checks, called handyman for repairs - she did everything! She also did DD’s laundry and kept her closets and drawers up to date and packed away her too small clothes.
Basically whatever we needed on top of being a great nanny who was never once late and only twice sick (with stomach bug DD have her!).
She was not inexpensive - $27 an hour plus healthcare coverage.
I miss her every day!
Basically whatever we needed on top of being a great nanny who was never once late and only twice sick (with stomach bug DD have her!).
She was not inexpensive - $27 an hour plus healthcare coverage.
I miss her every day!
Anonymous
11/30/2019 14:11
Subject: Considerations in making the decision to switch from APs to a nanny (house manager really)
My husband and I work FT (more than FT really) and have had au pairs for the last six years. We use them on a split schedule so before school and after school, and one shift most weekends either Sat AM or Sun PM. We have had amazing experiences and terrible experiences, and at this point I’d consider us pretty seasoned host parents.
A few things I’ve been thinking about lately:
- One of our children has special needs (pretty severe ADHD that manifests in anxiety/anger) and can be very difficult. She has been a challenge for every single AP we have had, but she’s also had great relationships with each of them at the end of the day. So she really likes them- but I feel like from a day to day perspective we might be better off with a more mature, older care provider who could be more consistent and firm while still being loving.
- The biggest issue is actually that *I* feel burned out. I’m tired of making small talk every night. I’m tired of making an effort to be inclusive on weekends. Really I’m just tired and I feel like I could use a break from hosting. Our current au pair is really good, as far as au pairs go, so it’s not her- it’s me. I used to love hanging out with our au pairs at night and now I dread it. We are still very generous with them in terms of pay and gifts and all that, but I feel like I’m not as good of a HM as I used to be.
- We need coverage until 8:30 at night M-TH and occasionally on F. Both kids are in school until about 3:30-4. I’m thinking of seeing if I can get a nanny/HM to cook, run errands, organize, do light housekeeping/laundry/etc either 12:30-8:30 M-F or maybe start earlier but end earlier every other Friday (if this is appealing). I figure the daytime coverage is enough that if the kids are sick my husband and I can make things work between us until mid-day, which is way less disruptive than missing a full day.
I guess I’m just throwing all this around in my head. Is it worth paying what will certainly be much more for a nanny/HM, given my position? We currently pay about $800 extra per month in after care as an “insurance policy” for flaky APs and ideally we could stop paying that with a reliable nanny who hopefully wouldn’t bail on us! (We had one bad rematch situation and started doing this after that!)
A few things I’ve been thinking about lately:
- One of our children has special needs (pretty severe ADHD that manifests in anxiety/anger) and can be very difficult. She has been a challenge for every single AP we have had, but she’s also had great relationships with each of them at the end of the day. So she really likes them- but I feel like from a day to day perspective we might be better off with a more mature, older care provider who could be more consistent and firm while still being loving.
- The biggest issue is actually that *I* feel burned out. I’m tired of making small talk every night. I’m tired of making an effort to be inclusive on weekends. Really I’m just tired and I feel like I could use a break from hosting. Our current au pair is really good, as far as au pairs go, so it’s not her- it’s me. I used to love hanging out with our au pairs at night and now I dread it. We are still very generous with them in terms of pay and gifts and all that, but I feel like I’m not as good of a HM as I used to be.
- We need coverage until 8:30 at night M-TH and occasionally on F. Both kids are in school until about 3:30-4. I’m thinking of seeing if I can get a nanny/HM to cook, run errands, organize, do light housekeeping/laundry/etc either 12:30-8:30 M-F or maybe start earlier but end earlier every other Friday (if this is appealing). I figure the daytime coverage is enough that if the kids are sick my husband and I can make things work between us until mid-day, which is way less disruptive than missing a full day.
I guess I’m just throwing all this around in my head. Is it worth paying what will certainly be much more for a nanny/HM, given my position? We currently pay about $800 extra per month in after care as an “insurance policy” for flaky APs and ideally we could stop paying that with a reliable nanny who hopefully wouldn’t bail on us! (We had one bad rematch situation and started doing this after that!)