Nanny here. You’re freaking out because your child is three. Wait another year or two until drop off play dates start, then look back at this and smile. I’ve dropped kids off at homes and the parents a) had no idea kids were going to a play date and b) don’t know the nanny or parent, but c) they trust my judgement. Soon, you’ll be dropping your kid off for activities or just in town with friends. Nothing happened, so just have a reset conversation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK by me. I gave my (Brazilian) APs lots of freedom along with responsibility. I knew all her AP friends and most of the other APs in the neighborhood.

Geez, it's no wonder some of you have a hard time matching and keeping APs!

You all must be awful to work for/with professionally, too.

I get to know who my child is with. If people don’t like that, find another family.

The only time you get to control anything is when you are actually there. Stop fooling yourself. You are not in charge.

Perhaps, but I retain hiring and firing authority.

You mean the way the AP can drop you?
Stop trying to be a control freak. Shame on you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK by me. I gave my (Brazilian) APs lots of freedom along with responsibility. I knew all her AP friends and most of the other APs in the neighborhood.

Geez, it's no wonder some of you have a hard time matching and keeping APs!

You all must be awful to work for/with professionally, too.

I get to know who my child is with. If people don’t like that, find another family.

The only time you get to control anything is when you are actually there. Stop fooling yourself. You are not in charge.

Perhaps, but I retain hiring and firing authority.

+1000.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK by me. I gave my (Brazilian) APs lots of freedom along with responsibility. I knew all her AP friends and most of the other APs in the neighborhood.

Geez, it's no wonder some of you have a hard time matching and keeping APs!

You all must be awful to work for/with professionally, too.

I get to know who my child is with. If people don’t like that, find another family.

The only time you get to control anything is when you are actually there. Stop fooling yourself. You are not in charge.

Perhaps, but I retain hiring and firing authority.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK by me. I gave my (Brazilian) APs lots of freedom along with responsibility. I knew all her AP friends and most of the other APs in the neighborhood.

Geez, it's no wonder some of you have a hard time matching and keeping APs!

You all must be awful to work for/with professionally, too.

I get to know who my child is with. If people don’t like that, find another family.

The only time you get to control anything is when you are actually there. Stop fooling yourself. You are not in charge.

Anonymous wrote:OK by me. I gave my (Brazilian) APs lots of freedom along with responsibility. I knew all her AP friends and most of the other APs in the neighborhood.

Geez, it's no wonder some of you have a hard time matching and keeping APs!

You all must be awful to work for/with professionally, too.

I get to know who my child is with. If people don’t like that, find another family.

"Another nanny" Your AP is not a "nanny."

Was it another AP? Someone she has come to know well, have playdates with, and your child feels comfortable with?

or was this a random other nanny that happened to be at the park and your AP and child have never met before?

I think in general it is a not acceptable, but the question is what were the circumstances?

1. Is AP coming from culture where it is totally fine, as some “it take a village” cultures are?

2. How well AP knew the nanny?

3. Why AP had to go to the store to begin with (eg, “child threw up everywhere in the car and I urgently needed Clorox wipes” is totally different from “I felt like getting a coffee”$?

I think circumstances and the fact that it looks like the nanny did not kidnap the child and everything was OK, would determine the next step. You can be furious, but what is productive next step (explaining it is not OK, or a more stringent reset conversation, or rematch)?

OK by me. I gave my (Brazilian) APs lots of freedom along with responsibility. I knew all her AP friends and most of the other APs in the neighborhood.

Geez, it's no wonder some of you have a hard time matching and keeping APs!

You all must be awful to work for/with professionally, too.

Not ok. Do you even know this nanny?

How old is the AP?

Not acceptable. The parents should have been called and asked if there was some kind of emergency necessitating a store run. Who is this other person. What is she wasn’t there when AP returned??

Curious what others say. Our ap watched another Ap’s 1 yr Old host kid while the other AP took my preschooler and her 3 ur old host kid to a public bathroom at the park. If I was 1 yr old’s hf I would be pretty ticked off

Did she leave your child with another AP that you know?

While they were at the park she went to a store across the street and left my son with another nanny for 10 minutes. I was furious, would you be?