Anonymous wrote:We give raises and bonuses throughout the year but we don't advertise that when matching. Many APs don't realize additional benefits that families may offer, but some are very savvy. There are networks of APs (Brazil has a big group, for example) that will compare benefits and experiences, and pass on info to prospective APs so they come into the interview hoping for more. My APs haven't really known any other APs prior to the program so they just expect what the agency promises them, then when we give raises and bonuses they are pretty appreciative.

I've interviewed Brazilians during matching, but get turned off when they start mentioning stuff from these comparisons. I refuse to match with someone with a blatant attitude of "what will you give me." There have been stories in our area about APs that coach the toddler to tell the parents that AP "needs" an Apple Watch for Christmas or the latest iPhone. Nope... next!

I have one school-aged child and we rarely use more than 20 hours a week. I also pay the stipend and follow the rules. We offer extra perks but don't advertise them.

We pay the stipend and follow the rules. We probe how AP would react to other APs when comparing perks and situations. We tell them this happens frequently. The best ones are those who say it’s fine—I was the only one who had to watch my baby sister when all of my friends were partying.

Anonymous wrote:We pay the stipend amount. 4 school age kids, 25-30 hrs/wk during school year, 45/week during summer. But, we’re also very respectful and kind to AP, cell phone paid for, Netflix available, car available for off duty use, we’re as flexible as possible with vacation requests and will often end up giving an extra week or two of vacation times depending on year.

Biggest factor is treating au pair decently. I could double the stipend and treat au pair like trash but I bet that would flip the happiness factor straight to misery. Well compensated misery I guess?

I absolutely agree with this. We will shortly start our 12th year of hosting. We do not pay more than the stipend. If a week is really taxing or required multiple changes, I will do a $20 gift card but not regularly enough that it's expected. We also do paid iphone, Netflix, car available, and extra vacation provided it works with my work/travel schedule. In addition, we make a point of telling our APs that we will treat them like adults - no curfew, their own car to use as they see fit, a credit card to use for household items/outings, and an open welcome for their friends to come over and stay over - as long as they act like adults. I have no interest in policing AP behavior, so an AP who didn't act like an adult would go to another family, not get extra rules in place. This hasn't happened in 11 years so I don't expect it to. We have no problem attracting highly sought APs, even with our small house and shared (with one child) bathroom, because we are clear that we are interested in AP as a person, supportive of their growth during their year with us, and proactive about engaging and welcoming them. 9 of our previous APs stay in touch, and 8 have come back to visit, several multiple times. I make sure I share the fact that we value our relationship with the AP in our introductory note, and we have no problem getting connections or matching when it's time. I agree that all the money in the world doesn't make a miserable relationship worth it. Several of our APs' friends have lived in enormous mansions with their own wing and a Range Rover to drive, but they were treated like help and not welcomed, and they looked wistfully at our APs who had their favorite soups made for them for lunch when I have time to cook, even with their small bedroom, standard stipend, and Toyota Carolla.

Anonymous wrote:We pay minimum. And your question is stupid.
But we also fly ap to Disney World for a week with a friend and they have their own room on property. That alone is $3500+. AP will work maybe 6-8 hours that week.

We will fly ap home once during their year home/or fly them anywhere in the USA. Value of 500-1000.

AP will live at beach house for most of summer, work 30 hours. Off by 4pm and at bars by 5pm all summer.
Try to put a value on that, basically every 20 somethings dream.

Not my dream if ive made friends where I live and now im living somewhere else for the summer. Who am I gonna hang with on my time off?

Anonymous wrote:We pay the stipend amount. 4 school age kids, 25-30 hrs/wk during school year, 45/week during summer. But, we’re also very respectful and kind to AP, cell phone paid for, Netflix available, car available for off duty use, we’re as flexible as possible with vacation requests and will often end up giving an extra week or two of vacation times depending on year.

Biggest factor is treating au pair decently. I could double the stipend and treat au pair like trash but I bet that would flip the happiness factor straight to misery. Well compensated misery I guess?

+1

We pay the stipend amount. 4 school age kids, 25-30 hrs/wk during school year, 45/week during summer. But, we’re also very respectful and kind to AP, cell phone paid for, Netflix available, car available for off duty use, we’re as flexible as possible with vacation requests and will often end up giving an extra week or two of vacation times depending on year.

Biggest factor is treating au pair decently. I could double the stipend and treat au pair like trash but I bet that would flip the happiness factor straight to misery. Well compensated misery I guess?

We give raises and bonuses throughout the year but we don't advertise that when matching. Many APs don't realize additional benefits that families may offer, but some are very savvy. There are networks of APs (Brazil has a big group, for example) that will compare benefits and experiences, and pass on info to prospective APs so they come into the interview hoping for more. My APs haven't really known any other APs prior to the program so they just expect what the agency promises them, then when we give raises and bonuses they are pretty appreciative.

Anonymous wrote:We pay minimum. And your question is stupid.
But we also fly ap to Disney World for a week with a friend and they have their own room on property. That alone is $3500+. AP will work maybe 6-8 hours that week.

We will fly ap home once during their year home/or fly them anywhere in the USA. Value of 500-1000.

AP will live at beach house for most of summer, work 30 hours. Off by 4pm and at bars by 5pm all summer.
Try to put a value on that, basically every 20 somethings dream.

How is she buying food at Disney for a week when she makes such low wages??

Not a stupid question. I am curious about this as well. I never offered above the minimum. Following to see what others say. Lots of unnecessary snark on this board...don't pay it any mind.

We pay minimum. And your question is stupid.
But we also fly ap to Disney World for a week with a friend and they have their own room on property. That alone is $3500+. AP will work maybe 6-8 hours that week.

We will fly ap home once during their year home/or fly them anywhere in the USA. Value of 500-1000.

AP will live at beach house for most of summer, work 30 hours. Off by 4pm and at bars by 5pm all summer.
Try to put a value on that, basically every 20 somethings dream.

I pay well above the minimum and I still struggle to match. It’s not just money. APs have a wide range of preferences and expectations.

Anonymous wrote:States can’t currently require you to pay more than the stipend. Rather than just looking at cash in hand, look at your total package. Location, public transport/car access, number/age of kids, schedule/total hours, duties, benefits, family vs employee, etc.

+1 I think this is great advice!

States can’t currently require you to pay more than the stipend. Rather than just looking at cash in hand, look at your total package. Location, public transport/car access, number/age of kids, schedule/total hours, duties, benefits, family vs employee, etc.

Does anyone have insight into how many families pay above the minimum $196/$200? The agencies don't collect this data, to my knowledge. They should know what percentage of APs live in states where the minimum is higher than that due to state wage laws, but I haven't seen them publicize that. Has anyone seen info on this? I can't tell in the match process if I'm getting turned down for other families that offer more, or if it's other match/fit issues.

Thanks!